Dear Sanna - 7 obscurities

7 random things about me:

1. I ALWAYS make a wish when I see the clock at 11:11

2. I have obsessive compulsive tendencies, like counting steps or avoiding cracks on the ground

3. I watched Home Alone every day as a child, and my favorite quote was "families suck"

4. I have never heard more than a quarter of the music in my itunes library

5. I can't use the restroom if I know people can hear me

6. I used to cry about my life going too fast ...when I was about 6

7. If John Mayer asked me to marry him today (although we have never spoken) I would say absolutely yes, despite the faces he makes while playing guitar

Dear Sanna - commencing condensation

I think I'll try to condense that last post a little at a time. I'll start with a sentence for each part.

Why be mad I didn't perform when I can be happy I learned it? Why be upset I wasn't chosen for a company I don't want to dance for anyway? Ballet should be fun, because it makes me dance better, it's more enjoyable to devote my time to something that's fun, and I can express myself.

I'll get back to that later...



Tonight we were surprised to see that our substitute teacher was the drill sergeant who teaches our Tuesday morning class every week. Imagine my excitement. It was almost a blessing in disguise that we had no warning, though, since I had no new pointe shoes sewn to wear at barre, so my toes got a little break (until center at least). Actually, tonight's class wasn't so bad since there were a lot more people for her to evenly distribute her nitpicking, but I think I'll still feel that 1000th fondue tomorrow when we're repeating for the tenth time on releve and there are only a few meager adults to distract her.

It's okay though, it's good for me.

And in my frustration trying to find a flight for an audition that will get me back in time for an oh-so-important Sunday rehearsal, I pigged out tonight, so I guess sweating to the point that there was literally 4 square inches of leotard that wasn't completely drenched in sweat kind of makes up for that a little.

...I digress, but it is way past my bed time! Spring forward. Jeez. Goodnight!

Janie

DanceMind: Dear Janie, We Have been Tagged by Selly!

A few posts ago we were tagged by a delightful regular reader and dancer, Selly. I had heard of Blog Tag yet did not know how it was played. It is easy enough.

Here are the rules:
1 - Link to the blog who tagged you.
2 - Post the rules on your blog
- Share seven random and/or weird things about yourself.
- Tag seven people at the end of your post and include links to their blogs.
- Let each person know they have been tagged by leaving a comment on their blog.

Here are seven things you do not know about me:

1. I am a coffee snob. I can taste the slightest change in bean. That first sip can be annoying. I am either commited or it is dumped. I also can only drink a half a cup at a time because it has to be a certain temperature.

2. I used to be a body builder and power lifter. Worked out 2 hours every day.

3. I am highly intuitive.

4. I dressed as a bag lady with my friend, Kevin, to see how people would react to us. We went to Bennigans for dinner dressed poorly and were treated poorly. We were not obnoxious just badly dressed. One guy told my friend at the bar (she was a (friend) plant) "Ya know if you look at her, she ain't too bad looking."

5. I rode a motorcyle for 5 years.

6. I wear a charm that I gave my Mom when I was twelve. It is pinned inside my bra. I feel safe and connected to her

7. I ate chickens' feet when I was a child and liked gnawing on them. :(

That is it!

Here are my tags --

Dancehunter, Diaryofadancemom, Great Dance, DC DanceWatcher, Downtown Dancer,
Infinitebody,

DanceMind: Dear Janie -- It in There

Janie -- Good Post. Very meaningful. 'Full of it' in a good way.  You have lots of clear insights and very definite emotion.

After writing about WHAT YOU BRING to ballet .... do you feel the difference in terms of purpose and what keeps you focused. Who you are is steady. That devotion is constant. Creativity is energy that is shaped and ever flowing.

You have a couple of really good lines in your last post that can speak of that thread we have been working on -- Can you reread that and pull out a short sentence that says it all

Read it without 'thinking.' Let the words lift out of the page for you to connect with. Your insight is powerful.  Take a look at the essence post again too.  It is very spiritual (not in a religious sense). 

This statement will carry you when times are tough, when you need to keep going, or your feet are bleeding.

