Dear Sanna - The call

The clock was ticking, and still the director had not given me the impression that we were on good terms, but also not that it was bad. I just didn't know, but my mom kept asking if she could call, so on a day the director was in a relatively good mood, I gave her the okay, reminding her that the director is completely crazy and must be dealt with very, very carefully, sucking up at every possible moment. Without actually lying, my mom had to present the truth in a way that made it clear it was completely the director's decision(if not idea).

...so I get a message from my mom about an hour later, that says yay. I was so excited! I called her immediately and asked how she possibly did it. She told the director about the trip, explaining she earned it for free and could take one person and chose me, but didn't want to tell me about it until she cleared it with the director since I (Janie) would never ask for such a thing from the director. She explained it was during a holiday and after not so much cajoling, the director agreed and understood that once my mom made arrangements the trip could not be cancelled. The director said they would not normally agree to this, but they like me very much and I am a good girl! I figured she wasn't mad...

...but it's not over. The next day during rehearsal the director told me to talk to her after. So at the end of the day I sat next to her and she asked me if my mother called. "Do you really want to go?" she asked. I didn't know what to say, because not only would my mom (and I) be horribly disappointed if I couldn't go after all, but I was pretty sure my mom already started making arrangements (she was pretty excited). I told her that of course whatever she decided was her word and that was final, but the trip really means a lot to me and my mom. I guess I should've known it wouldn't be easy and the director wouldn't be exactly thrilled about me going, so I got an earful of guilt-tripping, being reminded that I will miss a lot of work and they will not stop performances or anything else for me and I won't be paid as much that month and blah blah blah, but in the end she said I could go, and I guess that's what matters. I am starting to learn that if the director wants to like me and be nice to me, she will, and if not she will find any reason to be angry, pretty much regardless of how I act. So I might as well do what is really important to me, and try to make her happy when I can.

Janie