Dear Sanna - catching up

Sorry I haven't been blogging - it's not because nothing is going on, just too much! I have been so busy. We had our premier of a new ballet, plus my premier in a new part for an old ballet, and another performance of my favorite piece in the company's repetoire (this was all one performance - a triple bill). I was pretty nervous because I do a lot in this program. In the new ballet I am doing almost all corps parts, plus a few demi-soloist type things. This is a lot in itself, although of all the pieces I have seen which the director choreographed, this is by far my favorite.

Then I do the second piece, which is only 6 girls and 6 guys, so the rest of the company gets a break at this time. Just because it is new for me, it takes a lot of energy, plus it is a pretty technical piece. I am also very happy to dance this ballet, too. It is a nice challenge, and I enjoy the choreography and music very much.

The third piece is by far my favorite. I think it is also one of the hardest things I've done here, but I enjoy it so much and have become very comfortable with it since we performed it a few times now.

The premier went pretty well, and after the director told me I looked better (just I shouldn't smile. apparently she tells everyone this, so I don't feel so bad, but she says I look like there is a bad smell when I smile. It's hard for me to control my face at all, let alone to not smile without looking miserable or blank)

Then we went on an overnight tour with the story ballet. It was fun to get away a little, stay in a hotel and explore a different place, but we came home very late after the last show there, and I was exhausted. We had a day off but my sleep pattern was messed up and when we returned to work the day after, I felt very weak and tired.

To top off my mood, the dancer whom I understudy came to me and told me her grandmother was sick so she will not be dancing next thursday, and I will go in again for her. Looking back on the last show I filled in for her, I am actually pretty embarrassed. I just was not well enough prepared for this role, and it's not great for my confidence that I fell into this role by default, not because I was chosen. Anyway every time I saw the other dancer in this part after, I was honestly relieved it wasn't me. So I wasn't exactly thrilled with this news. The rehearsals that day didn't go so great. I was tired and had to work the hardest out of everyone, staying late after to make sure I remembered all the parts and trying to clean them a little.

I went home and thought about all my corrections, got a good night's sleep, and decided that I needed to chance the part of the variation that stressed me out so much (the one that caused me to yell at the director, etc.). The other dancer actually chanced it a long time ago, so the next day I came and asked if I could do the same. Rehearsals went so much better that day. I feel so much more secure in the role. AND, while I was rehearsing the variation, the director came in a gave a few corrections and said it was much better. After I even asked for a new pair of pointe shoes (in this company this is a very big deal and difficult process) and the director gave them to me without hesitation and told me I looked much better and I would have a lot of opportunities here! She is officially done hating me! yay!!!

So now I still have almost a week to prepare for the role, with a newfound confidence, new shoes, and a new outlook. Janie is happy :)

Janie

Dancing has it's own life -

Good morning, Janie,

I realize I have been 'away' from the blog. My work is bustling with performers who want to do what they do better and stronger and I have been developing a program with a local MD for weight loss. I am also finishing up a weight management program. So it has been an involved time for us here at Mental Performances.

I also consciously decided to allow your previous blog to float, meaning to not directly intervene. It is important to recognize that as in life, ballet has this anguish that can be all consuming along with the joy and passion that is equally as consuming.
Moving through difficult times is hard, really hard becasue you feel it in every cell of the body, your soul and you have to use the soul driven body to express this beautiful passion and joy.

When someone behaves in that way toward you in the studio or street, the question is - Where are the boundaries? If you best friend spoke to you in that way, you might decide to step away from the relationship. If a stranger shouted at you, you might return the impulse with a shout, or create distance by walking away.

In the studio there can be FEAR and CONTROL instilled by some teachers (who have emotional problems). This does not describe all teachers and there certainly is a difference between being firm and having a angry tirade because the piece is in shambles and show time is days away AND an emotional assault. Sadly some ballet dancers believe that emotional assaults are OK and just the way it is.

Not all companies and teachers emotionally abuse their company members and students. Let's be clear. Arnott Mader, Richmond Ballet is a prime example. he is dearly loved by generations of dance students and professionals. His classes are described as kick ass and down right hard and inspiring. How does he do it? A careful balance of love and guidance. I have sat in on his classes. He is tough, challenging, would never EVER denigrate a student. His respect for them provides a mentoring relationship.

One little dancer with serious performance angst said during her session, "My teacher said that her teacher was mean and a good ballet teacher has to be firm; otherwise we will get lazy." Is this true? Absolutely not.

What is the message here? This teacher may believe that she drives motivation, (She is in fantasy land). Associating FEAR with motivation and performance may work with a small few. Not for most. You dance because you choose this as your profession. It is your 'soul' expression of who you are. No one can make anyone handle the rigors of ballet unless one is internally motivated and passionate about ballet.

Without rambling on ... You have to choose.

Do you internalize someone's emotional troubles and create destructive belief systems about yourself and your performance capabilities?

How do you manage? Do you dare to speak up? What IF you called a meeting? What if you respectfully pulled a teacher aside after class and politely said, "I understand you are frustrated, yet I work better if you show me exactly what I need to do. please do not say those mean things to me."

Maybe she needs to hear this. What are the risks? Your job? Roles? Respect? Boundaries?
You wouldn't know unless you change your response.

You can also decide methods to manage the stress.

1. I would HIGHLY recommend that you do kind things for yourself everyday. Could you listen to one of the programs on the MENTAL PERFORMANCES audios once a day (They are 15 minutes). These can give you a necessary boost and put things in perspective. I will send you my newest "Performance Brilliance" on the Coach in my Bag MP3 player for performers.

DO NOT WAIT until you are stressed to try to feel better, Feel increasingly better NOW becasue these moments will occur.

2. Talk with a friend about what is true. You can make a list of what you believe about your dancing. You will discover that most of it is opinion and false.

You can dance here in the STATES, Janie. That is a limiting belief for next post. Could you write a little about that.

I must attend to my work ... I will be in touch after you respond.

Sanna Carapellotti, MS CHt
MentalPerformances.com

Creator of Coach in My Bag MP3 for performers!

Dear Sanna - feeling better

That was a frustrating patch, but I am feeling much better. It's funny how you can feel completely different when nothing really changes. We had the last performance of the program we took on tour last monday. It was the one the dancer in the company helped me work on, and also the one where I dance with the girl who is very difficult to work with. The next day half the company was away doing a children's performance, and the director asked to talk to me.

She apparently was very angry about this rehearsal the day before I had to step in for that big role, weeks ago. She was screaming at me while I tried to do the hardest, most stressful thing, so I lost it and said "I can't concentrate when you're screaming at me!". Normally she would respond to a comment like this, but for some reason she didn't. It was not THAT bad, especially compared to how a lot of other people act, but it was unlike me, and for some reason the director either truly felt very offended, or wants me to think that. She said she will never forget that and that's why she didn't really talk to me for a few weeks.

In this same talk she told me I dance too stiffly (she always says this but this time was more critical. she was just not happy that day in general and there weren't enough people at work to yell at, so I got it pretty bad)and the show monday was not any better (When I told the dancer who worked with me about this she was very surprised). She also said I need to lose weight.

This is just how the director is. She can go from loving you to hating you in a second, so it's normal for a period where she doesn't like me, it's just not all that pleasant. Once I lose a little weight, I'm sure she will love me again. She is already kinder towards me.

Oh yeah and remember how I danced that piece for that girl who left and then she came back and went back in to her old part? Well now I am back in, replacing another girl. It's not as big a part, and I have new challenges, but I am happy to be dancing this piece again.

In other news, here's this article I found on my role model! In case you're interested...

http://elise-wwwwords.blogspot.com/2010/05/janie-taylor-new-york-city-ballet.html

Janie

Dear Sanna - my biggest fear

I guess my biggest fear is just wasting time and being unhappy. I hate to think I am wasting time working the wrong way or working for something I will never achieve. I just don't want to get stuck in a place if it doesn't make me truly happy.

I am feeling a little better about things, though. One of the best dancers in the company, who is making the transition into teaching, took me aside the other day to really work with me on one of the parts I especially have trouble with. I forgot what it's like to really work on something and see results. Unlike the other teachers who just scream and make me frustrated, she knows how to actually get me to fix the problems. I can't stand to hear over and over again the same corrections: "you don't bend enough" "more!" "you're not together" "jump!" I feel like I am "bending" as much as I can. More what? When exactly are we not together and why? How can I fix these things without knowing specifically what I need to do?

So this dancer is great, helping me break down each problematic area and discovering why it doesn't look quite right. I move my arms and legs together, instead of my arms being slightly ahead, so it looks stiff and frantic. Simple as that, without actually bending more, I am giving off that effect.

