Dear Sanna - In Response to Your Questions...

I am comfortable with (the idea of) living alone in a foreign country. I have never done it, so I can't be sure, but the idea of moving out of the U.S. does not phase me. I really see it as an opportunity to study abroad, which many of my friends and family have already done, so it does not really scare me.

There are concerns in this area that it might not be the safest place, but then again there's always going to be a risk, no matter where I go, and I won't let that dictate my life. There's possibility of another terrorist attack (heaven forbid) in New York City, but I would never think twice about that if I was planning on moving there. I could be scared of living in the south because of hurricanes. To me, there may be fears, but unless there are absolute reasons that would make me weary of even visiting a place, I don't like to let such things prevent me from living my life.

I do not know someone directly in the area, but I have many good friends and family who have already told me about people they know there. An Uncle already told his friends in high positions there that I may be coming, and they promised to take care of me.

I'm not sure I would really call this a risk, but if it is, I took a similar risk by moving where I am now, and I have no regrets.

When I think about myself years from now looking back on this experience, I can't imagine regretting making the move. Rather, it seems like an opportunity one might regret if they missed out on. I am not really missing out on any other opportunities by staying here, because I don't really have any other opportunities. None of the offers I received this year made me feel this way. It was all kind of expected, or disappointing after learning the details.

I can't really predict what I would say to myself in the future, because I don't know how my life will play out. Everything happens for a reason, I think, and I'm sure either way I will have a pretty good life. I'm sure if I go I will learn a lot, no matter what happens. If I decide I hate it and want to move back, then I'll have that experience and that new knowledge. Of course if I like it, I'll stay for I don't know how long. If I don't go, I'll always wonder what could've happened, although maybe sticking it out here another year would result in a job. Or maybe taking a modest position somewhere else, it will turn out to be the right place for me, but why not choose the place offering me a job, with a real adventure?

I can afford to travel home in the case of a family crisis or if I just decide I want to go home. The only thing about living in this place that will be more expensive than my current situation is travel. Everything else (as far as I know) should be about the same, or probably even a little cheaper. I won't have a car there, so no gas money, and I'll probably be within walking distance from the studios, so no public transportation money either. Housing even seems a little less expensive. In addition, I will have a monthly salary, so my parents should be putting out less money that they would if I stayed here, and if I need to come home, they could definitely afford it, or if they continued to give me the same financial assistance as this year, I could use my savings for a plane ticket.

Janie

DanceMind: Dear Janie -- CON, Pointe 1

Janie Writes - It's very far away. This means even more expensive air fare and longer flights. (so less visits home) But not necessarily less people visiting me, because I think this place might have more appeal than my current location.  PLUS I'll be getting paid, so the airfare is more feasible.

Yes, the distance can be a deciding factor. It is far, very far. Less trips home and less visits from family and friends.  People are certainly more mobile these days and what used to be 'half way around' the world now is perceptively much closer.  

Yes, your pay will have to assist with travel costs etc. Unless someone is supporting you, such as parents or others. 

Distance can be a factor if you want to be closer to home, or have home be accessible.

Is your personality one that is easily adaptable to changes?

Sanna Carapellotti MS, CCHT

Performance Specialist

DanceMind: Dear Janie -- PRO, Pointe 6

Pro Point 6 --  Janie Writes --My parents are actually supportive. Of course they do not want me to be so far away, but I was surprised to hear how ready they were to agree to this.

This is a definite plus that your parents support you.  They are saying that they trust you, that you are capable, and that they are in agreement that it could be a good experience for you. They may also be agreeing that some financial support is possible. (Have you discussed the 'business' end of it with them?)

You must have earned their trust and secured their commitment to your goals by your hard work, your life style, how you behave and your attitudes towards them and your desire to pursue ballet. This is to be applauded. We all know that the path in the ballet world is not 

a traditional straight and narrow one. 

