Tuesday, July 6, 2010

Dear Sanna - Yay!!

I must say these last few weeks before vacation are pretty hard. We are all very tired from a long year and very much looking forward to some real time off. Plus, we are sick of doing the same ballets all year, some even longer than that, and in this last stretch we are doing almost all the ballets we have done this year. It is very difficult to work on so many different ballets at once, plus a new one nobody is all that excited about. Right now it seems so mundane. I know next season it will be better because we will have more new pieces to work on, but right now I really need to try to motivate myself to work.

But I had a wonderful boost of confidence the other day. I was stretching before rehearsal when the director started asking me about a new girl who might come and her current company. In the middle of our conversation the director said I had lost enough weight and not to loose any more. She has never told me not to loose weight before, and I know it is not even always directly connected to my actual weight. It just means in general she is happy with me, so I felt really great after that. It's not that I need to be told I'm skinny or something to be happy. I know how I look and how much I weigh, but since I know this is the director's way of showing she is happy with me, it was really great to hear.

I am also relieved that the huge favor my mom and I asked of the director did not seem to have a long lasting negative impact. Maybe it even proved that I am in a good place here. Yay :)


No comments: