Dear Sanna - home at last!

I just got back from the most incredible trip. I am exhausted but I had so much fun - one of the best times of my life. Everyone was sad to leave, because it was like a vacation with all of our friends, but coming back here makes it really feel like home. It's a nice feeling. I see I have missed a lot of posts so I will read them and get back to you, but for now I'll talk a little about the trip.

So the day to leave finally came, and everyone was excited to get on the bus and go to the airport, especially our scary ballet mistress, who was completely intoxicated. It was actually really scary to see her so messed up, and it was a little embarrassing for such an important member of the company to look that way in public. She did go back to normal when it was time to work on tour, which was a relief, but a lot of people lost respect for her because of the way she acted. As long as she does her job as wonderfully as she normally does, I guess it doesn't matter that much how she acts outside of work, but it is weird to let your coworkers see you that way.

Anyway the city was incredible and we had tons of fun exploring, trying new food, and bonding with the company. We had breakfast and dinner in the hotel everyday, and usually there would be something going on in some hotel room at night, so I got to spend time with a lot of the company members I don't usually see outside of work. It was so much fun. We even got to do some sight-seeing and touristy things, which made me really appreciate traveling and this company for it's great tours. This trip alone made coming here worthwhile.

The theater was incredible, too. We are used to dancing in mostly really small theaters, usually just for one show before moving on to a new place, so it was great to stay in one spot and have a beautiful, spacious dressing room. The shows were practically all sold-out, which was also cool, because we knew there were a lot of people who really wanted to be there and were interested in seeing us.

Now we have a couple days of rest before it's back to work. It will be interesting to see what it's like back at the studio after the tour.

Janie

DanceMind: Julie

1. Identify the experience and is in assisting her to move forward, stay the same or step back.

2. What are the triggers?

3. Are there any familiarities or parallels?

4. What does she really want to do, feel to handle the classes?

5. Does she have the resources within to cope and set a new perspective?

6. Is there anything she can do within the environment to make changes?

Consider these questions.

Sanna Carapellotti, MS CHT

Performance Therapist and Hypnotherapist

Mentalperformances.com

Dance Mind - Julie.

Julie is 16.  Like you she has lots of teachers for her dance classes. She is a competitive dancer.

There are three teachers that 'rub her the wrong way.' Just the mere thought of them made her grit her teeth. She would rant in her mind during class - "I hate you." "You are so mean and ugly."  

Julie disliked attending these classes and found herself wanting to miss class. She was less than enthusiastic to go to class when she felt devalued and criticized. She did not mind being corrected, but there was a tone that really bothered her and made her angry. She would mess up simple routines and found herself in a rut.

What could she do?

DanceMind: Janie Travels -

While Janie is traveling ... We can look at a few things ...

1.  In the studio there is order. Everyone there has a place, a role and a purpose.  (same as family BTW).  

2. You cannot control the personalities of your teachers with negativity, hostility, gossip or even self-sabotage. They are who they are whole and complete. However, how they act towards you, as a student or professional, does indeed have a consequence. If they are snotty and demeaning, they lose respect, possibly their jobs, the quality of performances diminishes because it becomes difficult FOR SOME to put their best foot forward. Or like a conflict ridden relationship, one looks for approval and acceptance (student to teacher AND teacher to student) and continues striving for the elusive perfection.

3. Do you allow teachers who are MAYBE having a bad day or are consistently mean and punitive take away your power?  Do you realize that when you gripe to yourself and others in the studio, you lose focus and power?  More errors, forgetfulness, less flow, more pain .............

4. You join in the conflict when you match it (just as negative as the teacher) in your mind and body. Student and teacher bond together negatively.

5. Who controls who?  Can you maintain your own Mental STRENGTH to take what you need to know to improve TO REACH YOUR GOALS and leave the emotional stuff where it belongs - WITH THE OWNER (person who behaves badly or 'good').  

6. I will tell you another story tomorrow.

Sanna Carapellotti, MS CHT

www.mentalperformances.com

PS - Pass along this article to your reads - It is ALL In You Head, by Sanna C, Dancer Magazine/January 2009

Outcome Setting

When Janie returns we will move through a goal setting seminar that is fabulous. It becomes a whole body experience that leaves you pumped.  Just saying you want something is not enough. 

We'll do it together, so you can change ... Tell your friends to hop on and everyone can get better together. 

Imagine if we all 'acted as if' we are competent and successful all the time!!!

So when Janie return this weekend or the beginning of next week, we are on it!

Sanna

Here's a story of a lovely dancer -

Lucy (False name) is a professional dancer.  Highly trained and considered to be an asset to her current company she has been offered more challenging and demanding roles.  On stage she is graceful, poised and beautiful. She has been called "a quintessential dancer." On a social note she is well respected, lives somewhat reclusive and quiet.

She called me when she noticed a distinctive change in her stage presence, her ability to be comfortable on stage had diminished and her mind flashed some seemingly unrelated images and words. She felt very unsettled and worried. Her directors were also noticing this distraction.

Lucy knew she had to do something but because it was ambiguous and unusual she did not know where to go.

She found my ad in Dance Magazine and was hoping hypnosis/energy therapies could help her.

Not only do I coach and teach mental techniques, I am also a therapist.

SO we explored her life, discussed her goals, family support. Everything was cool there. She was 'lonely,' had odd sensations in her knees and felt like she was going to collapse for no reason. She had recently been given a different stronger role in an upcoming production.

We decided to look back through her family and BINGO!

Her grandmother was an immigrant to the US.  Her grandmother had been a performer in Europe in the 50's.  She was forced to move to the US by her husband.  When her grandmother arrived here she collapsed and 'fell to her knees.' She cried and cursed her husband saying, "I will never dance again." This collapse created chaos and embarrasment for her grandfather. 

Interestingly Lucy had heard this story repeatedly when she was a child. Lucy's sense of it was that her grandmother was forced to do something that she was not ready to do. Lucy remembered feeling a lot of compassion for her grandmother and currently feels lonely like her in the present time.

Lucy had never met her grandmother because she died just before her birth.

HOW DOES THIS relate to Lucy?

Subconsciously, she strongly identified with her grandmother's plight. She realized that she felt forced to make a change in her position at the company She was not ready to make this change. Therefore displaced the feeling of collapse onto her knees like her grandmother. 

Lucy was still puzzled and discovered that there was a part of her that felt that if she messed up in these upcoming roles (she was being tested) She too would never dance again (Highly unlikely but the mind can play games with us). She also discovered a real loneliness that she had been ignoring.

Loyalties travels down through the generations. Her experience had paralleled that of her grandmother.

She separated herself from THIS identification with her grandmother and connected with her grandmother's true love of the stage. Her grandmothers plight is different from hers and it belongs to her. After  process work now when Lucy dances, her grandmother is looking on proudly (in spirit of course.)  The collapsing sensations are gone, she is ready to be 'tested' and has decided to take action to not feel so lonely.

Who knew? Interesting story. I have been interested in exploring this aspect of how artists struggle in their quest for personal achievement. I think there are times when it is not about more repetitions or mental techniques.

EFT and  Family Constellation work has great potential for healing.

Sanna Carapellotti, MS CHT

DanceMind: Dear Janie, Step Away ...

Janie, when you return from your trip, please reread your previous post.  I would like you to write to me what it was like for you. The story is not important. Those characters and events happen all over the world within companies, the faces are different.

What is the dancer's (your) experience with all of this going on?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It's All In Your Head! The Power of Thoughts on Performance. Dancer Magazine, Jan 2009.

http://danceruniverse.com/stories/issues/200901/notits_in_your_head_the_power_of_thoughts_on_performance-J12/

Share this article with your dancer friends ... It is creating quite the buzzzzz.   Yes, dancers can manage their minds using mental techniques too - just like athletes!  