You would want to ask -- the "What if's ..."  Can you afford to travel back and forth in the event of a family crisis? Or if you decide that you are too unhappy, or the situation was not safe, or you are injured ???

Because of the distance, I think you need to consider  a broader picture to know that safety and health issues are discussed and reasonably planned out.  It is not like living in the next city where your parents can drive over in you are ill or injured. I do not believe that this is being negative. If you have a plan in place then you, and they, will feel more secure and safer.

I am sure the company has ideas too. Ask them any questions of this nature.

Kudos to you and your relationship with your parents!!! Keep talking with them as you discover more information. Being older and wiser they will have a different slant and perspective to help sort through what you are learning.

Again, Keep learning and discovering!!!  I am so proud of you and your approach to this ---

Sanna Carapellotti, MS CCHT

Performance Coach and Specialist

DanceMind: Dear Janie -- Question

Janie, Let's say you have advanced in age and are now 45. You may be married, have a few children, working, have your education, you maybe involved with ballet in some way.

Can you look back and see/feel this experience as being a part of your life?

What  would you say  to younger Janie if you were helping her make this decision (and she had WENT)

What would you say to to younger Janie if you HAD NOT WENT for some reason?

Sanna Carapellotti, MS CCHT

Performance Specialist and Coach

mentalperformances.com

DanceMind: Dear Janie -- PRO, Pointe 5

I have nothing to lose. I really have no strings here right now. I don't have a job. I rent an apartment. Im attending community college which I intended to transfer anyway. I was prepared to move this year anyway, even if I hadn't thought it would be out of the country. Janie, pro point #5 in  considering her move VERY far away to dance ballet (paid position) with a professional company.

Having this freedom is a definite plus and very well conceived. You are free to move in all aspects of your current life. You can leave when your contract is finished this year. School, housing, work, training and no relationships are holding you in your current state. 

Yes, you had planned to move anyway, unless of course you were offered a position of apprenticeship or company.

So the only thing that could keep you  from moving is you. Are you willing to take the risk?

Well, let's think about  this -- whether you move here or there .... adjustments in home, environment, relationships, training/dance opportunities will be apart of the move regardless as to where you live. New friends, change of scenery/weather, different studio, new teachers,

the need to make new friends, discover new experiences to live life differently in a foreign country.

Most students are forever impacted after living in a different land. The culture stimulates interests and new awarenesses.

Are you comfortable living alone on a forgien country? Is this country a safe place? Are there any concerns in that area?  Do you know someone in the area? Are you a risk taker? 

You have the  freedom to go according to Point #5.

Sanna Carapellotti, MS CCHT

DanceMind: Dear Janie -- PRO, Pointe 4

Good weather is always a plus.  

WOuld that deter you from accepting a job if it were really hot or very cold at this point?  It is something to consider sometimes. 

Sanna Carapellotti. MS CCHT

DanceMind: Dear Janie --With Information

Janie,  With information you can accept this offer.

     With information you may not want this offer.

Take good notes as you re learning more each day ...

Sanna Carapellotti, MS CCHT

www.mentalperformances.com

Dear Sanna - awww man! (but it's okay!)

I got an email last night from the director's assistant that explains that they were hoping I could come learn some ballets before they go on tour at the end of May so I could go along, but of course I have to finish out my "contract" here so I can't go :( Boo that would have been so cool!

He also told me the next season begins in August, so that sounds a little comfier, to everyone. The contracts last one year and continue from year to year if I "stay working in the company." Does that mean I can get fired? If so, that's okay because I would almost rather see a company with a strong work ethic and integrity than have a cozy job for the rest of my life with a company I've never seen that could possibly be very lazy.

They provide health care (yay) and pointe shoes, although we will need to further investigate this, as I am told they may not be able to get the kind I like. (Could I provide my own and be reimbursed?)