Dear Sanna - humor, devotion, and creativity

Whew this is a long one! Read it in three parts if it makes you feel better...

part 1
Your "keep going" post, made me laugh, Sanna. It is so true. What am I going to do about? Of course I am not going to scream at the director. I'll even admit that I was almost relieved to not perform. We all know second cast was not prepared to go in! And the same thing you said popped into my own mind. I surely wouldn't be happier if I hadn't been asked to learn the piece at all. That would be "unfair", too. I can analyze this for hours and hours and go around in circles justifying both my frustration and the director's decision. But instead I'll just choose to be an optimist and be thankful for my opportunity to 1) watch great dancers, choreographers, musicians, etc 2) learn new choreography and get extra practice 3) burn more calories! (haha I'm kidding. kind of)

part 2
I have now finished this year's first official audition. Nothing. Not that I was really expecting much, but disappointing nonetheless. It's almost worse when those places I am not all that interested in are not-all-that-interested right back. Really we are not meant to be. It's okay. I don't especially want to live in this place, and the rep is entirely too contemporary for my liking/training. It's just frustrating to see others who I suspect are in a similar situation chosen above me. It's not like I would turn down a job! I'm just getting antsy, not exactly having any sort of back-up plan for next year. Honestly if they don't offer me anything here or anything else, I have no idea what I will do. I am not ready to give up.

part 3
Which brings me to your question - what do I bring to ballet. I thought I could best describe what I bring to ballet with three words that also conveniently organized this post for me: humor, devotion, and creativity.

I like to have fun with ballet. I think my smile can be contagious, and I can change the whole energy of a room or corps de ballet. Sometimes a little humorous, friendly competition can help us all maybe whip out that third pirouette. I don't know, but it seems like everyone's a little happier and dances a little better when we spread the cheer, so I like to be a little bit of a class clown sometimes.

Of course I am devoted to ballet. At this level, we all are (I hope). But I really think I put all my heart and soul into my dancing. I want all my energy to go into really perfecting a tendu, if we are working on tendus. I will, almost selfishly, do practically anything for ballet, or at least want to. It is probably way too high on my list of priorities, but I like it that way.

Finally, I think the best thing I offer to ballet is creativity. I love to find new ways of looking at the same steps dancers have done every day for years and years. It's fun to phrase the steps in a combination to make it unique from everyone else, and I love the freedom to choose which parts of a dance I want to highlight with big, bold movements, and which I want to do quickly or quietly or whatever I want. It's amazing how much we can say with our bodies, without saying a word.



thanks for your patience with my absence/extreme posting!

Janie

DanceMind: Dear janie, Essence

Whether it is ballet, horticulture or debating, there is often a 'calling' described when this passion rises. (in your case ballet). It is a deep sense of connected with whatever you do. You have a purpose. It feels clear no matter what the cost. It fits like a glove. I gives you your breath.
You express yourself through movement and rhythm.

The experience of ballet is too fickle, in a way. the ups and downs, the trials and tribulations, the joy and achievement.

you carry this connected, this essence to class. Because it is who you are. Dancing gives you deep purpose and fulfillment.

A rose comes from a rose seed.

When you carry this 'spirit' into class than you are always on solid ground. A bad day is part of the experience. A good day is part of the experience. It is ballet.

This spirit brings you back for more Because it is who you are.

Like the climber I mentioned a few posts back. He must climb as You must dance.

I know a dancer who was born dancing. She 'never walked' when she was little. She was always twirling, leaping, spinning and bowing. Today she is a dancer. We all bear gifts.

Sanna Carapellotti, MS CCHT

DanceMind: Dear Janie -- what do you bring?

Janie, yes the weeks fly by.

I stop and think "I wonder what Janie is up to?" "Has she heard from her auditions?"

Wow! It is almost time for summer intensives. Dancers traveling, sleeping away from home ...

I have a question - What do you bring to the art of ballet as a dancer?

Sanna Carapellotti, MS CCHT

Performance Specialist

PS -  Stay tuned for some exciting new programs fro dancers! HINT: Summer Intensive!

Dear Sanna - where did the week go!?

That man who climbed Mt. Everest sounds amazing. It's true - it really is hard to imagine the incredible things one experiences without experiencing it for yourself.