Tomorrow I will share a case with you that I am allowed to share although no names mentioned. You will be amazed at what can influence your performance. Read it tomorrow here while Janie's gone.

Sanna Carapellotti, MS CHT

Performance Therapist. Coach.

mentalperformances.com

Dear Sanna - hey there

Wow I just wrote the longest post when my internet decided to close!!! I will try to remember...

So Sunday there was a pretty disappointing show, and I didn't even really know what to say right after. The day began with class from a teacher I once really liked, but now she is fighting for her job and trying too hard to seem important. Instead of the good corrections she used to give when needed, now she just stops the music all the time to yell about something stupid and insignificant, just to seem important. She also has to make a point of speaking up and agreeing with only the really horrible things the artistic director says. Anyway I was about at my wits end when we started the grande allegro over for the third time because somebody did an arm in fifth instead of first and then she wanted 4 people instead of 3. We didn't even do a good jete combination, which is really important for me before the triple bill, since I do a lot of jetes. It's not the same practicing on your own without music.

Then we wasted all the time we had for spacing on this stupid new piece where spacing is the least of our worries, and had no time to space the other pieces. The stage was also tiny. By the time we finished the stupid piece, we barely had time to do our hair and makeup, so the other parts were a mess as far as spacing goes. Well it was just a bad show for everyone. We had no room to stretch our arms and legs and everyone was on edge.

The next day the artistic director took a bunch of people out of things, so there would be more space but also because we did not do well. I was somewhat consoled by the fact that I was only taken out of part, while the rest either stayed or went. Of course it would've been better not to be taken out at all, but I was glad I still got to do something. It's really unfortunate the rest had only one chance. Hopefully casting will go back to how it was when we go on tour, where the stage will be nice and big.

Did I mention we were going on a week-long tour by the way? It is so exciting, because we are going to a really famous city, but it is very far, and most company members have never been there (including me!). I can't wait to travel and see all the different things and perform for a new audience. It is a really cool thing to do, and I'm not sure I would ever get to go to this place if I wasn't dancing here with this company.

Anyway there was one last show here last night, and it went much better. We took time to space everything, and there was more room since there were less people. The artistic director even told me it was good (besides one little thing of course) in the end.

So hopefully I will have internet access this week, but if not I promise a detailed description of my trip when I return!

Janie

Dance Mind - WHY SLEEP?

Thanks for the question below, Anonymous.

Yes, you can improve your performance all around with your eyes closed.  Sleep is a necessary component of a solid performance. If you aren't sleeping well or wake up not rested, or even if you are sleeping Ok, you can still improve. 

The most important question - Why would a CD help me?   When you listen , at bedtime, your brain is retrained to get the best most possible. Remember your body needs and knows how to sleep. It is what we DO and think that set the stage for sleeplessness.

AT night the body AND mind are regenerating and restoring. It is set up that way. There are many chemical reactions, and shifts that occur in the body.  I don't want to bust the most important reason why sleep is important, but there is one main reason that assists performers especially.

Here are ways better sleep helps ... reaction time, better moods, lubricated joints, better able to pay attention, can move faster, remember more, eat less junk food,  heal wounds and muscle tears ... When your body and mind are rested you can do more.

SO imagine how those benefits can improve your class, rehearsals and stage presence.

Most teens and college students are very sleep deprived. When you miss sleep, the body struggles and not always immediately.

I set this program, Stepping to Sleep up to be easy because I want dancers to realize self care and how to take a holisitic approach to their training. This is ONE NATURAL WAY to get a good night sleep.

It is important. You will dance the difference literally.  Your teachers will notice.

Sanna Carapellotti, MS CHT

Performance Therapist and Coach

mentalperformances.com

DanceMind: Dear Janie, Sleep, Sleep Sleep ...

I just had to share this story.  A Mom purchased the Stepping to Sleep CD for her daughter last summer.  The daughter was not interested (she is 16) ... she said that she slept ok and was performing fine.

The truth, according to Mom, was that her sleep was less than 7 hours and she was not getting great roles because her performance was not as progressive as her teachers thought if could be.

In November, Casey began listening to the CD because she was really tired. She popped it into her ipod, crawled into bed and fell to sleep listening to it. She listened to the program and fell to sleep waking up in the morning feeling unusually well.

Each time she listened to it, she fell asleep faster and woke up feeling even more energized.

Now she does not understand guided programs really how they effect her brain, muscles and performance but what she does know is that she feels  rested and ready.

Her teachers noticed her an increase in motivation, a cleaner technique and more presence in her performance.  For the Nutcracker her roles remained the same.

Last week, her teachers said it was time for her to move up to the next level early. She was stronger, more pumped about class and more confident.

Who could believe that improving your dance practice with your eyes closed could really work. Sleep makes a difference.

HINT:  The magic is in the experience, and you can buy Stepping to Sleep here.

Dance Magazine recommended it in June, 2008. They know the importance of sleep.

Sanna Carapellotti, MS CHT

Performance Coach and Hypnotherapist

mentalperformances.com

It's All In Your Head! Article, Dancer Mag., Jan. 2009

It's All In Your Head!  Dancer Magazine, Jan. 2009

By Sanna Carapellotti, MS CHT

Get to Know yourself a little deeper --

DanceMind: Dear Janie: Be your Number 1!

Janie,

It worked out for you!  I am constantly amazed at hind site.  Worry, anticipatory fear, fret and dread can take up a lot of 'life time.' As you look back, was it worth your while?

It is a part of the human condition to experience anxiety, although with great variance. Catch yourself in the act. Ask yourself these questions, "What else can this mean?" "What don't I know right now?"  "Will time tell me what I need to know?"

Worry, and all, are a departure from the present. You are reaching into the future, where there is unpredictability.  We believe that we know all, yet as we move into the upcoming moments life continues to happen around us.

Have you ever noticed that what is in our minds (what we focus on?) is what we look for in our environments?

There is MS. Negative and Doom and there is MS. Positive and Light.

Anyone can find a doom and gloom in the most perfect weather day. 78 degrees, blue skies.

"Ack, it is supposed to rain next week." "I have to mow the grass now. I hate doing that."

Ms Positive and Light stands and appreciates the sun and sky as she moves thru her day. The weather simply is.

Sometimes a simple easy slow breath can return you to the moment so you can ask yourself the

questions above.

Especially if you notice a pattern that disrupts you.

In dance world. You do not know what they are discussing behind the scenes, how things can shift and change.  You must learn to move with the flow and influence your position.

How can you be the best you can be?

Sanna Carapellotti, MS CHT

mentalperformances.com

dancemind: Dear Janie: Yeah!

Very Nice Janie.  I will follow up very soon.

I also want to mention a talkshoe.com webinar on Thursday, Jan 15 at 9:00 EST for an hour. 

Hypnosis for life - Sanna Carp

New Years Resolutions Fizzled out?  Discover the secret to a lasting resolution.

Then we can start the program here thru Talkshoe so it is audio.  Good?  I gotta sleep. Long dayzzzz.

Sanna Carapellotti

Dear Sanna - better...

I did it! Today I found a friend struggling to learn the same pas de duex as me, so we both tried our best to remember it together. I was frustrated because the schedule was misprinted, so I didn't realize we had a full run of the ballet, and therefore the dreaded pas. Anyway my partner didn't actually come in to partner me for whatever reason, but it was okay because I was able to watch more and try my best to get the choreography. I was kind of relieved to not have to rehearse with him because I am so self-conscious and I really was unsure about the steps, but I am also hoping that partnering me isn't so incredibly awful that he is avoiding it. I swear I'm not reading too much into this on purpose, but I can't help wondering.