Also a nice day of rest with good friends always helps. As much as I love my friends here of different cultures, sometimes I find it really hard to be myself. I can't make references to pop culture or even make too many jokes, because it gets lost in translation. And sometimes I just feel like there is nothing to say to get off the subject of work. I love talking about ballet - it's my passion. I even wonder sometimes why I don't get sick of talking about it, because sometimes I feel like I could just never get tired of it and I don't understand when other dancers refuse to watch ballets on tv or do anything associated with dance after working hours. But finally I am beginning to understand. When I have a bad day at work or I am stressed out about it, I just want to get my mind off it, and with certain people I can't think of anything else to talk about.

That's why I was so happy for a short get away with this great group of friends I found. One is in the company with me, but the rest are just great, normal (well at least non-dancers) people who happen to love lots of the same things I do and speak English perfectly. It's the best and I feel so lucky to have found my niche with them.

Janie

Needs -

What is your biggest fear?

Sanna

Dear Sanna - zero confidence

It's been a week now since the show, but I'll briefly tell you how it went. We worked on the variation a little, and like everything, the first time it's natural and maybe not so good, but fairly comfortable for me. Then I work on it and the corrections are uncomfortable so it doesn't look so good, but eventually after a lot of work it gets there. But there just wasn't time for this whole process, so I was trying to do a mixture of corrections and comfort. Anyway who knows how it would've gone under normal circumstances, because we got stuck in traffic and arrived an hour and a half before the show, after doing class in the studio and driving more than 4 hours.

So I was pretty cold and we had no time for spacing, during which I planned on doing everything full for a little extra practice, warm-up, and breaking in new pointe shoes all at once. But there was just time to do my hair and makeup, get dressed, and run the variation before show time. I opted for the older shoes. I felt much more stable during the partnering sections and I tried to "dance" more, but by the end of the variation both my shoes and my foot had had it, and I had to turn my last 6 italian fouettes into a pique turn diagonal. Everyone said it was a good save, but I am yet to see the video, and I felt pretty frantic during the italian fouettes I did do.

Anyway lately I just feel like a kicked puppy. I find it hard to take corrections without getting personally offended, and I am even more self-conscious than normal. I can just feel everyone's eyes on me during barre especially, but all the time. I can barely use my head for subconscious fear of making eye contact with someone! What is wrong with me? And I am just depressed about the state of my dancing instead of inspired to get better. Maybe letting this all out itself with help a little, but I am just so disgruntled. Everyone says all the time that I look embarrassed or like I don't want to be there when I am dancing, and I need to dance like I think I'm amazing, but how can I do that if I know it's not true? I hate when people dance with forced expression. I think it's something you naturally have or acquire, but not something you can force.

I just feel like crying. I thought I couldn't dance in the states, but actually I'm getting the feeling that can't dance anywhere else. I can't be this european ballerina/actress.

Janie

Dear Sanna - another chance?

Well Erin came today, but I had a private rehearsal scheduled for her part, so it looks like I will be dancing this part in the next show, too. I have no idea if this is based on the fact that Erin is too sick to do it, since she did look pretty weak today and it is her first day back in a while, or if the director wants me to dance or what. I haven't even seen the director since the show, because she did not come backstage after and has been home sick ever since.

Either way, I will be dancing Thursday. When people asked me if I wanted to dance again, I didn't really know how to answer, because I think this is important experience that I need, but I also think that I need time to get the part really good. I feel that I do a part the first time how it feels most natural to me. Then I get corrections, and it feels awkward as I try to get the corrections into my body, and maybe it doesn't look so great and I can't get through as easily as the first time. Then I eventually work it out so I can perform with the corrections without looking awkward. So this is a process that we just don't have time for now. Anyway I suppose a few more rehearsals couldn't hurt, so I will just count this as my second chance at being thrown in at the last minute. I still can't expect perfection, but hopefully I will be slightly less terrified when I step on stage.

Wish me "merde" again!

Janie

Yes, you are also a teacher.

Janie, what a moment for you. Growth, Inspiring commitment.

In our work (whatever path we chose) there will be difficult moments. In my office a few years ago, someone had a psychotic break down; At a restaurant, a chef burns his hand somehow; On the field a player misses a catch to lose the game.

Understand that these moments make you stronger and a teacher for others who may be placed in the same position one day. How you handle them makes a huge difference in the moment, how others view you and how you handle situations in the future.

Of course this situation was less then optimal. It is never be optimal all the time. Yet, we are all called to do the best we can with what we have at THAT moment.

You write here about the wide range of experiences that are a part of this ballet world -- What the audience never sees and will certainly never experience, unless they are close with a performer.

Yes, it can take its toll in the moment with a headache and shakiness as you described below ... That was because YOU, Janie, put forth so much effort and so much energy that you stressed the body over its capacity. You had a responsibiltity to do your best. You survived and recovered.

That is a professional. You, Janie.

Sanna Carapelotti, MS CHt
Hypnotherapy and EFT for Dancers
Mentalperformances.com

PS: If you are not sleeping like Janie, You would not have had the power to do what she had been called to do. Buy Sleep here.

Dear Sanna - I survived

I feel like I just survived a trauma! After the performance, or even really after the first act (which is the hardest for this role), I had such a headache and I was sweating a lot and shakey and I could barely think, but at the same time incredibly relieved.

Of course it could have gone better. I only had one actual rehearsal with the intentions of performing, so mixed with watching a very outdated video several times last night and this morning, I wasn't exactly expecting perfection. But it was fine. Actually, in my opinion the worst part was when I stumbled doing a borre in the very beginning and almost fell. I'm told it was barely noticeable, but it felt HUGE! It's really hard to continue after that, but I forced myself not to worry about it and pretend it didn't happen. The variation was fine, although I did run out of steam a little bit in the end. In general I think I just probably looked about as nervous and tired as I was, since I did almost a full run before the show. I wanted to feel comfortable, so I thought it was better to try everything before the show. It doubled my rehearsals, so it must help a little, right?

But everyone was really nice. All my fellow dancers were really supportive, and even the ballet mistress who I can't stand was fairly nice. I got so much chocolate as gifts! And my best even got me a bottle of champagne, it was so sweet. I didn't see the artistic director for feedback, although she was actually in the audience, to my surprise.

It was definitely an experience. So stressful! I just had to keep reminding myself not to be too dramatic and not take myself so seriously. Because when I think about someone else in my situation, it seems much healthier to be optimistic and upbeat. It just makes everyone around you nervous if you seem completely unconfident. Let's just cross our fingers that Erin is better by the show on Thursday!

Janie

Quick Change Ballet

Wow, Janie, I am impressed with your ability to adjust to role changes and be so courageous to perform with our much rehearsal time. That is confidence, my friend.

Sanna Carapellotti, MS CHt
Dance Mom
Hypnotherapist

Dear Sanna - random opportunities

The other day I noticed I hadn't blogged in a while, and there are new things going on here, but there was just nothing really all that exciting to share and I wasn't inspired. Well today I definitely got a healthy dose of drama for you all.

We have been rehearsing a mix of repertoire since we returned from our tour, and tomorrow we have a show of one of the ballets we started in the very beginning of the year. If you remember, I was really excited to be dancing one of the better roles in the ballet, and actually understudying the second-biggest role in the ballet. Well we had about a million shows of this, including a really intense week, performing twice on some days (which is really rare for this company). So if there was a chance of me performing the big role, I assumed it would've been on one of the double days to give first cast a rest. But it didn't happen, for whatever reason. Maybe I wasn't good enough or they didn't think about switching casts, or maybe it was just too complicated to try to replace my normal parts. So I figured I would never do it and kind of stopped paying too much attention, just rehearsing the variation sometimes for fun.

The other day the girl dancing the role, lets call her Erin, wasn't feeling great, so she asked if I wanted to rehearse the variation instead of her. The next day she didn't show up for rehearsal, but I had to jinx it and say there was no way she would miss the show Saturday. For some reason my confidence that she would perform did not even waver when Erin wasn't in class this morning (the show is tomorrow). So of course, the one time I do not even have an inkling of hope that I will dance, a ballet mistress comes in the middle of class and drags me into the small studio to watch the video and try to figure out what in the world I am doing for the million bajillion little entrances that I stopped learning months ago. Erin is apparently in the hospital, so tomorrow is show time.

On one hand, I used to barely even be able to get through the variation, and now I can do it. But that is not to say it is by any means good enough, and I have maybe done it a total of 5 times in the past 4 months, because we really haven't been working on this program. I also barely know these little entrances which involve a lot of acting and confidence - two things that really don't come naturally to me. But whatever happens happens - there's not so much I can do right now.

There were times I just wanted to cry today, but I will just have to trust myself and do my best. I hope I can sort of enjoy this opportunity, or at the very least learn something from this experience (and add this role to my resume!)

Wish me "merde"...

Janie

Dear Sanna - Staying in Shape... or not

Staying in shape during the tour was definitely a struggle. First of all, I never feel like I can work as well during class on stage as in the studio. The classes are shorter and designed to warm you up, not to improve on technique. Also there is usually less space, so I cannot repeat combinations in center like I normally do. And of course there are no mirrors.