I love ballet because I still feel like dancing every day, even when I say I hate it, because I'm frustrated and sore and my feet are blistered and my legs are sore.

The company finished their program and are finally on break, although the school really never gets a break. We actually have extra rehearsals now, to take advantage of all the free studio space.

School is a little overwhelming right now, but almost over! Finally! Just 2 more weeks left in this quarter. I still have to decide if I will take more classes right away...

Janie

DanceMind: Dear Janie,

I just finished reading "The Scarlet Stockings," by Charlotte Kandel. I was asked by her publicist to read it and write a review on this blog. At first I thought 'no, I won't.' Then I decided that it was time for me to indulge in a litle fiction and offer a review. Well I must say I was in for a surprise. I will complete the reivew this week and you can read it here. What a story!

Janie, How are you? Any word on your auditions?

Sanna Carapellotti, MS CCHT

DanceMind: Dear Janie -- Keep Going

Happiness is continuous creative activity.  Baba Amte (social activist)

________________________________________________  *

"Yes, that really stinks learning and rehearsing a piece and then not performing it --- Yet it is a part of the experience. Rehearsing and learning those parts is an extension of your training. Everything you do builds strength of mind and body.  

I know how you love performing.  There is nothing more exciting that breathing the breath of those who had danced before you on the stage. The lights, the costumes, the smells, excitement, camaraderie, work .... 

If performing is your expected outcome of learning a piece you may feel more disappointed than you need to be.  This is a reality that aint gonna change, Janie.

This is a common complaint, yes?  I know I hear about the 'unfairness.'  It probably does not go on your resume either, even if you learn it really well.

How can you let go that frustration, cause it is not going to change.  

HOWEVER ----

You never know what is up around the bend.  Dancers quit, are injured, have emergencies, become ill .... Life happens yet the performance has to go on.

It is certainly not to hope that someone becomes ill or hurt or has troubles.  

You must always be ready to do your 'part' even if you do not perform it.  

Let me ask you this -- Have you had the experience that "Oh I learned that piece when I was at __________."  

The other side is -- Let's say that they DO NOT INVITE YOU to learn any piece of choreography?  hmm-mm.

_________

It is the same with my work -- I love learning and developing new techniques to assist people with healing and performance issues.  I  put many hours in study, classes, etc. 

However,  applying the newly learned technique to my first Monday morning client, if it is not appropriate, would be uncaring and unprofessional.  So I hold it until it is applicable, yet my brain and knowledge base has expanded. I am more competent.  I guess this can be applied to many professions.

Same with you, Janie. Look at it as 'growing' yourself as a dancer.  

Or you can storm up to the artist director and scream, "This is not fair! I have 4 blisters on my feet from learning this piece. I want to perform NOW!"

Better to buy a journal ...

Sanna Carapellotti, MS CCHT

Performance Specialist

PS -- Let us know about your auditions/ possibilities.

Dear Sanna

So second cast corps is officially not performing this program. I'm not really surprised, nor extremely upset, since I'm not the only one or anything, but it is disappointing to go through another season of almost daily rehearsals and a few weeks of sitting at the theater, useless, without getting anything back really. I guess it's always good to have the opportunity to learn new choreography, practice, etc., but... yeah. Anyway it's still fun to be at the theater and get to watch the shows and sometimes even get a little break from school class when we are supposed to be at two places at once. Last week we actually got in trouble, though, for missing school class when we were told to be at the theater. Go figure - seems like a lose, lose situation to me, so at least we got to rest our feet a little.

Anyway I am currently awaiting replies from many companies to which I sent requests for company class auditions. I emailed some places, sent letters and DVDs to others, or made phone calls. So far I've only heard back from two or three, with official dates set up with only one! Hopefully things will come together this week, or else I'll have to start nagging.

Janie

DanceMind: Dear Janie -- Love and Passion

Last night I attended a National Speakers Association event. Will Cross was the guest speaker.

He climbed Mt Everest 3 times. On his third try he reached the top. To hear his story was breath taking. The planning, the work, the risk (he is also diabetic and has 6 beautiful young children) and his commitment to his love and passion for climbing. He has climbed  mountains all over the world.