Anyway after the run I asked the other girl to try to go over the steps again with me, but we were really getting stuck, so together we went and asked the main girl doing the part, and she seemed happy to show us. We just asked her to tell us what was next at a specific part where we were stuck, but she continued to mark through the whole thing with us. It was really nice, and I feel better now. I can go over it with my friend, and if I really want I am less intimidated by the dancer doing the part. Whew.

Then at the end of the day, in my excitement at finishing early, I accidentally made the mistake of being the last person in the studio with the artistic director since I decided to practice a little. Well I ended up having to do the parts I was thrown into the other day with "more energy" and show the foutees I had been practicing. I'm sure it had a lot to do with the fact that my mom had come in to watch the end of rehearsal, but either way the director was satisfied in the end and told me to always do it that way and I am a good girl and a good dancer and very beautiful and if I lose a little more weight I will really be used. The director wants to use me. It's nice to hear I am liked, even if it is a bit of a back-handed compliment. Hopefully this favoratism lasts!

Janie

DanceMInd: Dear Janie: Get clear ...

If you have to ask this dancer tomorrow. Be clear with what you intentions are. The more you ramble on, or the more defensive you are about this request, you sound like you are hiding something. In the ballet world, not good.

SO get clear and then take a few breaths and go ask. 

You cannot control her response, but take charge of how you ask. 

"Mary, I am wondering if you could help me with these parts. I am having trouble (Or I need to review) .... Can you work with me today at 1:00 or tomorrow before rehearsal?"

Let us know -- 

Am planning the dates for this outcome/goal setting.  Spread the word so others can benefit.

Dear Sanna - yes!

I can commit to a chunk of time where I will blog every day, this has just been an extremely busy (and wonderful) week for me. It's funny how working through the holidays makes me oblivious to the new year and everything going on. I haven't even thought about new year's resolutions or things like that. I'll get to it... but this past week has been really great. Work is really intense, because we are working on the program for our next performance, and it's been a while since we did it.

Our teachers are being more demanding with the first piece, so I am working harder trying to get it exactly right and even better than before. Then, the director has been asking me to learn everything lately. I think I am finally winning over the director. There is a pas de duex I am supposed to be learning that is really crazy and unclear. The director made a more experienced dancer come learn it with me, but I am very shy around him, and his English is also limited. It is very hard for me to pick up the choreography, and I asked another dancer who understudies the part for help. She basically said no, she doesn't know it very well, why do I want to learn it, ask the main girl. I am reluctant to ask the other girl, but I might work up my courage tomorrow. It's a sticky situation.

Then I was thrown into two more sections in this piece, where there were somehow spaces. These parts are nothing special, but it's nice that the directore thought of me when there was a space to fill.

I am also in the first and third parts of another piece in the program, which is a lot of dancing, and I am now understudying the middle piece, a pas de duex. Again, I am working with the same guy, but this is slightly better because I have a better idea of the choreography as we are cleaning it.

The last piece I am not in at all, but I learned the part of a girl who is away this week. I went in for the part last week, and instead of being praised for knowing the choreography really well (if I do say so myself!) and never having done the part before, the director just said it wasn't good enough and I need more energy and made us all do it again from the beginning. But today I went in for the missing girl again, and another dancer filled in for the other missing girl with me. When we finished the director said how great it was and told everyone how well we did for going in for the missing girls, and told me specifically "I really like you."

I hope this lasts!

Janie

FOR SALE - College Guide

I have a Performing Arts College Guide for Sale.  Dance. Drama. Music.

If you are interested, Contact me personally.  Sanna@mentalperformances.com

DanceMInd: Dear Janie: Getting clear ...

Hello, Janie,

I am wondering if you are able to commit to posting everyday for a short period of time. We can hash thru some goal/outcome stuff to help you move forward this year.

Remember MOST RESOLUTIONS FAIL!

Why? Because there is no plan, it is driven by will power which fades quickly and the mental focus is on the negative.

Let me know and we'll hope to it.  Tell others too Because this is a good experience to think through what you want. If you are reading this post tell your friends, even if they do not dance. It will be worth it - cause then you'll be sailing .....  YES!

Sanna Carapellotti, MS CHT

Performance Coach and Therapist

mentalperformances.com

PS - New article written by ME coming out in January, Dancer Magazine, Mind-Body Connection

Dear Sanna - Happy New Year!

After a very long run of shows, working 10 days straight without a break, I was in desperate need of some rest! It's very difficult to go so many days, pushing myself during class and then for a 2 hour show. I am literally running around the entire show, because if I am not dancing, I am doing a quick change or standing on stage trying to look animated without being too distracting. By the end, even though I was more comfortable with the choreography, my shoes were completely dead and all my little aches and pains were flaring up. It was so nice to let my muscles settle down a little and sleep in!

My mom came to visit, so she got to see the last two shows and today we had the whole day to spend together. It was really strange not being in the states for new years and watching the ball drop with my old friends and family, and I definitely miss them, but I was also happy to have my mom visiting and spend the new year here with my new friends. It is also very pleasant, for the very first time, not to have to rush back to reality on the first of january. I don't remember the last time I wasn't extremely sad and depressed on new year's day, maybe flying back to my current home, going back to school with tons of homework due or the stress of a new season of ballet, post-nutcracker and post-holidays and post-fun. I know part of the reason was that I really had no holiday break, which is a little sad, but I still had a lot of fun having little parties with my friends between shows. I will have to think about my goals for the year as I recooperate in the next few days...

Happy New Year!

Janie

DanceMInd: Dear Janie: WInter Season

Well, all the Nutcrackers and Winter season performances are over. It is time to stretch out the feet and enjoy a few days off through New Years.  Along with being with family and friends, or even if you are alone, your mind still dances.  

It may be a good time to review what you want and need to do over the upcoming year. Writing it down is a good idea because it materializes your desires, and offers a place for reference. 

It is easy to just float aimlessly without any real direction. 

Most dancers work very hard in the present moment, have dreams of the future and lose the 'meat,'  or process in between. This is where the true growth and action lay. Breaking it down into pieces gives you a path for change. Using visualizations strengthens and moves the process along more quickly too. 

There are many paths to becoming a professional dancer. A one point focus is mandatory. You have to want it. Breathe it. Demand it. Do not take NO for answer.

I spoke with a Mom recently who was crying because her son was not invited to a prestigious dance program. She brought him in for counseling thinking he had self sabotage. 

Through our work, He has realized that he prefers a smaller company where there is a manageable balance of stress and continued opportunity for lead roles.  He has been working beyond his limits, though injuries and rejection. 

Because he was given a 'no' does not mean that he has defined himself by the no. His determination is even stronger because he has realized his direction and clarified where he wants to dance and how. Nice.  

Everyone's path is a little different. The male dancer took this No as an opportunity to get to know what is important to him. So a no can be a YES!

If you have some time in the next few days, do some writing about what you want, what has become important to you over the last year and of course, your dreams.

Happy New Year all around the World!

Sanna Carapellotti, MS CHT

PS - I just finished an article for Dancer Magazine on How to Stop Smoking Using Your Mind Power. Feb issue.

DanceMind: Dear Janie:You Got it!

Yes, take what he says in 'chunks.' Extract what you need to know, what is cliche, incorrect and wrong guidance. Again, you will not change him, yet you can change how you feel and what you accept. 

Try this -- the next time he approaches you and you are not dancing - mirror his movements without being obvious. If he is standing with his arms folded, you can cross your arms lower or cross your legs. If he scratches his nose, brush your cheek. 