The amount of work we do is also shorter than a normal day. Usually we have rehearsals for multiple pieces where we repeat things several times, a performance is just one run, with maybe a mark-through before. Just the amount of work we do is less, which means more free time sitting around, eating, and getting out of shape.

Sometimes there were gyms in the hotel, but often we arrived after it already closed and I was not about to wake up early to work out. There was also food for us EVERYWHERE. First there was free breakfast in the hotel, which I was usually hungry for the morning after a show, since it was usually too late for a real dinner after. Then we often stopped somewhere before going to the theater for lunch, where I normally ate again whether I was hungry or not because I was never sure when I would have another chance to eat. Then there was almost always a huge spread of food for the dancers at the theater, and honestly if there is food it is just hard for me to not have something. Especially when it is different from what we are used to in this country and I want to try interesting things.

So on this tour I definitely got a little out of shape. But it is interesting to see how my body responds to this kind of situation, and I did learn how to at least prepare myself for a performance on tour and not go too crazy with all the food. It was never completely out of hand, just not my normal habits. I feel relaxed knowing it's okay to get a little out of shape, and now that I am back in the country and back to the routine, I am already back to normal

Sanna at DEA this weekend!

Yes, I am thrilled to be vending at Dance Educators of Amercia's Pittsburgh Dance Competition this weekend. There are 300 plus dancers in competition over three days time.

I want to wish all of them the BEST of luck and love as they show their best stuff to the world!!!

I will be there selling my programs and my newest Coach In My Bag, a Performance MP3, strictly for performers.
It has 13 tracks of high steppin' performance conditioning programs and there are more to come.

It has a pep talk, a visualizaton program, a sleep audio, ways to de-stress, fast acting waqys to feels happy instantly when your days is crappy ... and the best is Performance Brilliance. This powerful journey takes you inside your mind where you strongest potential lives and inspires it! You meet four aspects of self to super charge your desire - Performance Brilliance.
I am so excited about this program. You toss it in your dance bag and there it is whenever you need it ... going to class, at night, during a break, at rehearsals, on the way home.

There are also additional tracks coming for which you can purchase for a small small price. (Hint: Stop Stress Eating!) Read about it here -- Tell me what you think!
http://www.mentalperformances.com/?section=coachinmybag

I am also interested in other issues with dancers. If you tell me an idea and I make a program, You can get an MP3 at a very reduced cost and I will dedicate it to you, anonymously if you wish. Send your idea to me at sanna@mentalperformances.com

Oh, yeah, If you come to visit me this weekend and say, Dance Mind, You will receive and automatic 20% off the purchase prices of Coach In My Bag!

I hope to see you there. It is gonna be Extraordinary!

Sanna Carapellotti, MS CHt
MentalPerformances.com

Dear Sanna - The Bus

I never spent so much time on a bus in my entire life as this tour. Starting with a 5-hour drive after getting off the loooong plane ride, there were few days without a 2-6 hour drive. Sometimes we traveled more than 12 hours. It was really a funny picture, too, since we dancers found some creative positions to sleep and sit. There were legs in the air all over the place, people lying in the aisles on the pilates mats many bought at target for $9.99, and watching somebody make their way from front to back or vice-versa was pretty funny since they had to do so without stepping on the people on the floor, climbing along the arm rests.

Unfortunately, it is difficult for me to read on the bus without getting sick, and I couldn't even really take advantage of the wi-fi for the same reason. So I tried to sleep sometime and also spoke with a lot of people I never really talked to much. It's funny but I actually improved a lot in the language of this country while we were abroad from talking with non-English speakers.

People also went a little crazy from these long drives. We were sore and stiff from sitting in the seats and often expected to perform just a few hours later. Sometimes I did some foot exercises, and stretched as well as I could in the seats, but it was difficult. There were fights over stopping more often for cigarette breaks or just a chance to stretch our legs, and some people just complained all the time.

It was definitely an experience. We saw a lot of beautiful scenery and some great landmarks from that bus. We even made friends with our bus driver, who stayed with us the entire trip and even learned a few words from the language of the company. But I think I can safely say I had enough driving to last me a while now.

Janie

Dear Sanna - Finally back!

Whew that was a long tour indeed! Fun, tiring, stressful, frustrating, amazing - I think I went through just about every emotion over this month. It is impossible to tell everything in just one post, so maybe I will try to post about each subject in segments.

First segment: Casting

So, in the typical fashion of this company, there was no such thing as casting, even after arriving to the first hotel. The next day we had class at this tiny studio nearby with extremely scary slippery wooden floors (which the company immediately coated with a thick layer of rosin) and planned to have a few rehearsals.

Well one of our principle male dancers told the director weeks before he was having pain in his foot, but everyone just ignored this. At this point, before the tour even began, he could not dance at all. So we spent this day replacing him and working out the parts which would be affected. If you remember, the part I always stress about is all about stamina, so I wasn't particularly happy about not having a chance to at least run it that day, since it had already been 2 days since my last rehearsal of it. They did, at least, tell us that my cast would be performing in the first show (the next day).

We ran it before the show, and I actually felt okay. Wheezing and completely out of breath, as usual, but I survived. Our next show after that was a few days later, and we somehow managed to find out that my cast would perform that show and the one after. The second of these two shows was one where a girl from the other cast (let's call her Amanda) had family and she asked if she could perform there. I also told the director that it didn't matter to me and Amanda really wanted this show, but the director said probably not because this was an important place where we were performing and Amanda and her partner might not be good enough. After that performance the director asked me if I had family in the audience. When I said no, the director replied "Oh I thought you did. You know Amanda had a lot of family here, why didn't you say so?" That was frustrating. But I think the director knew exactly what was going on and didn't cast Amanda on purpose.

The other cast performed the following day in the worst theater from the whole trip, and again in another small city. The third time they were supposed to perform, Amanda had pain in her foot and couldn't dance, so we all pushed and somehow my friend and original partner got to dance in her place. We were all really happy she could have at least one chance to dance it, although it must have been really hard, not having rehearsed in almost a month, and never having done it with Amanda's partner. She did well, though.

So in the end, I performed 9 of the 12 performances of this program (there were 3 other performances of a different program, so 15 altogether). I was happy I was trusted to dance in the end, as first cast, too! I was constantly corrected to have more confidence in my dancing, and sometimes they said it was better. It's hard to fake confidence, and even harder to really have it, for me, so even the slightest improvement makes me happy, and probably even helps with the problem itself.

Good to be back! More soon,

Janie

While Janie Travels ...

Wow, she is on one long tour here in the Western Hemisphere! I have not heard from her. I know she is on a bus, had breakdowns (the bus) and have been all over No America. She will have good stories when she returns and her usual style of sharing insight.

I thought I would share a client story with you. This dancer gave me permission to use her story as a way of showing how healing can occur 'energetically.' I will not mention her real name.

"Caitlin called for an appointment because no one was taking her dance seriously. She felt weak and scared while on stage, in class. Did not want to perform in an upcoming recital. She felt like her family did not really care if she danced or not. Their support was not very enthusiastic. No one ever asked her "How's dance?" When they attend recitals it is 'ho'hum."

Caitlin is 18, in HS and has been dancing for many years. She wants to pursue a professional career, is told she has talent, but needs to be more energetic and expressive.


We talked.

We shifted the focus toward discussing her family. Parents were still married. Mother was a dance major in college and never pursued a career. Went straight to marriage and family. Her Mother's sister was an apprentice to a popular photographer in the USA and never followed through after the apprentice. She was offered a job, yet withdrew and takes pictures at family events. Another Aunt is a painter, seriously depressed and has been suicidal.

What do you see here in this family system? Creative women who for some reason could not, or were not allowed to express themselves. (reason? Not sure)

Catlin always knew this, yet never tied it to her struggles. If she were to stand in her power she breaks the lineage, the flow. Women in this family stick together. They DO NOT express themselves. Is Caitlin does she risks not belonging and maintaining her sadness and fears,

Solution?

Caitlin lined up the women in front of her (I have footprints) and stood in front of each one. She said, "I dance. I choose to honor that you could not express yourself for whatever reason. I love you very much and I want you to wish me well in my dance. I dance and express myself for all of you." She moved from each women and said something similar to that.

We did a few other things for empowerment. Eliminated her fears and rebuild an experience to take to the stage,

She called two weeks later and said she wow'ed everyone. It was the first time she took herself seriously (BECAUSE she was following a tradition). She danced in all her glory. Free. Alive. Fun.

I believe that many performers do not reach their potential due to unconscious systems like the one above. The good news is that they are easy to shift. When you do, whew, the earth can move.

You might have already noticed how you take you life to the stage!
Thank you for being a fan of DANCE MIND.


Sanna
Mentalperformances.com

Janie is still away!

Hello Everyone,
Janie is still 'out of the country." I look forward to hearing of her travels when she returns. The company has traveled long and far.

With Janie's keen insights and inside information we can trust a fresh viewpoint and a look at what can go right and wrong while traveling.

I'm sure you are all in the thick of rehearsals for upcoming performances. Tell us how it is going for you?