Okay ready for the bad news? The salary I calculated must have been a monthly salary, because I am told I will start out with $1000 a month, not a week. Ha. I knew it was too good to be true. Oh well, as many have said, it's more than I am making now or could hope to make next year anywhere else! Honestly, I am relieved this is the bad news at this point. Clearly I am not in this profession for the money, although it would be nice. I'm hoping this amount will pay the bills, but really, this is an amazing opportunity and as I said I would be making less if I stayed here anyway. So that's that.

Anyway they seem very nice, and I really can't see why I wouldn't accept this offer, as long as the whole citizenship thing goes smoothly - of course I will be looking into that further this week.

Janie

DanceMind: Dear Janie -- Pros - Point 2

POINT TWO - Good Pay. The director's assistant did not give me any details yet, so I googled the companies salaries and found an article that described them in the country's currency. I used online currency converters and unless I messed up or the source is unreliable, the company makes between 800.00 and 1100.00 a week.  That's about what the first year corps at NYCB makes, so I couldn't hope for a higher salary even if I was offered a job here. If I do stay, the best I'll get is a small stipend, no where near enough to pay my bills, or perhaps tuition.

COMMENT --    Yes, that does sound good. HOWEVER, you do not have anything in writing, or a contract.  There may be some other consideration for someone of your position, so you really can't decide if it is good or not until you know what you will receive and the cost of living, etc.

You also have to consider relocation costs. How long will it take you to recoup flights, transfers,  all your expenses. Will they reimburse you for anything?

Many performers work a few jobs to meet expenses. There are countless ways to do that as you know.  

What are the expenses of living in THAT country?  Do you know?  The average income.  The cost of food, rent, etc.   Are your parents willing to offer monthly support?

POINT TWO/PRO

Dear Sanna - told the director of the school

Every time I approach the director of the school, I feel a little annoying and timid, knocking on her door "um do you have a minute?" so today I caught her on her way out of class and said "I have news!" It felt like a better approach, but when I told her, she hadn't heard of the company (I was not surprised) and seemed pretty skeptical at first. She said I could go check it out for the first week in May if I wanted, but I needed to be back for the last 3 weeks of May for shows. I told her what I knew about the company and gave her the website and went to get ready for class. My spirits had dropped a little.

Then, after class, the director and the "career adviser" of the school seemed much more optimistic, after doing a little research. They liked what they saw about the rep, size of the company, amount of performances per year, touring, etc. They said definitely go check it out first, suggesting the first week of May....

Mom did not like that very much. It is "way too expensive" and "too short of notice" for me to fly out for the first week in May. So I emailed the company back explaining my obligations through May.

I still think this looks like a really cool, likely possibility for next year! If so, I will have a very busy few months...

Janie

POINT  ONE ....  (PRO going overseas)  It is the only job offer I have. Even if I am successful in all of many auditions. The best offer I can even hope for is a second company position. I could end up back in a ballet school. It seems to me that having been in a ballet corp makes it easier to get a job. Even if I hate it and want to come home. It will be easier for me to get a job than if I had stayed in the states.

COMMENT:

You have a job offer.  You want paid for your work as a dancer.

You must evaluate, and consider if this is right for you.   You are doing research, talking with people, etc. Because you have been offered a PAID position, considering the expenses involved, relocation, other issues, You have to look AT THE BIGGER PICTURE. It is much more than getting paid to dance.

I feel a bit concerned that they have asked you to be on location in less than 2 weeks, or so. How realistic is that for you to jump ship, pay for a visit and really get a feel for if it is right for you.   I am being a devils advocate here, not encoiuraging or discouraging.

I know that many young dancers begin to feel taken advantage of in their training. They work hard, long long hours and sit in the audience to watch other casts perform. You know the drill. Sadly it can be true in some cases and is the nature of the beast.  DO NOT ALLOW this angst to take to VERY FAR away places, unless you have INFORMATION and it makes sense and you are willing to take the risk.

This is now a business decision.  Can you afford  to move and return if you do not like it?