This is one way to align subconsciously with someone you do not connect with, yet must have a relationship with. It is sending back a message that is similar and it can create a shift in his behavior.

Many years ago I had a supervisor that was mentally abusive. He would pound people with his photographic memory and intelligence. It was very difficult to consult with him. I mirrored him.  It threw him off, he could not think clearly and cut short the time. The next time we met, he was different, yet still difficult so I did it again subtly and he again could not over power me.

The third interaction he was calmer and we were able to work together.  This is a good way to align with someone to whom you cannot communicate your experience. He would not have understood anything, or would have become very defensive. 

There are more ways to fluff a tutu!

Happy Holidays to you! and Everyone!

Sanna Carapellotti, MS CHT

Sanna

Dear Sanna - at least I'm not left wondering...

The artistic director is rude, nagging, and doesn't know when to stop. Most just try to avoid all contact, because any exchange will inevitably contain something negative. But at least it's all out there so you never have to guess what goes on inside that head. So the other day, I was trying to blend in when the artistic director showed up. The attack came after repeating things a million times in rehearsal, I was trying to let my aching toes air out during the break.

"why are you tired?"
"i'm not tired!"
"what time do you go to sleep? blah blah blah... do you know what to eat? blah blah blah buy this here and cook it, bring a sandwich to ballet. did you bring a sandwich? you are a nice dancer but you could lose more weight. we like you. you are a nice girl. but you're very tall you need to lose some weight. it is very hard to partner you. but i watch you. you are a nice dancer. we see you have something special. you feel more confident now here? remember i watch you. now go eat your sandwich"

but I am learning that pretty much everyone, in the artistic director's mind, could lose a little weight. I know in this profession, I pretty much always need to make sure I am eating right, so I can pretty much discard that part of the conversation, and try to focus on the compliment I possibly heard? They like me. And I am being asked to learn more and more things. I am actually performing a part right now with just 3 other girls, and I am the only new company member of the group. It seems like a pretty special part, actually. All 3 of the other girls have performed principle roles with the company, so it is encouraging to be grouped with them.

Tonight after the show, I got even more feedback. Actually even during, "I watch you. it is better. you pointe your feet. good."

so strange, but I'll take what I can get...

Janie

Dear Sanna - It's all for YOU

We have 5 ballet masters and an artistic director. That is 12 eyes, 6 different opinions, 6 voices, and 4 languages scrutinizing me all at once. Sometimes I feel like my brain is about to explode! It is hard enough to rehearse, thinking about the choreography, music, spacing, feet, legs, body, arms, and head all in the correct place, without the teachers screaming on top of one another, often different things, that I am expected to fix immediately, right then.

I can feel myself tense up, trying to apply all the corrections, and I start to loose my cool. I forget where I am in the choreography. If I'm told to turn out more, I loose my balance. My shoulders go up and I forget to breathe, and I can feel the tears about to come.

At least that's how it was, or how it is on really bad days, but I am learning to just breathe, smile and apply as many corrections as possible. I have seen my fellow dancers react in such a negative way to corrections, and it's really almost embarrassing. Today a teacher was correcting this girl, who was being so stubborn she refused to take the simplest advice, playing dumb and doing ridiculous things. For what? To prove the teacher wrong? To show she couldn't do it correctly?

In a way I understand how I might be tempted to do such childish things sometimes, but it is really better for everyone to just take the correction. As the teachers say again and again, the corrections are for us. They just want us to be better dancers, and that's what we want, too, right? So I should be happy they are giving me the opportunity to improve. If I never get corrections how will I get better? The teachers appreciate when I apply the corrections, too. The scary teacher I often talk about was giving a correction today and began to name names, and when she got to me she actually said I was okay, which is about the biggest compliment anyone could hope for from this teacher!

Anyway I still need to work on listening to 6 people at once, and figuring out which of the conflicting directions I should take, while continuing to dance on the music, but at least I am controlling my temper...

Janie

DanceMind: Dear Janie: Life is Ballet is life.

Bless you my child.  

Dear Sanna - dealing

I know things like this will happen, and I still get upset, but I am learning to let it go more and more quickly. It's bad enough that such horrible words can ruin even a minute of my time. There is no way I am going to let it make me miserable during more of my precious time. You could obviously tell how angry I was when I vented here on the blog, but only one day later I saw another poor soul being tortured, and I realized I had just unfortunately been standing in the line of fire. Anyone who gets too close will be nagged. Nothing positive ever comes out of that mouth. So life goes on.

But even more than that, I am even finding that impossible silver lining in having such an abusive, vocal director. The other day we actually had an hour scheduled with the director just to talk. It was horrible. We were spoken to as if we all wanted to be fat. As if we sat around eating all day and didn't give a damn about how we looked. We were accused of lying and ignoring our boss when asked to lose weight, and they even had the nerve to say that when we get upset or cry because of their harsh words, the tears are out of our own guilt. But everyone knows it's ridiculous, and when it's everyone, it almost bonds us together. The company is able to make light of the situation, just like you said. We laughed about some of the absurd things they said, and since they told us we are no longer allowed to wear black tights and lots of warm-ups in rehearsals to cover up, today we all wore pink tights under our leotards with nothing else for rehearsal and everyone laughed at how silly the whole situation was. And what's even better, we all look great. Not one person looked heavy, and the stupid director even admitted we all looked really good and nobody needs to lose weight. (Another thing that drives me crazy! How could there be such inconsistency?! Why make us miserable one day, just to take it all back the next? It's just stupid games)

Anyway, for me, I find it's best to just act pleasantly naive about the whole thing. I smile innocently and nod, while I picture the director exploding right in front of me. I know any opinion the director may have of me could change any day or not, but it doesn't matter what I do or how I really am. I have no control over the director's distorted point of view, so I will just work my hardest and do what I feel is right.

Janie

DanceMind: Dear Janie: Dealing with Wild Moments

Learning how to cope with difficult people has been written about for decades. It is no different in the ballet world than in corporate and the neighborhood diner. Yes, the stakes can be higher, yet the interactions between people working together particularly among higher ups and those under their watch can range from respectful to downright abusive.

In this case, Janie, you are in the employ of a artistic director whom you present as mean mouth and uncaring.  His talent and knowledge aside, his behavior is unbecoming of a professional.

You have describe  him to blurt out nasty comments, to not listen and I believe moodiness.

When someone abuses their 'power' or authority speaks of their character. Who he is as a person.  There is nothing you can change about that (unless he gets his a@@ kicked a few toomany times and realizes that he needs help.). Clearly there are problems here, Janie, AND IT IS NOT ABOUT YOU, although he directs his anger toward you and others. However, you can guard against him, protect yourself and take out what you need to know from what he says.

The problem is that you believe you have recourse. If you do speak up, you risk parts, your job, being ignored, etc. AGAIN, this speaks of who he is and how he runs his company.

Look, we all throw temper tantrums on occasion. Yet to batter and embarrass someone in front of others is downright disrespectful.  Apologies are forthcoming, but will most likely not happen. Someone like you, would apologize when you act up. YOU ARE TAKING RESPONSIBILITY FOR YOUR BEHAVIOR.

Big Difference.

On the receiving end, you can also TAKE RESPONSIBILITY for your response.  Here are a few things you can do.  (HINT:   You can be ready. It will happen again AND you know it is coming.)

1. Zip up!  In the field of energy medicine (Donna Eden)  there is a simple technique that is protective (and it works!)   If someone wants an explaination email me.

 Here's how -  

1. TAP using your fingers right under the knobby bone of the collar bone about 10 times.   

2. Think a positive thought.   

3.  Next is the ZIP up... Place your hand down where a zipper (yes on your jeans) ends and TAKE A DEEP BREATH while you move your hand all the up the center of your body to the lower lip.  You can do this a few times. You are closing up, protecting yourself.