Sanna Carapellotti, MS CHt
Dance Mom
Hypnotherapist
www.mentalperformances.com

Janie : On the road

I know you are on the road. I wish you and the company the best! This is a wonderful experience.

Meanwhile, I am going to put up here a quick stress reduction strategy that is on my new audio -- coming out in March.
Use it when you notice the feeling of stress and tell me what happens!!!

Finger Drop -
You can sit or stand for Finger Drop.

Gently rest your hand on or against your thigh. Raise only your pointer finger. Focus your eyes on an object or a shape in front of you. Breathe in and begin counting backwards slowly from 60 ... down to one ... with each number your finger falls every so slightly closer to the leg. When you say one ... your finger touches down and you relax.

Here read along and do it. Once you get it ... You got it.

You can count back by fives and eventually tens. The more you practice the easier it becomes and the faster you destress..

60 -- finger is raised and NOW Big breath in and out slowly. Remember your eyes are focused. 55. finger drops every so slightly. 50 ... breathe in and your eyes focus on something there in front of you.
45 -- it is so nice to relax.
40 - you are that important ...
35 - you deserve this time to yourself.
30 - breathing -- You will feel better very soon.
25 .. halfway there. you feel more relaxed.
20 - so nice ... let go a little more drop your shoulder. Keep your eyes focus.
15 your finger is getting closer to our leg ...
10 so very close to relaxation ....
5 ... ready to touch down and relax -
0. You Relax now. Take a big breath in . Blink your eyes a few times. Move your body around and step back into your life.

Let me know how this works for you. More to come...
Sanna Carapellotti, MS CHt
Dance Mom, Hypnotherapist
Mentalperformances.com

Dear Sanna - what a mess

We have a slew of important performances coming up VERY soon *squeal of excitement/nerves* and yesterday's rehearsal was a mess. First of all, a few people were out sick, which complicates corps and makes it difficult to correct things or see what is wrong, since there are either gaps or people filling in who don't necessarily know what they are doing.

Then, before rehearsal for the part I talk about all the time - the musical casting - the artistic director decided to tell the pseudo-anorexic girl (i think she is more generally sick in the head than anorexic) that she needs to keep her weight under control because she is too up and down all the time. The director didn't necessarily say loose weight, but any conversation with this dancer other than "you are too skinny" results in an explosion.

So she was crying in the dressing room during rehearsal. She is part of the other cast. My other half was sick. The remaining girl and myself do the same part (for the most part, since my other half changed everything around so we are sometimes like the other group, sometimes opposite, and sometimes so different you can't even call it opposite). So we couldn't even really rehearse together. So frustrating. I need these rehearsals, because this is one of the hardest things I've ever done stamina-wise, and I need to run it every day so I will have the stamina to get through. Also, I really don't know all the little acting parts, so it would be really nice if I could have a rehearsal to figure out what I'm doing. Grrr.

Anyway after the rehearsal I went in the small studio and sort of did the variation myself for stamina, and I plan to watch some videos today to try to get an idea of how the acting should be. This is what I can control, so I will do what I can, and hope everything out of my control falls into place. Hopefully everyone recovers over the weekend and we can really utilize our last week to prepare!

Janie

Janie, Being instructed.

Your last post was very clear.

It speaks about how you respond to instruction and direction. Your confidence when performing is dependent on how well rehearsed you feel (that varies from one to another). Letting go of the training mind (Learning) comes when you trust that your body mind are 'intelligent' of the choreography. You do not THINK while dancing.

You describe a very dynamic director who is knowledgeable and sensitive to the needs of HOW a dancer learns choreography.
From what I hear from other performers, it is so exciting to be taught by such individuals as they are true professionals. They realize that teaching the choreography comes with responsibility of guidance with 'personality' out of the way. It is truly the duty of an instructor to 'study' how they can be more effective as instructors.

Dancing and teaching are different, aren't they? There is an art to both.

AGAIN, Janie, ask yourself, "What do I have control over?" Role changes are political and practical based on the subjective needs of the instructor, the company, directors and the choreography. NEVER CLING or hold on to a part. You have experienced and witnessed how sweeping changes can occur from one day to the next.

How does one do that? First and foremost, you have to agree, that what you have now may change in some way. Agreeing allows you to be present with your current status, even in the face of a change.

Practice being flexible in mind and body. Is it fair? No,probably not, yet that is the nature of the beast whether you are on stage or corporate.

HOW TO PRACTICE BETTER WHEN THE INSTRUCTOR IS NOT SO THOROUGH.
1. Visualize. (I have a new program coming out to help with this. I recorded yesterday)
2. Stay calm in the midst of change. Use breath.
3. DO NOT engage in drama. Use this blog or a journal and let it go. When you have your company, then you WILL be more sensitive and apply what you have learned.
4. Talk to the teachers about what works. (How is it that instructors are unapproachable? What is the fear? There are clear boundaries after a certain level and age, when no one is 'allowed' to address teaching/studio issues. You know it could help and offer food for thought.

Dear Sanna - Direction at last!!

The ballet master I spoke of finally returned!!! I was anxiously awaiting this, but I was also nervous about the reaction to how we have improved (or not) over the last few months. Also with our current ballet, I was almost embarrassed to show it to this ballet master, having worked on it only with much less strict teachers.

But the second the ballet master returned I was immediately happier. Finally, the rehearsals for the part that stresses me out most now have meaning. We stop when something is bad or not together and actually work out why it's bad and how to fix it, rather than the rehearsal director just screaming while we dance and try to think and miss half of the corrections. And we also work on stamina, because we stop and start and work, but also repeat and redo and go again from the beginning, which is much more useful in order to improve, and ends up building even more stamina than just a straight run.

Not that everything is puppies and rainbows. Today after rehearsal there was a really long discussion between the director and all the ballet masters in the front of the studio while us dancers stood around like nervous auditioners. Nobody had any idea what they were talking about, and then one of the ballet masters started speaking to my opposite in a language I don't understand. She sounded annoyed with a "so-what?" answer and then told me she thinks we're done rehearsing and left. The rest of us were completely bewildered.

Later I heard a rumor that my opposite possibly will dance another part (it's actually better), so if she does then somebody else will have to replace her and dance with me. What I don't understand is why second cast won't go in while my partner does the other part, and we will dance together as planned. The whole thing sounds fishy to me, and I am worried that I will suffer in the end, since I now do the part the way my opposite does, which has many small but important differences to second cast. I am not getting worked up about it just yet, but I hope they will tell us what's going on soon.

Janie

Janie, Your face.

Pieces have moods and story lines. Your intuition can be your guide. Or maybe you can read up on the ballet. Or better yet, ask the director.  

It would be very respectful to watch the performing dancer, unless there is something else going on in the piece. 

Things I have witnessed are: being disengaged, yawning, frowns, HUGe smiles when someone comes on stage, eyes down cast, laughing with neighbor, shaking feet. AND connectedness, engagement, expression changes that integrated with what was happening, eye contact with dancer and /or audience, excitement, beautiful form and position.

If you do not have a resource to ask, get a discussion going among your peers.

Watch other performances. You'll connect with what feels in sync. Just notice with out judgement or comment.

Janie : I agree

I hope instructors recognize this finishing piece. With all they have to do and manage, I can understand how it could be overlooked. Yet it makes a difference. that connectedness and cohesiveness brings us back for more.

Thank you, Nichelle for your kind responses. it is always good to get great Dance Minds on board. 

Sanna Mentalperformances.com

MentalPerformances.com

P.S. If you want a great performance, you gotta sleep. Stepping to Sleep audio recommended by Dance Magazine. (Buy it here)

Dear Sanna - Missing "unconsciousness"

Your last post describes exactly what our company is missing. Nobody tells the corps de ballet exactly how each step should be, with specific arms, heads, feet, let alone how we should look or feel in certain moments. Especially since our strongest ballet mistress has been out of town for the last 3 months. Thank goodness she is finally returning next week. We all noticed this lack of direction and chaos among the corps while she is not here. Even when she is, the company is such a mess of free-spirits, it's still hard for all these different cultures to come together to look like one cohesive group.

I saw an amazing performance last night of a dance theater group. It was more contemporary dance with a lot of acting in the movements. There was so much personality and care put into each step. I loved the way they used their faces, and it really made me wish I knew what to do with my face when I dance. It is not a natural thing for me, and I either find myself naturally making ugly or expressionless faces, or I am self-conscious about it and just looking awkward. This is my biggest challenge, I think.

Today in rehearsal I exploded. Did I mention in the part my friend was taken out of, I actually had to switch sides because the other girl used to do my part, and since she is higher up of course she gets whatever she wants, so I have to change. This is normal for me, I believe in respect for seniority, but it is still annoying. It is also uncomfortable now for a little while I get used to my new spot. There are also a lot of things my opposite is very stubborn about that she does differently than we learned, which I need to change. But she is not that clear about it and gets confused or annoyed or just has to turn it into a big deal every time I ask for clarification. And sometimes while we're dancing I notice different things than what she said or she screams at me, along with the ballet mistress in a language I am not exactly fluent in.

