Dear Sanna - And Now, for a Healthy Vent

A fellow dancer was crying loudly in the dressing room as we all showered after a very long day. I felt bad, too, but realized it's just annoying and irrational to complain to other dancers, many of whom feel the same way. Lucky for me, I have you guys! So here goes...

I guess it is necessary to begin on Friday when this choreographer came. He had us walk around the room at random, then stopped us and had us make a circle. He told us all to close our eyes and then turn our head to one direction. Open your eyes. Point at the person you see. If the person you are pointing at is pointing back, you are partners (even two girls!) Then he went to one of the remaining guys and asked who he wanted to dance with, He said me (no problem here, but for some reason the director, not currently present, does not like this pairing). Everyone laughed and the choreographer said okay anyone but her. He picked another girl, so the choreographer asked her who she wanted to dance with. She picked a different boy, so the original guy got what he wanted, me.

As soon as the director walked in it was clear this was not ideal, but I assumed it was not casting anyway, since the choreographer didn't even know us yet and it was seemingly random. So we worked this way Friday and Sunday. Unfortunately for the people who got paired with a bad partner, another girl, or worse, no partner. A few people were switched around so they sort of got a chance, but it was unfair for most and very lucky for me to have a good, consistent partner.

Then today, the first day without the choreographer since he had to leave, a woman somehow connected to him took over rehearsals. We were not told what was going on, just started rehearsing after an already long day. We reviewed the pas de duex we had learned and did it a few times in two groups. Then groups of three. 2 groups went and I still wasn't chosen. Then she asked who my partner was. I told her and she asked if I could do it with someone else. This is a very sensitive pas de duex to weight, size, and coordination, so it is extremely difficult to switch partners, especially just for the "audition". I don't know what to think, because my new partner is actually very good and we were placed in the front, however he had already done it once with a different girl and it didn't go all that well since we had never worked together. I don't know if the director said something about not wanting me to work with my last partner, or if the woman just wanted to pair him with a better dancer or what. So frustrating!

Then when we were working on the girl's solo, she decided to try 9 girls, so she took the first 9 girls in front of her, which did not include me. They did it a few times, me and the other girls not included on the sides, and then she never switched groups! I don't understand, since she didn't seem to put any thought to the girls she chose, but she didn't watch us on the sides, so did the girls she was interested in just happen to be in the first group? I actually thought the choreographer liked me, so I at least thought I would be in the top 9 he would consider! It is so frustrating.

On top of all that, Saturday morning there is a very difficult performance for me, and I just found out our day off (in place of Saturday) will be Friday! I hate having Fridays off before a show, because I feel I really need to do class (and rehearsals!) the day before a show. Not only do I want to prepare for my variation, but I want my partners to prepare as well! It's not fair :( WAHHHHHHHHHHH (this is my rant after all) And I am considering going in on Friday to do class myself and work a little, but that means I will work 13 days straight, plus it doesn't fix the partner problem.

Okay whew at least I got it out somewhere! Now I'll go have a pity party.... Happy Mardi Gras everyone!

Janie