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This technique is one of many in the Audition CD program ...

Put up a Wall!  Imagination plays a key role here.  Close your eyes NOW.  Ask yourself, "what can you construct that acts as a barrier between you and him?"  Some people use clouds of safety all around them, or God's love, or even a Rainbow Wrap.  Use your visualizing powers to create the experience. Breath it up. Make it really feel powerful and protective.

NOW, when you go to class, you Zip up and protect yourself with your imagery. Try it. You will be surprised.

Anyone who has results, please let us know, too!

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You could also say in a calm tone, "Mr. _________, please do not talk to me that way. I find it offensive and demeaning."

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You could ask for a meeting with you, him and another staff member and voice your concerns.

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You can realize that he is an angry hostile man and take what you need to know and leave his hostilities with him.  It is also a good idea to have feedback from others and to be clear with who you are and what is true for you.  

When you go to dance, you want to look your best and feel comfortable - Consider getting rid of the leotard.

Sanna Carapellotti, MS CHT

www.mentalperformances.com

DanceMind: Dear Janie: Dancing Mad ...

Sanna has been featured in Dance Spirit Magazine (3 times), Dance Studio Life (11/08) and Dance Magazine recommends "Stepping to Sleep" audio for help with sleep problems. Look for her upcoming article in Dancer Magazine, Jan 09!

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Janie,  Thank you. What a day for you!   You certainly know this experience  you described here is common.   Yesterday I thought of you and this 'posted' situation.

I was at the grocery store and overheard a conversation between two employees. One was furious about schedule changes because the wrong schedule was posted. She was pissybecause she was working with a 'slacker' and she was also informed that she was not smiling enough on the floor.  The other employee complained too, "Yeah, they told me that last month - You need to smile more. They need to pay me more to smile more." and on and on......

If you do not believe you have any recourse in the way of speaking up or getting more info, then your choice is to change how you respond to their comments. We can never control how someone delivers a comment. We cannot control the words they choose either. (We all have made that mistake of saying something wrong or hurtful.)

In a professional setting, one is expected to treat others, no matter what position, with undue respect, kindness and regard. That doesn't mean that tempers fly or inappropriate remarks do not flair, that would be very naive of me to say that.  When there is a consistent bullying, or patterns of communications then there are deeper problems then just having a bad day

Personality factors come into play when there is that consistency, meaning that he has problems. You have described this director as being impulsive, rude and demeaning. I am sure there is more but for sake of brevity.   People who do that to others are deeply troubled and very angry individuals. 

What an a@@ this person is. 

Without getting too deep here, if someone is consistently rude and crosses over boundaries, You have  a decision to make, Janie cause you know it is going to happen again.

1. You know your body type.  You know your height, weight, proportions.  "Big Girl" does not describe you. PERIOD. He is very unprofessional to set blame on you especially if your partner is not doing his part and they messed up the choreography. 

 If you were 5 '11, I could see that there would be a need for adjustments. That doesn't even make sense. Again, the word a@@ keeps coming to my mind.

Not all feedback is correct.  In ballet, body image becomes very distorted because of the demands from some "teachers."  What is the percentage of anorexic dancers? 70 - 80%?

You cannot rely on HIM for accurate feedback.

You always have the personal right to decide what the hell to do with such off the wall, bizarre comments -  (Expect more from him)

1. Take him aside and scream in his face. (It could happen. LAst resort.)

2. Run out of the room crying. (Could happen. Could excuse yourself politely)

3. Call a conference with a third person and speak your mind. (Could happen. He could be set straight by a higher up.)

4. Suck it up and have indigestion later. (Not advisable.)

5. Use humor. "Yes, I am HUUUUGE!"

6. Use some avenue to handle it.

Here is an even harder question --

Is there some truth, any inkling of truth to what was said. (EVEN IF  YOU BELIEVE IT in the furthest corners of your brain -- It still doesnot make it OK that he said that to you.). Yes, you have had difficulty with a few pounds, yet you have done a good job of dropping excess. 

This is hard to look at, I know.  You have worked hard at this issue. So stay with me and ask yourself for the sake of honesty without passing judgement or being critical. Because if YOU BELIEVE it, then you may need to change YOUR BELIEF SYSTEM, not necessarily your body.

Do you hear what I am saying?  You may need to change your belief system about your body.

2. Do you accept his remark, or do you leave it with him. (You know -- "I am rubber you are glue what you say bounces off me and sticks to you.") You do not want echos of THAT in your brain.  DO NOT INTERNALIZE his remark. This man has problems. 

Say something like, "I love my body." I work hard to stay slim and strong."  What do you believe, and what can you say in your mind when this  happens to counter what he is saying.

Do not let his comment take away your esteem.  Be ready for it.

If you allow it to become personal, it becomes personal.  You can leave it with him. Like a pie in the face. 

I would really like to hear form others who have had this problem of being spoken to with disrespect for a any reason.

I will add a technique for you tomorrow that will help you when this happens.  

Next time you will be ready.  Did I say a@@?

Love ya -

Sanna Carapellotti, MS CHT

Mentalperformances.com

Dear Sanna - so.much.anger.

I was actually having an almost boring week, as far as ballet goes, to the extent that I couldn't even really choose anything to write about. It was almost too good to be true, so I wasn't really surprised when it was ruined by my stupid, mean, nagging, b*tch of an artistic director! (Sorry, but this is really my only chance to let it all out)

First of all, it was the first time rehearsing a ballet since a terrible partial performance a few weeks earlier. We hadn't even rehearsed enough to perform the cut version of this ballet, and it was pretty much a disaster. Like most things here, I considered it a good experience, trying to figure out what I was doing in a stressful situation for which I was not prepared, but that's really not the point of this story...

So we were rehearsing an especially sticky part that never really worked quite right, and although I know it's not nice to point fingers, my partner wasn't exactly helping matters. We had already had several private rehearsals with just the two of us, where the teacher tried dancing with him and actually did blame him for pulling me off my leg. Then during this most recent rehearsal, we discover we were all taught the wrong choreography, so it's been even harder than necessary. So we're all trying to adapt to the changes, with not enough space, bad partners, and short tempers. I also happened to be wearing an especially unflattering leotard, since my other was completely soaked after class with the crazy strict teacher I'm sure I've mentioned in the past.

In waltzes none other than our nutcase director, only to see my frustration when my partner cannot even remember the changes in the choreography. Just to add some fuel to the fire, the director basically tells me it is impossible to partner me because I'm a big girl (I'm told that ALL the time. even when it's not necessarily meaning I'm fat. Apparently they just think I'm so big here) AND that I've gained a lot of wait.

GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR

first of all, UNTRUE. I have been told to lose weight here several times, and most times I agreed, even if it was ridiculous the way I was told days later, as if that is enough time to change my body. But last time I was told to lose a certain amount of weight, I lost that and more, so at the moment I actually weigh less than requested. The director is so stupid, not being able to tell the difference between an unflattering leotard and weight gain!! And I really think the cruel words might have also been just for the sake of hurting my feelings or playing games with me. It's not that I believe that I am fat, it's that I know the director may see me that way, and what the director thinks is unfortunately very important for the sake of my career. It is so infuriating!

And I know I am not in denial, because I know my body AND people have come up to me and told me what the director said was completely out of line. I just hate being nagged and criticized all the time with no chance to ever stick up for myself or explain or even ask a freaking question! The whole rehearsal I was actually trying to ask for clarification about the choreography but everyone was just ignoring me! I just get SO SO mad about the whole situation.