So today I was trying so hard to remember all the corrections, dance nicely, not look like I want to kill someone, and listen to 3 different people around me screaming different things. And the artistic director was watching. When we got to the end I was dying (as usual because it is a very difficult variation) and the ballet mistress was screaming head and I thought I was using my head and I didn't know how to change it and my opposite was screaming at me about spacing and my partner was screaming something else about spacing and I was trying to just finish and I just could not continue with about 8 counts left I was so mad and tired and frustrated. It was so embarrassing and I was on the verge of tears while I had my partner translate to the teacher that I just can't listen to everyone's corrections and try to remember the previous ones and dance all at once and I am so tired and I'm trying my best. So she said "well it's too late for corrections now" and walked away. I don't even know what that means. She can't correct me after the variation? Or I blew it when I stopped? I have no idea but it was horrible. I need to figure out how to work with this woman.

Janie

From the Audience Eyes!

As a member of the audience, dance mom and energy therapist,  when I attend a performance I am looking around and taking in all I can from the production, not merely focusing on what's happening up front and center. I feel the color of the costumes, the props and backdrops.

To me, there is a symphony of events on stage that create a complete experience and feel that we as audience members demand.  

And then something shifts ...

Oft times dancers are posed in the background or sitting beautifully as 'people props.' They may be sitting, standing, in a position and there is very little movement as the soloist/leads dance. When  core is posed, you/I can feel if they are in sync with each other and what is happening up front, or disconnected. I am referring to a sense of togetherness, not just in movement and rhythm, but in spirit.  This is often referred to as 'being unconscious.' Inseparable. One.

Core is positioned to support an aspect of the story line that may not always be apparent, especially if there is incongruency among individual facial expressions, meaning, one is smiling because they are friendly with a certain soloist and then another  enters that they know less and they look away. Or they are distant and moody, or flirty and playful with the dancer beside them.  How they are 'being' is out of sync with what needs to happen  within the piece.

Their purpose becomes lost really and does not offer the support to the movement, the choreographer, the music, the dancer, and so on. 

Here is what I would liken it to ... Congruency is when everyone is one the same page. There is a natural movement, a cohesiveness, a energetic bubble among all. It would be like having coffee with a group of your best friends and you all talk and chat together without interruption. You feel connected. You have felt that.

Incongruent is scattered and chaotic. Moods and personalities rule. Affections are selective, maybe. Like this - You are having coffee with  a group of folks and conversation is disjointed, on and off, awkward. You could care less. You have felt this.

Informing core dancers to assume a certain facial expression, posture (not the actual position) and emotional energy, to emotionally move with, or maybe it must be against, the soloist/lead, ignites the performance. Everyone is truly one and everybody feels it. It's beautiful.

It's why I go to performances and you dance.

Tell core members how to 'BE'  as supporting cast. 

Sanna Carapellotti, MS CHt

Therapist, Dance Mom, Patron of the Arts

mentalperformances.com

Janie: All in a day

As a non dancer I am looking in from the outside. (Remember me the accordian player from a long line of Italian musicians. ) 

It is  game like, isn't it. I don't know why casting plays out as you describe, yet it seems to be common from what I hear in conversations with teachers who are frustrated, from dancers who feel uncertain and from parents who need to know. 

One might imagine that higher ups would want you to be as prepared and ready to perform. Knowing your piece, responsibilities can create certainty and uplift a performance. 

Understandably people's capabilities change and one can certainly change their mind, however, it may be a symptom of something else.

Everyone knows. I am sure the creative director and owners know of this confusion. (as they may have experienced it first hand). Yet it continues.

Of course it is difficult for your friend, especially when one holds the firm expectation of dancing THAT part. Given the common approach to role assignments, you may want to revisit how you emotionally move through casting. Flexible and looser?

If you were in her pointe shoes you would not see or feel about you as you believed she thought about you. (Huh?) In these touchy situations jump shoes and look from another's perspective it can help you 1. know how to respond. 2. get a clearer picture to stop the emotional rush, 3. resolve it.

Get used to these shuffles. You'll feel less stressed since it appears to be a part of the beasty side of dance.  

The question might be: Who dareth to tell the artistic director to be more decisive?

Sanna

Hypnotherapist

Mentalperformances.com

P.S. THANK YOU anonymous! I love hearing from you! I really appreciate your feedback.

Dear Sanna - Awkward

We had an extremely random rehearsal today. It was for a ballet we did at the beginning of the year a few times, haven't done for months, and will do a LOT in a few months. It is the same one where I really don't do much, but was "second cast" for a part I really wanted. This is the one where I need to be really together with my opposite, etc. It seemed like we were a solid second cast who would probably never perform, but we weren't so sure.

Then this rehearsal happened the other day. First of all, the dancer who I replaced in a few ballets this year returned a few weeks ago. Nobody is quite sure what this means. Maybe she will take back all her old parts, and the other dancers and I will be kicked out of our spots. Only time will tell. In this case a few of us guessed that she and another higher ranking dancer in the company would step into this part, bumping first cast down, and kicking me and my friend out of second cast. So when the higher ranking soloist came to me and asked if I heard she was doing the part, I was disappointed. Until she explained that we were doing it together. But that means my very good friend who I used to dance with was taken out, and I knew this would crush her. So I couldn't even be happy. I just felt horrible.

They didn't even have the decency to tell us properly. Everyone had to find out through someone else, nobody exactly sure what was happening and why. My friend cried a lot, and I felt helpless. I was afraid to even try to comfort her, because maybe she just really didn't want to see me at this point.

Of course later when she was a little better, she told me of course it's not my fault and she's not mad at me, and I know it's not, but it's still such a hard position to be in, and also really new for me. I am much more used to being on the other side, usually faking happiness.

Anyway on the bright side the director still likes me enough to place me with this other dancer in the part I really wanted! (Did I mention we are first cast and the original first cast is now second?) I am not counting on it, but hopefully it will last and I can really work on this part and learn to enjoy this ballet for once!

Janie

Attention Performers Who Stress Eat.

You are invited to attend The Golden Fork, an extraordinary eating experience designed to STOP stress eating. This Five Step Solution makes returning to the table easier and increases your love for food and eating again.

the feeling of being unsatisfied is partly due to the stress, fast eating that is bad news for the digestive tract, health and stress. You can slow down.

If you eat too much, inahle the wrong foods, or eat a certain food too much this class will help you to increase your awareness for what your body, mind and heart needs. Do you know there are seven kinds of hunger? They do not need to be satisfied with food?

Anxiety about performing sends many performers to the sugar cookies, or causes them to eat too much or not enough. This seminar teaches how to be satisfied with a less, especially during performance season. (This is not a treatment program for eating disorders.)
Read more about it here. (on-line seminar available soon.) Email me if you are interested in information. This class is held in Pittsburgh,PA in Jan. 2010.

http://www.mentalperformances.com/?section=mindful_eating_practice

Sanna Carapellotti, MS CHt
Your Performance Coach.

Happy Holidays!

Wishing you a Merry Christmas, Happy New Year and lots of good rest !

Love you all,

Sanna

Dear Sanna - dancing alone

This is a very busy performance time for me. I have shows every day this week, sometimes more than one each day, but I love it. It's nice to get into the swing of things and perform the same show for a while, as opposed to our usual random shows of various programs. I was a bit nervous for the first show, but since I am understudying a major role, in reality I am not dancing THAT much, although I still have a nice part.

Anyway my partner for one section happens to be the one guy in the show who switches, since when he is not dancing with me he is doing the principle role, so I basically have half the amount of rehearsals with each partner. Unfortunately, this can be confusing, especially when the guy who danced the principle role the first show had to dance with me for the second show without ever getting a run-through. Something was bound to go wrong, and it did when I did a pirouette and realized my partner was not there to catch me. I landed okay and improvised a little pose while everyone around me went into a shoulder sit and continued with the rest of the dance. It was a little embarrassing, but I am not really upset about it, especially because I have a soft spot for the guy who left me. Oh and I forgot to mention in the same show, a different partner had me completely off my leg to the point I had to whisper to him left! left! in the middle of the stage. So embarrassing. A great show for me really. But amazingly instead of the typical hysterical reaction from the director, telling me I need to hold myself or just generally being mad about things going wrong, I actually was praised on my professional way of handling the situation, and my partners didn't get it too bad either. It was my lucky day, apart from the fact that my partners tipped me over and forgot about me.

Janie

Holiday Disciplines - Hi, Tom,

I agree with you. I was wondering the same thing! However, magazines set their editorial calendar based on what they think is best. The magazine article should be out very soon.

Do you have any specific questions? There are many ways to manage. I can address your specific question, or situation and speak in general terms.

Thank you for your comment! I appreciate it!

Sanna

Raising the Barre on Your Attitude

Read my most recent article in DANCER Magazine:

Raising the Barre On Your Attitude!