Yes, Students live and work abroad. You can do this if you are willing to accept responsibiltity for the risk. However, you must realize it is not like moving to another area of town, which can be costly, too.

BALLET SCHOOL -- Many dancers are graduating form college after 4 years of training and looking for work. It seems to me (I am not in the profession, yet I hear from teachers and clients in my work)  there is time for maturation. You are not 20 years.  The truth is you may still need to be in training (I do not know that, of course).  

This is not a dream, it is a real possibility that you must evaluate.

Pointe ONE.

Sanna Carapellotti, MS CCHT

Performance Specialist

DanceMind: Dear Janie -- Pros and Cons of Accepting Ballet Position VERY Far Away

Janie,

You have a lot to consider...

I will make a comment about each point(e).

Feel free to write freely about what is on your mind, your joys or fears.  

I am happy to hear that you 'love this blog."

Well, girl, This is so exciting!!!! You have a lot to think about!

Sanna Carapellotti, MS

WWW.mentalperformances.com

Dear Sanna - pros and cons

That's one of the reasons I love this blog. I have considered the pros and cons of this decision, but it's definitely helpful to write it out.

Pros:
1. It's the only actual job offer I have. Even if I am successful in all of my auditions, the best offer I can even hope for is a second company position, and I could end up back in a ballet school. It seems to me that having been in a ballet corps makes it easier to get a job, so even if I decide I hate it there and want to come home, it will probably be easier for me to get a job than if I had stayed in the states next year.
2. Good pay. The director's assistant did not really give me any details yet, so I googled the company's salaries and found an article that described them in the country's currency. I used online currency converters, and unless I messed up or the source is unreliable, the company makes between $800-1100 a week! That's about what first year corps at NYCB makes, so I couldn't hope for a higher salary even if I was offered a job here. If I do stay, the best I'll get is a small stipend, nowhere near enough to pay my bills, or perhaps even tuition.
3. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity. I may never get another chance to live in another country. Since I did not choose the college route, I almost see this as my opportunity for study abroad, except beyond the cultural and educational benefits, this will also probably help my career, and I will make money doing it, rather than spend it as most study abroad students do.
4. The weather is gorgeous. Enough said.
5. I have nothing to lose. I really have no strings right now. I don't have a job, I rent an apartment I can easily get out of, I'm attending community college which I intended to transfer out of anyway. I was prepared to move this year anyway, even if I hadn't thought it would be out of the country.
6. My parents are actually pretty supportive. Of course they don't want me to be so far away, but I was surprised to hear how ready they were to agree to this.

Cons:

1. It's very far away. This means even more expensive airfare and longer flights. (So less visits home.) But not necessarily less people visiting me, because I think this place might have more appeal than my current location. PLUS I'll be getting paid, so the airfare is more feasible.
2. I know very little about the company, which doesn't necessarily mean it will be bad, but there's a chance I might not like it, or worse, get out of shape or injured while I am there.
3. I know very little about the area, and I won't know anyone going there and I will be all by myself, but this could be the case anywhere.
4. I can only go if I become a citizen, and I really don't know the rules about that, so there could be many cons within this one, or there could be very few. I don't know. And I'm only pretty sure I could maintain my American citizenship, but not positive. Which might be bad.

That's all I got! And newsflash since I began this post: just got an email asking if I can come at the beginning of May! That is REALLY soon in case you didn't know. YIKES? ha that was a typo that it was in all caps and with a question mark, but I decided to keep it there because it seems fitting. I'm really excited, so the "yikes" is unsure. Anyway, they seem to understand that I might have obligations in May (which I might. I will need to ask about this). We shall see!!

Janie

DanceMind: Dear Janie -- So much to ponder...

It is  amazing how life can shift in a moment.  You have options!  These days that seems to be a dancer's dream. I am excited for you to have rec'd that offer, yet there is a lot to consider.