But I am breathing and thinking logical thoughts and getting through. I know in my mind what is right and that it will all blow over and be fine, but I just hate how the director chooses someone and something to pick on and will not cease until there is a new person to bully. I will just have to wait it out until it is someone else's turn, and for the meantime try to block out all the b.s.

Janie

DanceMind: Dear Janie: Dancing ...

Sanna has been featured in Dance Spirit Magazine, Dance Studio Life Magazine and Stepping to Sleep has been recommended by Dance Magazine, June 2008.

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In your recent post you mentioned thinking during dance.  Let's give some attention to that in this post. It is a common approach to dancing that can be problematic.

Think back --  What is the common denominator of those dance occasions when you were 'on it,' 'in the zone,' 'unconscious,' or 'not knowing what happened?"  You know, you could not have done better. It felt strong. You were on your marks. Your energy was high. Your nailed it.

Thinking nothing.

You let go.  You trust that you have learned, rehearsed, and are ready.

There was no direction. The training took place earlier, now you are in performance mode.

Thinking when you are performing returns you to the studio in class where you are learning.

In order to excel up in your higher range possibility, you have to stop the thinking.  When the curtain goes up Janie, you must be ready to 'perform.'  

Understand that thinking slows down the body. It interferes with the Central Nervous System and the body can get confused. You are moving faster than you can think about what you are doing.  The body can move on its own once you are taught.

Think about walking. Do you say ... right foot, left foot ... swing those arms ... etc

Or how about speaking? Do you spell each word? or Think of your sentences before you speak them? No. Unless you are making a speech.  

You trust and you do it.

Same with dance performance, including auditions.

Let me know what you think, Janie. (or anyone else reading too)

To Your Best,

Sanna Carapellotti, MS, CHT

mentalperformances.com

Dance Mind: Dear Janie, Proud of you!!!

Sanna has been featured in Dance Spirit, Dance Studio Life and Stepping to Sleep has been recommended by Dance Magazine, June/2008.

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You said so many good things in your last post.  I will recap and expound on a few now.

1. Thanksgiving.  I know that where you live there is no Thanksgiving celebration. How can you take a moment in your day to offer gratitude for what you do have right where you are and back here in the US?  This is a good time to remember precious times, ie parties with friends, Thanksgiving dinners as a child, your favorite dish, family events, how far you have traveled in miles AND maturity. 

Create your own meal. Teach the dancers where you live now the joy of Thanks - Giving!  That would be a really nice experience for you and your new friends! Offer them a piece of our culture.  You can start your own traditions. Just as immigrants traveled here to the USA and continued their traditions.

I will be sending love your way tomorrow - and thanks for being here with me and our readers.

2. PREPARING FOR PERFORMANCE.  I am so happy to hear that you are tuning into FOODS that nourish your body and mind for performance.  We all have different needs, taste and thresholds, yet,  if we all ate consciously and powerfully we would be more efficient and successful. Food makes a difference. For those of you who do not think it is important, make a few changes and see what happens!

Even in my work, I know what I can eat (whole simple foods) to be highly intuitive and effective. I plan for it and do not deviate. Just like you, Janie, I owe my best to client who pay me for services. Every sessions demands attention because every session is healing and very empowering.

In the Audition CD program is a review of this and a place where you can put all the foods for performance that work for you ... Pay attention. See how you feel. What works and gives you the energy you need.

Consider - chicken, eggs, grains, fruits and veggies. Lots of water of course. Save the high calorie drinks, burgers, sodas and junk foods for another time.

Stop eating SUGAR!  Sugar can increase jumpiness in the body (Central Nervous system takes a huge hit). Memory can be impaired. (YES!)  When the body does not feel right then the mind and emotions feel the dis-ease.

Times when I am back stage I see so many cookies and cupcakes. Not to mention weight gain, it is best to stay away from those sweets.

Pay attention! to what you put into your mouth - if you want to perform your best. Diet makes a difference.

I am going to close for now and address the other things later.

I do want to mention that I am gearing up for audition season myself. (as a Performance Specialist!) If you feel worried and afraid, there is no need to feel that away about something you love and live for. If you need assistance to clear out fear so you can be pure power, call me. We can work on the phone. (I have clients all over the country!) There is no reason for you to continue in that way.

Gotta love ya!

Sanna Carapellotti, MS CHT

www.mentalperformances.com

PS == "Bring on the Butterflies!"  Dance Studio Life Magazine, Nov 2008. Read Sanna's interview!  It is not available on line yet but it is in the magazine!

Dear Sanna - staying focused

I think all this performing experience is really good for me. I am finding out a lot about myself and how to best prepare for and perform a piece. I am noticing which foods sit best in my stomach and give me energy for the show, what I need to do in a warm-up class in order to prepare myself for a show, how to go over things in my mind so I feel prepared to perform, and how to focus my mind. Last week we performed a piece we had only finished the day before and barely rehearsed. It was obviously going to be a mess, and on top of our being under-rehearsed, the stage was tiny, which made spacing even more difficult. But we pulled together and composed ourselves as well as we could. I went over the steps in my head a few times and talked about the order of the show and when/where quick changes occurred to make sure we knew what we had to do before the show. There were actually two performances in one day. The first was quite messy, but I felt I had rehearsed the movements enough in my mind that I was prepared as I could have been, even if I was dodging scenery, wings, and other people when dancing full-out on the stage made it seem even smaller than before.

I also found it quite helpful to go through the steps in my head, applying any corrections I get during class or rehearsals. Not only is it important to take corrections and really work on things to be a better dancer, but when I know specific things like this to think about while I am dancing, my mind is less likely to wander at all, let alone to those negative thoughts that psych me out and result in mistakes.

If my mind does wander, I try to shake it off, too, like you mentioned. I do find it hard once the thought is in my head to stop it, so it is usually better not to let my mind go there at all.

I am having a great time with lots of performing and exploring and making new friends and all of this! It's hard and sometimes sad to think about my family getting ready for Thanksgiving back home, and all my friends who will be visiting during the holidays. It will also be the first time ever I will not see my friends and family on New Year's, which will be sad, but I know I will see them eventually and luckily modern technology allows us to keep in touch pretty well. I really am making great friends here, though, so being away during the holidays could be much, much, worse. We all knew going into this career there would be sacrifices...

Janie

Sanna in Dance Studio Life Magazine!

Does your heart race before a performance? D0 you feel jumpy? Have butterflies?

Then you need to read "Bring on the Butterflies in Dance Studio Life Magazine, Nov. 2008

I was interviewed by Nancy Wozney. 

It is a good article to share with your dance mates.

It will help you to understand that your heart and knees are just excited to dance! Read it! Your dance teacher may have it. Ask her!

Sanna Carapellotti, MS CHT

mentalperformances.com

DanceMind: Dear Janie: Talk, Talk Talk

I want to tell you this -- Your thoughts can be managed. Of course thoughts influence how you feel. EVERY thought changes your physiology and is linked to an emotion. Stressful thoughts trigger fear and anxiety cycles.  

THOUGHT STOPPING -- is an easy way to stop negativity, rants, fear based thoughts, anything that does not support the possibility of a wonderful performance.

AS SOON AS you become aware of thoughts , say STOP either silently or quietly -- and move your body around. (this breaks the physical state). Taking charge of these repetitive that are habits puts you in charge. You might have to repeat it many times because these thoughts can take over. 

This is a simple but highly effective technique. Any time thoughts interfere, use it.