Written by your truly in the November issue.

There is a lively discussion about how Instructors can read your mind, how to 'read' yourself better in the studio and two exercises for you to directly witness how the body does not lie.

Check it out - HERE!

Happy Nutcrackering!

Sanna Carapellotti, MS CHt

Mentalperformances.com

PS - You do not want to miss next months issue where I interview three dancers about how they discipline themselves through the holidays. I was impressed by their strength! By the way, I am always looking for dancers to interview. If you are interested, let me know and I will consider you for future articles, or events. Sanna@mentalperformances.com

Dear Sanna - understudying

I think I mentioned at the very beginning of the year that I had the honor of understudying one of the leading roles in the ballet we are, actually just now, about to perform. Well a lot has happened since then. The first cast of this role was changed for a different role, and another dancer became the first cast. Nobody mentioned me, but I assumed I was still the understudy.

It is very strange though, because I'm not even sure there have been more than 2 scheduled rehearsals for this part, and one of them literally said "learn from the video in the small studio," so even the girl who will dance the role is barely rehearsed. Often times, she will run the variation or watch the video or rehearse on her own time, which is good, but I feel weird about asking for my own private rehearsals, and they almost never tell me when she is going to practice.

So I find myself just watching her all day, and throwing on my pointe shoes to practice in the back behind her every time she works on something. In general I just feel stupid, but also it is my responsibility to learn this, first of all in case something should happen to the first cast and I have to go in, but second of all for my own good in case I am miraculously asked to dance the role. It would be a shame for the artistic director to actually cast me and then I can't perform because I don't know the part or didn't rehearse it well.

But I decided to stop being upset about this, and see it as a learning experience for myself. Chances are I won't perform this part, but I am going to appreciate the fact that I even have to opportunity to learn it (above any of the other girls who could be understudies), and work to dance the best I can, and if I am ever given the chance I will have done everything I could, and if not this time, I can get a lot out of learning this choreography and character. Every time I dance I can learn a little more about myself and improve.

Janie: Watch Me -

Janie and everyone who reads this,

Look in the mirror and love yourself.  You can't be perfect (unless you are photoshopped!) Do the best you can whether you are in the core, or lead, and anywhere in between. It doesn't matter where you stand. Put yourself out there as if you are performing through every show the last time for your life.  

Free your inner dancer ~   

Every performance is your opportunity to get better and better, to grow more certain and to do what you love.  Take that part of your to the stage.  The more you love yourself, the stronger you are through the highs and lows of performing. You keep dancing until you decide to stop. You know how hard you can work and what is demanded. Watch those ahead of you who are stars. Learn from them and how they work. Take "KNOW" for an answer.

Be excellent. As the curtain goes down, you can raise your arms high to say you did it. Someone is watching.

My besr to all of you through Nutcrackers and Winter performances.

I LOVE YOU ALL for making me smile, laugh and cry ...

Sanna Carapellotti, MS CHt

Dance Mom, Performance Coach and Therapist

Mentalperformances.com

Performance Stress - All in a Day!

In talking with many dancers over the years, I repeatedly hear that the instructors who were/are firm and supportive are the instructors who are cherished and remembered as being instrumental in their success.  Learning to motivate students is an art form.  

If instructors could see themselves in action, perhaps they might consider other teaching strategies. (This is not about technique but how they teach.) 

We gravitate toward the familiar and what we know when we choose a mate and parent. Studio intimacy sets in motion those same dynamics. How they were taught and treated certainly influences and can develop teaching styles, unless they consciously decided otherwise. 

Does ballet training require harshness? What is your opinion as a student?

I have been told by many instructors how they wish they had learned what I teach their students when they were learning and dancing.  This speaks volumes of the need for mental skills training for dancers. You can dance better and stronger when you use specifically designed strategies to assist with learning, coping and readiness. They are fast and easy,

Do you know there are techniques for shielding oneself from harsh critical teachers? (It's in the Audition Audio Program.) It is not disrespectful in any way. It is an technique that enables you to hear what you are being told and separating out what is rightfully not yours - The anger!

Love to you all ~  

Sanna 

Performance Coach and Therapist

Mentalperformances.com

Dear Sanna - teachers...

Maybe ballet masters do forget what it was like to dance. They can be so cruel and unforgiving, screaming at us and undermining our confidence just before a show. And sometimes I think they stuck in the past, feeling nobody can dance the role as good as they once did. One of our ballet masters constantly tells us we need to do it exactly the way she did it, even if artistically it could be done different ways and still be beautiful or right. She gets so caught up in correcting us and showing it how it should be done, she doesn't even watch when we try to fix something or understand. It is so frustrating, and people are really starting to ignore what she says, even though sometimes what she says could be useful.

We are now doing our biggest production of the year, in a huge opera house with guest soloists. We rarely perform in such a big theater with such impressive sets and costumes. It is interesting, because I feel smaller and less important even though the production is more like that of a bigger, more important company. But it's still fun. I think I could enjoy being a small dancer in a large company as well as how I enjoy dancing here as a (sort of) bigger dancer in a small company.

The music for the piece we are dancing is really beautiful, and I am just having a good time dancing in such a great theater and watching the soloists and dancing a little myself. It's been a good week.

Janie

DanceMind- That First Ballet Slipper

Reminiscing - 

Do you remember the first time you slipped your foot into a ballet slipper and stood high on your toes?  

Sanna

Instructors Forget or Believe Something Else

When an Instructor says, "There is no performance anxiety in my class," what are they really saying?

* I am not in touch with my students.

* I choose to forget about my personal experiences when I danced.

* I do not understand the concept of performance anxiety. 

*I do not have time to listen.

* I don't know how to handle it, so I pretend it does not exist.

Often times I hear a resignation from instructors, "There is nothing one can do about it. You suck it up."

Students don't usually tell their Instructor about the knot in their stomach or how they cry at night or how afraid they are of their part or how they worry and worry.  Performers I work with privately do not tell, is this common? Maybe you all talk amongst yourselves about your worries and fears.

How much a part of performance is fear before it causes errors and mistakes? (Stress does that. Focus does that, too.)

Can these states of mind be explored? (Maybe not if one believes a can of worms is being opened)

Do we resign to dance less than who we are on stage when we are full of worry? (Can go either way. Also takes away from emotion.)

When are we accountable for how well we do? Do we say, "I excuse myself because I was nervous? We then associate anxiety -> worry during performance -> error - > more worry about performance.(Then we can work to resolve it, talk about it or seek help) Not a good 

Isn't it our responsibility to take our best selves to the stage? (Yes. We learn techniques of dance and for mind.)

Of course not every one needs to "see a therapist" or "hire a coach" (but they can be helpful). 

However, a kind supportive word, such as "You can."  "YES." can make the world of difference to empower that gnawing fear or shaking anxiety into a moment of greatness.

Yes.       You can.

I believe in each and every one of you.

Anxiety an be a good thing, when used to advantage. Your shaking knees are ready to move ...

Sanna Carapellotti, MS CHt

Dance Mom

Your Hypno-Therapist

Performance Coach

Mentalperformances.com

P.S. Instructors are doing the best they can too even when they worry - quietly.

DanceMind- Dear Janie, New Experiences

Hello Janie, Your season is in full swing! Already there are many changes and challenges.

Partnering is a art, isn't it?  If you remember your previous partners, you discover that each one has a different way of connecting with you. There is nothing more beautiful or sensual then watching a couple so in sync on stage. It is magnetic, so powerful. They know they are connected and project it out into the audience. Everyone is 'moved.'

Last year I worked with a couple who were dancers together and also boyfr and girlfr. They were looking to improve their dancing together on stage as they seemed to always be paired together. They would fight and then attempt to smile through it. Doesn't work. The audience can see through that thin veil.

Here is what we did -- We talked about each ones viewpoint and perspective. What did they each believe about partnering.  SHELLY (false name) felt smothered and stiff in his company and wanted to feel safe and cared for so she can perform her role. She wanted to let go and trust him.

Henry (False name) believed he was to be strong and dominating (See what's happening here?).

And felt uncertain. He wanted to be that source for her to shine. 

So we processed it out and they then came up with a word/phrase that each wanted to project in their performance ... one separately and then a phrase that described how they would BE together.  Then they sat every day and visualized their performance together. They got to the point where they could sense each others visualization.

When they performed they rec'd a standing ovation it was so powerful. Now they really PARTNER together.

See if your partner would talk it out with you. I don't think this happens enough. Some men are naturally gifted at partnering and creating that freedom for women.

-------------------------------------------

Janie, I am wondering if the stress you are feeling about  that piece you mentioned is actually stress. Could it be that you are challenged to keep your focus and attention strong?  You will respond differently if you reframe the tension.

What could it be for you?

How exciting to wear a pretty tutu? Be glamorous and beautiful!!!!

-------------------------------------------

CONFIDENCE: If you rely on external events and comments for confidence then it does become reliant on who says what (even if it is negative).  YOU are in charge of this confidence.