First and foremost, are you willing AND able to live VERY far from home. (I know where you are now, but not where the company is located.)  Yes, the expense is high. How dependent are you on your parents. If they are footing the bill, it may be in part their decision, too. It sounds like a time for a family discussion.  I am sure you have told them about this company. What was their response?

In your next post... Make a list of pros and cons ... 

I do believe CONGRATULATIONS are in order. Te must have liked something about you!  I am sure they realize that you can fly all that way to audition.  Good timing and very couragous!

Sanna Carapellotti, MS CCHT

Mentalperformances.com

PS - I gotta do some work at this moment and will hop back on later today.

Dear Sanna - just when I think I've got them figured out...

So casting went up for the company performances, and second cast was not scheduled to perform at all. Blah blah blah whatever. I was a little annoyed, but it was a silly part anyway, so my cast decided to just play it cool, and relax until our school shows resume next week.

Meanwhile, I just heard back from a foreign ballet company VERY far away. I sent them a DVD, photos and my resume about a month ago, and they just told me if I am willing to move there (which I thought I implied by auditioning), then they would like to offer me a position! It's all very exciting and scary, even though I have very little information. It's kind of hard for me to believe they're offering me a job without ever having seen me dance in person...

Anyway I did a lot of research and the city seems really cool. This morning during class, I decided this is something I am very seriously considering. It seems like this might be that really special and remarkable decision in my life that will change everything. It's just a really cool opportunity to go live in a foreign country - practically a really long vacation. AND on top of that, I'll be achieving my goal of getting a job in a professional ballet company. The biggest drawback are that it is VERY far, which will make traveling expensive, and perhaps that since I have never been there, there's a chance I may not like the country or the ballet company.

As far as the new country goes, this could be a pro or a con - I'll never know until I try it.

ANYWAY, back on the ranch, today they decided to throw in my cast for rehearsal, even though casting is up for all the shows and we are not doing it. So perhaps casting will change? It sounds like we are now doing it next weekend... Go figure. So maybe they do like me here after all. Maybe they will offer me a position. But now I have options! Imagine that. I have a choice in the matter. Maybe everything happens for a reason, and they didn't immediately offer me a position here so that I would audition and get a job with this foreign company. Or maybe the fact that I was offered a position will push the director here to offer me an apprenticeship here. I don't know! I don't even know what I want right now! Maybe they still wont offer me anything here. But then again, I am still waiting on a few other places.

My life is a huge complicated mess (but a somewhat happy/exciting one!)

Janie

Dear Sanna - wow I thought I made a pre-performance post

So I guess I forgot to make a little post last week before the performance madness began. We were in the theater for the greater part of last week, which was a nice way to get comfortable with the stage before the show for a change.

Casting never officially went up, for your information, but I ended up with some decent parts, actually. All corps, except a piece with only 3 people - a boy, another girl, and I, which I actually got the most compliments on, despite our initial dislike for the piece. One of the others is one of my favorite ballets, even if I was only one of many corps members. I had learned the lead, but never got to do it.

The last was a piece I was not supposed to learn at all. I ended up going to rehearsals a few weeks in, and somehow worked my way up from 4th cast to first. I felt a little bad, because the original first cast girl wasn't really ever officially taken out, and it wasn't even really hinted until she left for a pre-excused week-long absence about 3 weeks ago. It was almost more of a punishment to her that I got to do it (both shows so far, and the rest are just school shows), but she's young and had other parts and wasn't mad at me, even if she was upset. I know there's really nothing I can do, but I still didn't feel great about it.

So the shows went pretty well as far as I'm concerned. More shows for the next few weeks, even though I probably wont be performing too much. Still no words about next year, although there was mention of "talking". Dunno when. The director of the school told me. The same one who said I was probably definitely in for next year (in January), so I guess not exactly the most reliable source. I'll believe it when I hear it from the artistic director and keep you posted.

Janie

DanceMind: Dear Janie -- Hello!

How are you ?