He showed us this photo of him standing on this 4 story high ladder. He was climbing up a wall of ice.  I looked at that photo and was awe stuck, some in the room were negative thinking - "Not for me!"  (I had that thought too)

He looks at it and is smitten with love and deep passion. His entire being sings. It is who he is.

It was an amazing story -- We climb mountains in our minds and he actually physically climbs the mountain and views it as a challenge through which he nourishes his soul and inspire others to pursue their passion, even if it is scrapbooking. 

I had no idea of all the risks and how one has to go about climbing. How one has to walk and breathe and eat, and use time. It was such an experience to hear. I see him in front of the room talking and joking, yet that is all I see. I am not involved or present in the process or the anguish.

Like ballet, I can watch you perform, all dressed pretty, taking your bow, yet how you get to that center stage takes an enormous effort. As you advance up the ranks YOU HAVE TO KNOW WHY YOU ARE THERE from the inside. Because if you quit tomorrow, someone will take you place real fast.

This statement is not complicated, Janie. It is what keeps you dancing when your feet are swollen and hurt, and no one sees you or notices, or when you want to sleep.

Think of it like a magic carpet, as one a dancer client realized. She created this whole empowering experience around this carpet that gave her strength, healing and guidance. It was really cool.

Sanna Carapellotti, MS CCHT

Performance Specialist

DanceMind: Dear Janie -- Good Eye!

"SMART" move on your part.  The details are important.  

Your statement is operational even though you have not spoken it.

:)

Sanna Carapellotti, MS CCHT

Performance Specialist

Dear Sanna - why I dance on hold

So today we had rehearsal for the company, which has mostly consisted of me trying to practice in the back of a cramped studio, as a member of the second cast. But today my alternate was missing so I got to go in! The directors didn't really realize, so they were about to start with a missing person and I asked if I should step in, trying to be a "smart dancer". They said yes please, but nothing after the rehearsal, so I don't really know whether or not I impressed them or if they even noticed me, but it was fun to actually get to dance, and I think I did an okay job. We are all lazily excited to get to miss school class to go to the theater the rest of the week! I love being in the theater, whether I get to dance or not, plus it will be a nice little break having only one class a day. Well that's all for now. Good night!

Janie

DanceMIND: Dear Janie -- Seed

Janie,

It is like an undercurrent that steadies your 'pointe,'  gives you purpose, defines you.  Some of what you revealed is dependent on mood or performance.  This statement comes from within. It is what is inside the seed that is 'seedness.' or petunia-ness.  :)

Sanna

PS --   Do you find that performance creates stress eating with yourself and other dancers?

DanceMind: Dear Janie, You are close

Yes, you gain a lot of life skills, such as discipline, passion, vision as a result of ballet. You love ballet. Ballet strengthens your work ethic, offers constant challenge, and stimulates excitement. As you have written in recent posts, it is very clear what ballet does for you. How it has shaped your life.

What do you bring to the studio, Janie?

That sentence, or affirming statement that strengthens your conviction about why you do this every day for so many hours in so much pain for your life.

Imagine if you could pour all of this sentiment into a funnel -- what sentence would form.
Your statment is a reverse of this energy, Janie. You talk about what BALLET DOES FOR YOU. This is energy moving toward you. My question is "what moves out of/from you that circulates, connects and mingles with this practice of ballet and what it could offer to someone? HINT: Life purpose/truth.

I am not going to give the statement to you, BECAUSE I DO NOT HAVE IT. You have to discover it within as it lays a foundation for WHO you are in relation to what you have chosen to do. The more clear you are, the stronger you become.

You have to want to get there ...

Sanna Carapellotti, MS CCHT

Dear Sanna - I need help

Okay I feel extremely shallow, but on my several attempts to pull out my deep, inner reason why I love dance, I can't really think of anything more than that it is responsible for all the aspects I like about myself. I feel like it's a great way for me to discover new things about myself, like how I can be creative and make things my own, even when they are a specific choreographed step that everyone else must do as well. I like how it motivates me to really push my limits and get things done or work hard at things that might not matter as much if I didn't have ballet. I always got straight A's in school, because I never wanted anyone to have a reason to say ballet shouldn't be a part of my life. If I didn't have that motivation, maybe I would've slacked off a little more, or who knows? Anyway, I guess my one sentence is that I love ballet because of the way it makes me feel and the things it makes me do, but that's not really a "spiritual in nature" answer, is it? Where do I go from here?