Listen to track 6 on the Audition CD for several days. You will learn how to stack experiences. and then Audition Excellence to set the inner stage.  If you want confidence it comes with the repetition of believing you are. You are, sometimes, right? It is just a thought.

Sanna Carapellotti, MS CHt

Dance Mom

Therapist

Performance Coach

Dear Sanna - Bad Medicine

There is a ballet we did all last year, which I frankly do not like at all. It's actually a classical ballet, so at least it's not some creepy modern thing or bad choreography by the director, but there's a lot of character acting involved, and it's just really not my thing. Especially because I barely do anything since it was casted when I was very new in the company.

This year I at least get to dance a nice part I wasn't in last year (in a pretty tutu!), which helps, but it's very short and kind of stressful. The part I really have my eye on, I actually am second cast, which is encouraging, but it's not at all clear if second cast will ever do it. We have actually been trying to rehearse ourselves (there are two girls in each cast) whenever we get the chance and ask other dancers for help, because the teachers aren't really that concerned with the part at all, let alone second cast. But if they would think about it, it's really smart to have two casts because we will take this ballet on tour where there are shows every day, and it will be extremely tiring for one cast. They have actually mentioned switching, they just aren't that active about it.

It's really interesting because my partner and I are very different dancers. Different bodies, different schooling, different thought process, and we have to dance together and look the same. And without proper rehearsal, this is even more difficult. We are working very hard together to get it right. My bad medicine is to really push and be flirty and aggressive, while my opposite has to concentrate on making nice lines. It's really interesting to see the different ways we work, and I think this will be a good learning experience for both of us as dancers.

Janie

P.S. Sorry about the language!

DanceMind : Language, Janie ...

Hello, there kiddo,
I did make a change of THAT word. We have many young readers and even though it would be accurate and honest to tell the whole story correctly, sometimes we need to leave out the 'descriptives.' Thanks for telling about your experience.

Sanna Carapellotti, MS CHt
DanceMom
Hypno-Therapist
Performance Coach

Dear Sanna - Confidence

It's such a funny thing, what can affect my level of confidence. I felt great this week. Much more relaxed, excited but under control. It was like the first performance was the equivalent of those nerves I always feel right before I go on stage, and then once I'm out there the feeling disappears. Each show after the first I became more and more relaxed. The director was happy after each show, always saying it was better than the day before. Every day I was told that I don't use the corrections I am given (which are not THAT specific or clear might I add, like "attack it more!" or "use your head!"), but I think this is partially the director's way of keeping a running communication with me. Sometimes I know that I followed corrections (like be more stage left) and I still get the same correction the next day, even when I know I OVERcorrected the problem. So I think this is just the director's way of communication and it's okay.

A stage worker actually told me the other day (excuse the language, but this is a direct quote) "F*****' A", which I must say is probably one of the best compliments I ever got. It was after dancing in the new part I'm always talking/stressing about. In this specific section, I dance with a partner and another couple, the other girl being the prima ballerina of the company. It is amazing that somebody could compliment me on this part, dancing next to such a mature, beautiful dancer who I admire so much.

And lately this week, it's as if people know about my confidence problem and are trying to help me, because I just keep hearing more and more nice little things that brighten my day. I can't exactly describe it, but just these stupid little compliments or even a smile from somebody can completely lift my mood.

Here's hoping to more great weeks like this :) Happy Halloween!

Janie

DanceMind:DEAR JANIE:Body Image

We must love our bodies.

Beauty, shape and size tend to be associated with external factors, success as, lead parts, fitting into a certain costume that someone very thin wore, or how much money we make, or the friends we have.  You MUST REALIZE that pitting yourself against those factors WHiCH ARE TEMPORARY create us to lose our ground as they pass. You will always search for something to define yourself, to compare yourself to, align with outside of yourself. 

Have you noticed that you will never measure up and sometimes you feel good and then your lose your reference point?  External references keep you sad, depressed and confused about your true value and worth.  If  YOU BELIEVE you are wrinkly, thick thighed or thin lipped then your definition of yourself focuses on a physical attribute and eliminates the qualities you have.

Notice the inner dialogue you have about your body? How much does it define how you feel? Alone? or socially (walking across the studio?) 

Sanna Carapellotti, MS CHt

DanceMom

Therapist

Performance Coach

WATCH THIS VIDEO TO SEE HOW WE ARE DUPED.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pcFlxSlOKNI

Sorry - I forgot to LINK it.

Ask yourself - What is real?

Sanna 

DanceMom

Therapist

Performance Coach

P.S.   I put the Rest in your Sleep.   Stepping to Sleep for dancers. Recommended by Dance Mag.

FIND YOUR BEAUTY

It is up to your to shine your light from the inside out. I know it is quirky, but true.

Dance is tough on mind and body. Dealing with negative critical people is one aspect of performance. Some people will NEVER like your performance style, your body shape, your hair color .... and on and on. The more you step into the spot light the bigger your imperfections become (look at some of todays stars, family members, friends, politicians, other human beings). Mostly because what we look at daily is an illusion created by a computer. 

Ever heard of a Troll. They are critics. They seek to demean and criticize AND GAIN PLEASURE FROM IT. 

A. critics will always be criticizing 
B. They rarely are creative other than with their words and comments
C. You must ignore them, otherwise YOUR INNER voice echoes them.'

Are you a troll of yourself?

Sanna Carapellotti, MS CHt

DanceMom. Therapist. Performance Coach.

http://www.mentalperformances.com

Dance Mind

I need help. I have a dynamic woman I am going to set an audio interview with for dancers. She talks about these issues of body love and hate. WHAT WOULD BE A GOOD TIME?
9:00 PM? 8:30PM ? You can listen in and it will also be recorded.

I am working on this for you all so you can heal this part of you that does not live fully in your body, within yourself. ANY negativity drains your life force and creativity. No matter who says what or who does anything, you are and must be in control of what you believe about yourself.

Back to you ... Email me directly if you want to talk on the program about dancers and body image.
sanna@mentalperformances.com. I will also be asking for YOUR QUESTIONS>

Dear Sanna - Not nervous, excited!

How could I forget the lessons I learned last year? These knots in my stomach I've been feeling all week are exactly the excitement I was asking for. I hate performing without feeling, so I need to regard this not negatively as "nervous", but in a positive way as excitement. I am happy and ready for a chance to dance on stage and really perform. It will be fun! No matter what happens, I am getting to do what I love on stage.

The more I enjoy every moment, the more it shows in my dancing, and the less I sabotage myself by over-thinking the steps.

As for loving myself unconditionally, I understand that this would improve my dancing, and I wish I could just turn on or off self-confidence. But that's what makes it so hard. I can't just say I love myself unconditionally and make it happen. Maybe I will learn to, but in the mean time I am just trying to focus on the positive.

Also, I think a funny exercise I made up for myself is helping. If I feel self-conscious or see somebody watching me, I focus completely on them, instead of trying to ignore it. Almost just like the nerves, I try to use their once distracting looks as support while I dance. If I just stare back, I can dance through it. If I try to pretend I don't see them, I lose my focus.

Interesting how many things go through my mind while I dance.

Janie

DanceMind:DEAR JANIE:Body Image

Question: What if I told you that if you loved yourself unconditionally your dancing would improve? What would you respond?

Sanna Carapellotti, MS CHt

Dance Mom

Therapist

Performance Coach

Dear Janie:

Hi there, This is a good topic to process through. I am in a training until tomorrow. I will sign on Monday and teach you about confidence!

Much love to you all!
Sanna

Dear Sanna - so self-conscious!

I think I am generally an under-confident person, but sometimes it gets really bad. Today we were rehearsing the ballet I stepped into this year to replace the principle who left. My solo is very slow and there is a lot of music for me to fill with not so many steps. Also, I was never really properly taught the part, so it's even harder because I don't really know exactly how each movement should be. I feel really embarrassed every time I do this solo, even if the rest of the ballet is getting better.

Today after I did the solo the artistic director pulled me over and told me I look like a shy, embarrassed girl and I have no confidence (only because it's true). The thing is, I hear corrections like this all the time, but if I could just change it I would, so this correction in itself is not all that helpful. If I knew how to dance with even a fake air of confidence, of course I would. Anyway today for the first time, the director did not just stop at this criticism, but instead had me show her what I do, and gave me specific things to change and work on. I think it helped a lot, but still in the end she had me go back and do it again, and this time I was sure everyone was watching, so I felt even more embarrassed. I am trying to use my imagination to get over it, but I just feel the eyes on me.

When will I feel comfortable in my own skin? At times I can't even cross the room without feeling the eyes watching me.

Janie

Janie

Looking for a MALE dancer to interview

for an upcoming article on topic of managing the holidays. Please contact me sanna@mentalperformances.com

Sanna Carapellotti, MS, CHt

Dance Mom

Therapist

Performance Coach

DanceMind:DEAR JANIE

In our meetings with people who are in our lives every day, we do not always know what offerings they have for us. We judge and sneer at what we observer because we believe we know them, although what we see and observe is a short time period out of their lives. 