I have been exciting involved with helping dancers and other performers get ready for auditions and Spring shows. I am constantly amazed at he powers that lie within and ow they can be unearthed once fear is reduced and managed and often eliminated. Just as you wrote in a few posts back -- just because you have a certain feeling or sensation or thought -- does not mean that you have to respond to it.

One recent performer I spoke with was surprised to hear that he does not have to believe his thoughts, or feel scared if his heart is fluttering. He realized that it was an excitement to perform no really fear as he was interpreting  it. 

Watch for those patterns and re work them to what works for you!!!

Sanna Carapellotti, MS CCHT

Performance Specialist

DANCEMIND: Dear Janie -- Life as a Dancer

I was just thinking about you!!! and your post popped into my e-mail.

Yes, these moments are difficult.  What do you do? How do you manage?

Are you thinking too much, fretting, personalizing in some way?  

Consider this -- You have done your work and your best (at the auditions) at that moment. You have to let go of the outcome because it is out of your hands now ...  Companies make decisions on numbers, technique efficiency, appearance, emotionality, etc.  What can be a fit at one company may not be a fit for another. It is a reality one must face i this industry, very fickle, very demanding, very subjective.

Even with all your hard work and adorable face, Janie, it is not always about you personally, but what they want and need THAT YOU DO NOT KNOW ABOUT.

Continue working and planning -- Ask yourself a series of what if questions to design a plan? What if - you do not receive the kind of invitation you want? (You have received one, although not what you want.)  What if you do receive something from a company you are not so sure about... maybe you are not a good fit? After the audition you realized that maybe you do not like their style, program structure, ...  

Begin to look beyond and formulate a plan. Go out and have some fun too. Get a laugh with your friends. Do something that you enjoy doing.

Do not give up your work ethic and values -- these qualities are YOURS!  

Time is important...

What do  your parents say about this?  They may have options or suggestions.

Janie, THANK YOU for your honesty and forthcoming approach. You reveal some very difficult moments and excitement that many of our readers truly benefit from. (I get personal emails from them).  You are helping dancers to realize that they have options and are not alone in their struggles.

Sanna Carapellotti, MS CCHT

MentalPerformances.com

PS --  You learned a lot during your Audition Tour.

Dear Sanna - anxiously awaiting

I received a letter from the place I wasn't that thrilled with today. Just like they said, I can go there and be a trainee next year, basically what I am doing now - an unpaid position, but only if I go for the summer program. Mwap mwap.

Still no word here. There's a show this week, so I'm trying not to get too worked up over it - I know they're busy, but I'm thinking I might ask after the show. At least I have another option for next year, which might push them in my favor?

Also, Saturday was a week from the audition where I was told we would hear in a week, and still nothing. I hope this doesn't mean it's a no! All I can do is wait, though.

Janie

DanceMind: Dear Janie -- Lots happening

I wanted to have your information about your auditions available at first glance for several days before I responded. You had a wide range of experiences on the audition trail.

I think I comment under each part so that it is directly associated.

You have discovered a lot about yourself I read. I am happy for you. 

Sanna Carapellotti, MS, CCHT

Performance Specialist

Dear Sanna - in the zone

oh yeah the "zone". I mean in general really focused, in the instance I used it earlier, really focused on losing weight. I suppose there is rarely a time when I am not really eating way too much and not really thinking about it, but usually when I get into a habit of eating well, I am very healthy.

It's not that I don't eat sweets at all, but when I am in the zone, I rarely overeat and never feel that gross full feeling. Usually this means I eat less at one time, and more often throughout the day. I have an early dinner and avoid snacks between dinner and bedtime, unless of course I am really hungry, which I know is not healthy.