Janie

DanceMind: Dear Janie, Why.

Janie,

You are almost there. I hear you and know it was already written.

However, here is what I want you to do ...

Sit in a quiet meditation with 'all your love and practice for ballet'

There is no need to run out and buy incense. All you have to do is take a few breaths, sit quietly and place your attention on your ' heart center.' After a few mins., ask this question, "why ballet/ or What purpose does this have? WHY do I have to do this?

Constrct your own sentence. Allow the response to surface. You will hear it loud and clear,

I want you to come up with a defining sentence that speaks ALL THAT YOU WROTE ABOUT. (I will give you a hint -- it is spiritual in nature.)

Everything you wrote and re-presented is good, clear and strong. Yet it all links back to that seed in the previous post. Your love grew out of something.

When you touch in with that, you will take command.

Sanna Carapellotti, MS CCHT
Mentalperformances.com

Dear Sanna - Deja vu... again?

Once again, my thoughts seemed familiar, and sure enough, I have laid out the reasons I dance. This is from a post of mine last year:

It would be impossible to explain all the reasons I dance, but I'll try my best...

First of all, I love the challenge. There is always something more to strive for. Your training is really never done, and it's exciting and fun to be constantly improving and being able to do more and more. It's fun to jump higher and do more turns! I love seeing my progress over time and having the ability to literally change my body.

I also love the order ballet gives my life. I look forward to a regimented class every day. I like the level of respect that isn't necessarily a part of everyday life for most people.

Performing is also one of the reasons I dance. Being on stage gives me a thrill unlike anything else. I especially love getting the opportunity to dance many shows where I can become familiar enough with a role to have fun with it and really dance to my full potential. It's nice to know the steps well enough to stop thinking about the steps and focus on my technique and performance quality.

When I'm not dancing my body just doesn't feel right. Even a few days off makes me feel stiff and lazy. It's nice to have a career/hobby that also keeps you in shape.

But then I'm missing the sort of inexplainable thing that makes me love ballet itself. I don't really know why I think doing plies and tendus every day is so much fun. Or why I think a foot can be beautiful or somebody twisting their body into abnormal shapes. My mom used to ask me in wonder all the time why I wanted to go to class every day, even when I wasn't performing. I just like it. I like the people involved in the ballet world (for the most part) and that sort of inside joke if you will that only ballerinas share. For some reason we all just seem to get each other and I love being part of a worldwide network like that. I feel special being involved with ballet and I don't think I will ever be happy unless ballet is a part of my life, whether or not I make it as a professional.

All of this is still true. Just today I was grumbling in the back of a very crowded class at a difficult combination, when I watched somebody do a step and had a mini epiphany. (That looks like fun!) Ballet is fun, simple as that. I wanted to do the pirouette and land in a different position and turn and twist into something else to this beautiful music we so often take for granted JUST because it's fun and for no other reason. That's why I love dance.

Janie

DanceMIND: Dear Janie -- Seed

Janie,

Think of it (the WHY)  as a seed. 

If you plant a seed, everything grows out of its 'seedness.'  The roots, stem, petals, leaves ... everything that creates the plant. Under the ground and above the ground is all the support it needs to determine the quality of plant .... from  sun, rain, ecology of the soil and micro-organisms. 

It all goes back to the seed. The seed defines and influences the path (What kind of flower it is)  (Its characteristics) etc.

Same with ballet.

Sanna Carapellotti. MS CCHT

PS -- It is the same with auditions -- Some say, I want to get in to >>>>> ....  but they really do not know WHY they are there. There is sometimes more concern for status then what is best for WHO THEY ARE AS DANCERS.  The Audition CD helps to define and manage that whole process.

When you firmly know WHY YOU ARE THERE. You claim your space and go for it. 

Got it?