Class clown was helpful and kind and observant. Although his behaviors are not to your liking and his interactions may be immature and intrusive,  he may be your partner in the future or he may do something thoughtful as he did or it is revealed why he behaves as he does.

Especially in a company setting, where contact is up close and very physical, you want to be as flexible of someone else's behavior as you can.  LOOK for the nice things he does. Otherwise you will always SEE the annoyances and they become WHAT YOU LOOK FOR. We then do not see anything else. Shift the focus to WHAT else he does in and out of class. Annoyances - and goodness knows we all have those!

Sanna Carapellotti
Dance Mom
Therapist
Performance Coach

Ps - Visit - Mentalperformances.com

Dear Sanna - that other thing...

I'm not sure exactly what that other thing you have in mind is, but maybe it has something to do with having the patients and wisdom that I will heal and recover from injuries? It is easy to freak out and get caught up in an injury. It feels like your body will never be the same. But with time and rest and a little care, things do heal and improve. I appreciate the help of my coworkers and the massage therapist, and together with my own actions I think the injury improved. It just goes to show how very important it is to take care of your body.

DanceMind:Dear Janie - Something else?

What is the other lesson here?

Dear Sanna - here i am!

Finally back on the blog!

So there is this guy in company who usually gives me (and everyone) a really hard time. He is basically the class clown, and he loves to make fun of people, and can be really entertaining but also really annoying. Anyway after that horrible week with my back and everything, he made a comment to me about not finishing class (something I really rarely do), so I told him my back was really hurting me. So he was the one who actually asked the company's physical therapist to work with me that day.

It didn't really feel better, but he kept helping me each day after, with the clown's encouragement (and annoying jokes). A friend also suggested I take a hot bath which also helped a lot. Now I can do almost everything in class again, and it is much better, even though it's not perfect. It reminded me how careful I need to be with my body, and how important it is to practice good posture all the time. I am also doing abdominal exercises every day now, something I never used to do.

I also really appreciate being able to finish a class now. It reminds me how much I love dancing when I can't do it as freely as I am used to for a period of time. It's crazy how much I can enjoy what some people could say is the most boring part of my job! I am so lucky :)

Janie

Fun exercise: PLAY

1. Pull down a movie screen in front of you .... Remember when you first discovered ballet. The slippers, tutu's, wands ... or the joy of the movement. You leaped and twirled. Reached for the sky.  Remember and watch the joy.

    Wrap your young self in a beautiful aura of passion and light.

2. Watching your young self dancing and dancing and dancing.

3. Next, step into the movie screen and dance with her. Allow the aura to surround both of you.

4. Dance with your young self.  NEXT, become her, switch into her little body... watching how         you have grown up! Dancing through her eyes.

5. See her. Feel her beautiful love. (or him). Dance.

6. Close your eyes and dance. Close a fist and feel those feelings of love. Breathe.

7. ANYTIME you want to feel that connection. Close your fist and breathe and remember!

Sanna Carapellotti, MS CHt

Therapist and Performance Coach

Mentalperformances.com

Thought Patterns

What do you THINK (or say to yourself) about your dancing ability?

Is it negative and harsh, or do you support your efforts with words of compassion and strength that move you forward.

 Say, YES, to your desires.

1 minute motivation

http://www.facebook.com/video/video.php?v=198400150523

You can do it!

Dear Janie: STRESS!!!!

Yes, you had quite a week. Stressing through errands and government processes can leave its toll on the body and mind.  How related do you think your back pain was to the fatigue and worry through each day? There seems to have been an accumulate effect.

 

Stress is not ABOUT THE EVENT, but about the value and meaning you attach to it. It is looking through your own eyes (not any one else's) at the event or situation. Granted you had a couple of long days with surprises (test taking) and unplanned situations (dead cell phone.)  

*In my opinion, you  might consider carrying and extra charger in your dance bag and plug it in at the studio, if you think you can. Especially in a foreign country running errands alone, you want to have the ability to contact someone. Yet, I am sure someone in a store front would help you if went in and asked providing you can speak the language. We forget that cell phones keep us connected in a new way and we can still talk with people face to face.

I guess that your back pain was due to the burden of the stress. The body holds stress like the earth holds lightening and the sun. It absorbs it. Stree has to go somewhere.  Listen to the audios STEPPING TO SLEEP or Audition Excellence to relax and sleep.

We all have days like that where we get rattled. The idea is to catch yourself as you VEER of track and take an SOME action to calm yourself. BREATH is free and always available.

When a situation arises, you have to call on your resources. Your strengths, values, integrity to move toward a solution.

Here is a suggestion:  You're stressed.  THINK of a phrase that is grounding.

Example, "I am - OK."    or   "I am safe."

Break it into two syllables.   (I am  .... and ..... OK)

BREATHE IN and THINK " I am ...."

BREATHE OUT  and THINK  "OK."

Do it 5 times NOW. 

Create your own statement to meet the demands, or what you need.

Here is an GOOD example, I spent Tuesday in the ER with an immediate family member. I had a 5 hour seminar at which I was the primary presenter on WEDNESDAY. I was slated to teach for 4.5 hours. I honored the people I knew who achieved something beyond all odds, that forge through some difficulty to do what they needed to do. I used my breath and kept seeing success, high energy and clear headed. I also recalled times when I was strong and powerful. THAT IS WHAT I TOOK TO THE SEMINAR -

I was  powerful in my presentation. It was flawless, even with all the stress. I had a job to do. We honor our commitments whether it is to dance or life.  Self-importance gets us no where.

Certainly if there was a critical crisis I would have to consider, but how often do we CREATE the feel of urgency or a crisis when it really is not. There is always a solution.

You must change your mind/viewpoints. Some are accustomed to wanting life to be all for, and about them. We collide with each other, don't we?  

To avoid the pain in the body feeling, after a day like that, stretch, bathe, breathe, use a cd. Take SPECIAL care of your body because you use it as a dancer. You rely on your body for your livelihood.

SO WHEN AND IF YOUR CHOOSE TO STRESS,  take some care of your body immediately after.

Sanna Carapellotti, MS CHt

Hypnotherapist

COULD NOT GET IN!

We can now enter the blog once again! Something was askew....

Be back tomorrow!

Dear Sanna - What a week!

This has been such a stressful week for me! Including the fact that I wrote this post already 2 days ago, and the whole thing was lost. Grrrr

Anyway it started with finally taking a placement exam for a class to learn the language here. I know lightyears more than I did before, but I still really need a class to be able to speak fluently and really understand everything. So I practically ran to the place after rehearsal and began what I had no idea would be a 2-hour long test. It was exhausting, especially when I still had to walk home after, but luckily my wonderful roommate had dinner waiting for me :)

Then I had to wake up SUPER early to go get my work visa renewed before work. This is always a nightmare of a process, and this time was no exception, although I must admit probably the least-horrible of all the times since I came here. It feels really good to check that off the list, too.

Then my back decided to hurt really really bad one day. And we had a schedule I would normally love. Tons to do, because it was the first rehearsal this year for a ballet in which I would really love to have a better part. Last year I barely did anything, but I have had my eye on this soloist part for two girls. So the first rehearsal of the day was for this part I really want to dance. The last rehearsal of the day was the first time rehearsing the ballet you may remember me talking about at the end of last year. I am replacing one of the soloists who left, and I really like this part. And in between these two rehearsals which are very important to me, were a whole bunch of not-so-important rehearsals which I felt I had to do with as much integrity as the others, because it's not fair to just try hard with the things I like. So I sucked up my back pain and just did it, and gave 120% for all the rehearsals.

That night I went to see the physical therapist. The trip there was horrible. It took over an hour on the bus, and then I got lost frantically trying to find the place (I was late) without any battery in my phone. I finally stopped a man on the street and begged him to help me write down the address while I used my phone's dying breath to call and ask the doctor where he was located so I could take a cab. I finally got there and he cracked me and hooked me up to machines with heat. It felt better at the time, but sometime after the long trip home on the freezing bus the pain was back.

The next day at work was basically the same, with more demanding rehearsals in between. At the end of the day I was amazed that I even made it to the end.

Today my back hurt more than ever. I did less of class than I have in my entire career (besides the days I thought I would throw up after barre earlier this year). A friend in the company was nice enough to ask the massage therapist if he had time for me, so I got a really nice massage. Unfortunately my back still hurts, but the pt also told me there is trauma that will take time to feel better. At least I'm pretty sure it's not getting worse, and I will try to do exercises. My entire body was really tense, he said, and was a little softer by the end, so hopefully that will also loosen me up a little.

I am just so happy the week is over! I hope it will pay off with the solo part I wanted, but today it was pretty clear that another cast of girls will do it, and I am probably part of the second cast. Last year the second cast only did one show, so that's not too encouraging for me :( I'll keep you posted, though, and hopefully there will be good news to share...

Here's hoping for a fresh new week that is nothing like this one!

Janie