Frozen veggies are my new favorite. I'm sure I am very strange, but I love eating frozen peas, still frozen. It's like my own healthy version of ice cream! Putting individual yogurts in the freezer is also good. I've unfortunately found that I cannot buy a half gallon of ice cream from the grocery store, because I will have some at least once every day until it's a little more than half way gone, and then I'll just end up eating the rest! So bad. I also can't have too many temptations at once, especially perishable ones, which make it easier to justify eating them before they spoil.

My biggest problem is just eating because I'm bored or I think it's time to eat, or I'm in a social setting with a lot of food, even though I'm not at all hungry. If I just really think about whether my stomach or my brain wants the food, usually I find that I am not really hungry.

I think I'm doing pretty well, and people have told me I look good (yay!), just not the most important people (yet). Soon I think it will be time to speak up if I still don't get any feedback from the artistic director. The show's coming up! We'll see...

Janie

Janie

Dear Sanna - advice!

Reading over my other posts, I just thought of a little piece of advice I would like to give to all:

be prepared for random things at auditions!!

such as:

telling people where you have auditioned, your success, etc. and what you are planning to do. I was a little caught off guard when asked this, and I could have been more clear about my hopes of being offered an apprenticeship where I am, and that I had only just begun my auditions

doing variations or whatever - it's a good idea to have music and something prepared just in case. I have definitely heard of directors asking people if they can do a variation after taking company class...

pointe or flat - you never know what they'll want so be prepared for either

slippery or sticky conditions. maybe shoes fit for either? maybe a little baggy of rosin. or if you need it for your heels, bring your own because many places don't have rosin or don't allow it on their floors! I discovered this the hard way...

and try to find out ahead of time if there is a dress code or if people tend to wear tights over or under, etc. I know I feel more comfortable when I am dressed like the company members


Janie

Dear Sanna - auditions 2 & 3

After that first audition, I spent the rest of the day with my mom, and the next morning we left bright and early for my next audition. This was trainee class, and I knew going in that the best position available was an unpaid trainee position. All higher positions have been filled.

I liked the teacher and the class and I thought I danced okay, but to be perfectly honest I wasn't too excited about the program. There were a LOT of girls, and I think it would be a difficult place to get noticed and promote myself next year.

They told me if I came for the summer I was pretty much guaranteed a trainee spot for next year, but unfortunately I don't think this is something I want to do. At least it is purely my decision in this case, right!

Anyway after the audition we had lunch and drove to my home town, where I got to see some old friends and my puppy! And my dad too! It was very nice to be home, if nothing else. But then there was a cattle call the next afternoon, which was just icing on the cake. My first cattle call outside of New York, which was madness last year, I was surprised there were almost 80 people there. They made one cut, after barre, maybe cutting about half the people. I made it to the end, where they spoke to about half of the remaining group about the school. I was not one of those people, so I am either above or below their standards for the school (although hopefully without sounding cocky I must say I was better than many who were in the school group). The rest of us should hear in a week. The longest week of my life, no doubt. I hate to get my hopes up, but I really would just LOVE to get this job. It seems the most promising of the weekend, so keep your fingers crossed for me!

I woke at 4:00 the next morning to catch a plane back here in order to make it to rehearsal. I had originally planned to return monday, but my teacher vetoed that plan and I had to spend a nice sum of money to change to this lovely flight. I raced into rehearsal a little over an hour late, delighted to see the artistic director present. how wonderful. I think they were happy I made the effort, so not too too upset that I was late, but jumping into my spot ice cold and exhausted from traveling and lack of sleep was not the best way to spend my sunday, nor show off my skills to the director. oh well. what are you gonna do? hopefully he'll still offer me something in the near future, because I don't think I need to tell you what a relief it would be to have my future set, at least for the next year.

Oh and did I mention I recently began some yoga classes (you know in all my spare time this past week. ha.)? Anyway if I am in fact here next year, (or even perhaps if I'm not), I am definitely interested in being certified as a yoga instructor, which would be a nice distraction/supplement to ballet that would prepare me for a backup to ballet, or just a source of some extra money if I do make it as a dancer.

Janie