Sanna Carapellotti, MS CHT

Dear Sanna - mistakes

As far as my conscious actions regarding the show and the music mishap, I must say I was pleased with how I handled it, as a result of doing exactly what you said. After past experiences with reacting to things on stage, I realized that in this sort of situation the best thing to do is ignore it, or pretend nothing is wrong on stage. However, I wish I had not gotten so worked up about the whole thing. I could feel my muscles tensing as I struggled to hold the position. Although it is not a comfortable position at any time, it was somehow harder in this situation and my mind was racing about the possibilities of what could happen. In a way, I did psych myself out a little, because when we finally did perform the piece, I was very shaking and scared and my mind was still buzzing a little with negative thoughts or fears about messing up. I think this always tends to happen during shows, but I wish I could avoid these thoughts, because usually the only time the fears actually come true is when I am thinking about them.

On a different note, we have a guest choreographer here setting a new piece. The choreographer watched a few classes and one of the shows, and then worked with us all after class one day to choose people for the piece. I was not expecting at all to be picked, because we knew only a small number of girls and boys would be in it, and there are more than that number of girls that would be the obvious choice over me. I thought this was a good thing, because I wasn't too too worked up during the "audition" and classes, although I can never be completely normal in such a situation. Anyway I thought I did okay, for me. Then casting went up, and the assumed girls were chosen, but a second cast was also there. I hadn't considered this possibility, and when my name was not on the second cast list, either, I must say I was very disappointed. No I did not consider myself among the top third of the girls in the company, but I had hoped I was at least in the top 60 percent.

Anyway I debated with myself about staying anyway for a chance to see and try some different choreography, etc, but decided it was weird for me to just stay for a guest choreographer's rehearsal for which I was not chosen. But on my way out, the artistic director stopped me and gave me some corrections. The director was apparently surprised I was not chosen and thought I danced beautifully and I look like a dancer (something I had not really heard before). The director did say that I really need to work on using my head and upper body more, and that audience members noticed, too, so perhaps that may explain why I wasn't chosen for the choreography piece. Anyway there was also some hinting that it was a shame I was not working with the guest, so I asked if it would be disrespectful to go late to the rehearsal that was going on at the time and learn the choreography. The director encouraged it and I am happy I went. Even though I felt silly and had to endure the thoughts I imagined going through the heads of the other dancers, I felt good knowing I was working on my weaknesses. Feeling sorry for myself doesn't help anyone. And I think the conversation with the artistic director was encouraging, as well.

Janie

DanceMind: Dear Janie: Mistakes

There was a little girl who was seven years old who took ballet. It was her recital. She stood on the stage with her class, the music started and the teacher in the wings lead the class to dance a piece that was not theirs! This seven year old girl stood her ground. She did not move from her mark and  we watched her motioning to the teacher that she was doing the wrong piece. Finally after about thirty seconds the teacher realized her mistake, stopped and restarted.  It makes for a memorable 'human' experience.

Janie, you have to know and accept that 'things' will happen during a performance. Once you accept that, then you are more able move with the snags. It is unpredictable, Uncertain and yet probable. ALTHOUGH EVERYONE IS DOING THEIR BEST.

It might make for a good discussion to ask others what kinds of things have happened and how did they handle them.

Audience members show great empathy and care when things happen so it is not really about them.  Your job is to be well rehearsed and ready for performance! (and that includes responding to incidence.) 

If you 'react,' here is what you can do ... Review in your mind, what you could have done differently. Practice the 'emotional' correction several times.  What you will notice that this gives you the vision to be creative in your solutions.  Each situation  calls for a different response. Sometimes it may be that you must stand still until you are notified. Maybe you know you must get out of the way. 

Catch your breath by deliberately putting your attention on it. Breath a couple of times at that higher rate and then gradually slow it down.  You will recover more quickly and be ready to continue with the performance.

Apologize. If necessary make an apology to the appropriate folks if you  make a mistake. Taking ownership and showing accountability speaks very loud of your integrity.

You certainly do not want to go into a performance worried about something happening, yet it is the nature of the beast. Things can go awry. Yet, a concerted effort to stay focused, to help if you can, manage yourself - cause the show will eventually go on.

What do you think you could have done differently?

Part of the maturation of being a dance professional as I guess it is for any type of work is responsibility and accountability.

It sounds to me as if you did a nice job, yet it also sounds like there can be some tweaking you can do to build your inner mental muscle.

Sanna Carapellotti, MS CHT

www.mentalperformances.com

Dear Sanna - performing

The other night was my first time performing a piece where I start on stage standing in a less-than-comfortable position as the curtain comes up. I always get some butterflies before shows, and usually feel like I have to go to the bathroom, but this is normal so I was trying to relax and calm my usual nerves when the stage manager called places. So the curtain goes up and I immediately fight the feeling that I'm going to tip over backwards, and regain my focus and balance. Then the music starts. But not at the beginning, right in the middle of the piece. So we all just stand there and try not to react until the music stops and starts again in the same (wrong) place. Then the lights go out. And back on. And off and the curtain goes down. Great start. So we all kind of laugh it off while they work out the glitch and then everything is fine and we start for real. But I was so drained from trying to hold the position and my nerves were fried! It was definitely a less-than-perfect show after that. Nothing went terribly wrong, but the whole thing was very shaky and did not feel as clean as it could've been.

The next piece was not perfect either, but was so much fun! There were actually parts that did not go well at all, but for some reason I had such fun on stage! The ironic part is that this is in no way my favorite choreography or music or anything else, for that matter. I HATE rehearsing it, and I really just generally dislike the piece. Go figure.

So it wasn't a terrible show, but there is definitely room for improvement. I think I am learning and growing a lot, though, from these experiences. I feel that past experiences like this have taught me how to deal with such things. As I stood and listened to the music malfunction, I recalled past experiences of having to improvise on stage. In the past, I regretted reacting to such things and I remember thinking a more professional response would have been to pretend not to notice. So that's what I did this time, and it was definitely appropriate. I am learning more and more about how to deal with the bad things that inevitably happen in the performing arts, and I am learning more and more about myself and how to control my own reactions.

Janie

DanceMind: Dear Janie: The Audition

Continued discussion -

The idea of doing your best is misunderstood. One often thinks of perfection.  

Every day is an opportunity to improve your ability to dance. 

What if you have a difficult day? You feel crampy and tired. You are in the middle of exams. You just can't get it right.  Your mind is racing. Your face is scrunched.

How do you manage? Push yourself harder? 

It is one day.

Give this some consideration. Back to you ... with some tips to get thru a crazzzyyyy day like this.

Sanna Carapellotti, MS CHT

mentalperformances.com

DanceMind: Dear Janie: The Audition

Janie, You realize that even being a professional dancer you have to be your mark every day. You do not audition per se, however, your directors are watching, considering and looking thru a creative lense to determine which roles are best suited for the company.

Oops - My appointment is here ...

Back in touch ...

Sanna

DanceMind: Dear Janie: The Audition

This is the time of year Auditions begin. However, many schools have internal for performances, such as the Nutcracker. For som dancers just thinking about an audition tightens the core and brings on tears. Many of the worries are silent to their teachers, parents and even to self.

One client, Maggie had severe cramps before EVERY audition.  She THOUGHT it was Hormonal and fought thru them. Her auditions did not go to well.  In session she discovered that the cramps were fear based - "I messed around in class."  "I am not good enough."  

We actually calmed her cramps thru a high powered conversation that PROVED that she was good enough, that she did work hard and COULD get in with a stronger presence.

It worked, no more cramps, and she got into on of the top summer programs. She also listened to Audition Excellence for one week before every audition. This help to recondition her mind.

SANNA'S COMMENT:  You must look beyond the audition experience, meaning before and after. It is not just what occurs at the TIME of the audition. 

Yes, you do want to do well, yet consider this - everyday is an audition. Your teachers are observing, guests take note because they want to see who is consistent, strong, present, has a winning attitude, and who can learn choreography, etc. If you do not push yourself in class, how can you expect to do any better at an audition. If you approach an audition with the certainty that you have put your best foot forward, then you are free to do your best. If you KNOW that you have not been paying attention, missing class, etc, then that guilt can manifest as a 'symptom,' like Maggie. Of course "she would develop the belief - I am not good enough. In reality she was not and the outcome affirmed her belief.

She was playing a mind game and not taking her classes time seriously enough.

If you practice doing the best you can do at that moment (and push a bit) You will be accustomed to knowing what that feels like for you. Then when you go to an audition, you will have already been 'auditioning' and enjoying the feel of dancing within your best range.

Sanna Carapellotti, MS CHT

Mentalperformances.com

DanceMind: Dear Janie: In Pieces.

Sorry I have not on the blog. The trip to Europe for 10 days put me behind and this week was catch up.  In the next few days I have several things that need to be accomplished here. 

1. responding to your posts, of course.

2. I am having a drawing for the book I have listed below as one to read.

3. We need to talk about auditioning as we are moving into that season. Hey you are NOT auditioning this year. Except now, every day is an audition of sorts.

4. Look for a a discussion on talkshoe.com about audition. Nine Tips To Your Best Audition.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I do have a question - You have a way of pushing yourself beyond what most people can handle.

• Do you think that this is required of dancers, ballet expecially?
  
• How do you know when you have to stop and care for yourself?  For example, burning, blistered, painful toes can lead to infections which would most likely sideline you for a few days and set a recovery period.  When  do you draw the line?  A Broken bone? A gaping wound? Obvious illness?
• It is an interesting dilemma for performers, musician, athletes.  How many push thru a game or performance with serious injuries that would send most people to bed.

I think your opinion matters. Lets discuss this back and forth. With you being a professional ballet dancer, I think a lot of the dancers here would like to hear what happens within you that allows you to continue.

• Also, is it different now that you are a professional?

Sanna Carapellotti, MS CHT

mentalperformances.com

Dear Sanna - more irony

So the artistic director decided to choreograph a new piece, even though we have PLENTY to work on right now, with many shows in the near future. I was one of the "lucky" chosen ones, and I came to realize this was not necessarily such a great thing as the more experienced company members seemed to slip out. I know any dancing experience is good, and it's good to work with the director, but this piece is just bad, and sometimes I think it is truly impossible to make a good impression while dancing this choreography.

That said, today was an especially draining day of rehearsals, ending of course with the new piece. By then my toes hurt so badly I seriously considered asking to take my pointe shoes off, but I figured I might as well just suck it up, since the choreography is so sloppy anyway that if it hurt that bad I could probably get away with not doing everything en pointe. I really don't like to have to ask to do things on flat, or really draw any attention to my weaknesses. I don't think it looks good, I don't think directors want to hear it, and it's not going to kill me to keep my shoes on for one more hour. No pain no gain, right? And to tell the truth, I was wearing my shoes a lot longer and in a lot more pain last year...

So in rehearsal today I was just desperately trying, as usual, to do what the director wanted, with "more energy!" yet still somehow natural like we aren't trying, while still keeping my technical integrity. This is nearly impossible, but I still try. Anyway we somehow made it to the end of the rehearsal and in the final run I actually messed up really badly near the end and skipped a bit. I dance a lot in this piece with two other girls, and they were right. It wasn't really a big deal. The piece is a mess and it was the first time we had added the new section I messed up. But the artistic director pointed to one of the other girls and said "you couldn't do it with the music" and I said there was a little extra time, because I thought it was directed at all of us. Then the director told me how well I did. But I was very wrong and dancing very badly. Like I said, I was really tired. I just don't understand! When I am working my butt off I am told I look like I am marking. But when I'm exhausted and can't remember the choreography, I am loved!

There are some things I will just never understand.

Janie

Dear Sanna - what we think we want

It's so funny how we can be so wrong about what we want sometimes. The other day we were all so excited when we saw the schedule, thinking it would be a nice easy day with two actual breaks (meaning longer than 5 minutes). Most days it seems like we don't have a second to rest or think in between rehearsals, and although we don't think about it much during, by the end of the day we are exhausted! But as the day dragged on, we all got lazier and less happy, and by the end we were all complaining about how it was such a horrible day because we didn't do anything! It's funny how what we thought would be a nice easy day turned out to be kind of a bore. It feels like we haven't accomplished anything when there is so much wasted time. Funny how that works. Maybe we just like complaining...

But speaking of free time, I am starting to feel more and more comfortable here and making more friends and more plans. It's really nice to be busy for a change. However, I am also starting to think about things I "should" do, such as work on learning the language, or maybe look into more college courses. I promised myself (and my family for that matter) that I would keep up with some sort of studies. I think it is very important to learn the language here, even if I am only staying for a year. It would be a great thing to take away from this experience, plus it will be very useful while I am here. I think maybe I will start setting goals for myself as far as that goes. I am using Rosetta Stone, a language computer program, so maybe I will try to master a lesson each week. We'll see how it goes...

Janie

DanceMind- Dear Janie, Hello!

I am at this moment in the same part of the world with you, not close enough for a visit as it would take a several hour plane ride, however, I am closer than the USA.

Your description of 'super hard teacher class' is amusing. Burning toes, very difficult and demanding ... Most people would shake their heads wondering 'What joy could there possibly be in that?'

When burning passion is enlivened (in other words, You are doing what you love, have to do) your threshold rises and you embrace the whole experience. The burning toes and aching body, long hours, demands AND the bright lights, applause and beautiful costumes.

You have to put all your eggs in one basket to be good.

Back to you. We ar eleaving this area to travel to one of the most historic cities in the world. Hmmmm where could I be?

Love to all -
Sanna Carapellotti, MS CHT
mentalperformances.com

PS - Auditioning? Getting ready for a performance? Ck out the Performance Package on the on live store. Janie loves it; Clarissa, loves it and so does Amanda.

Dear Sanna - owwww :)

We had our super hard scary teacher again for class today, which makes me really happy because I hope that means this will become a regular thing. We were afraid she would only be doing rehearsals for a while, since there is a lot of rehearsing for her to do, aside from teaching class as well. Then on top of that, we had our hardest, longest rehearsal first, so we started our day with two really difficult things.

By the end of the first rehearsal today my toes felt that stinging, sharp pain that only results from hours in pointe shoes. And there were still TWO more rehearsals to go! The second rehearsal was just torture, and I was afraid to even put my shoes back on after the 5 minute break before the last rehearsal, but somehow I managed to go en pointe long enough to get through. I must say though, the fact that my toes hurt almost makes me sort of happy in a weird way. Because I know that I am working really hard and the more often I wear pointe shoes, the longer I can wear them before I get to that painful point. Almost like I build up an immunity to it, so it's not all bad (hence the smiley after owww).

So it's nice to think I am being challenged here and hopefully improving, because that really was one of my main goals in coming here. I wanted to get experience, improve, hopefully make a little money, and be able to add a professional dancing job to my resume. So it seems like I am accomplishing all of these things and more. Even when I am feeling down, it's nice to remind myself of these things.

Janie

Dear Sanna - Piece Struggles

When I first begin working with a new company or new teachers or dancers, I always feel uneasy about certain things at the beginning. Specifically here, I felt very distant from my fellow dancers. I would come in and say hi to people, and they would respond, but nothing more. If there was a group of people talking, it would always be in their language, so it was awkward to join in. It would have been hard enough to invite myself into a conversation in English, but it is impossible to know when to interrupt the gibberish. Even worse was I didn't have much to say.

Other times, I would be speaking alone with one kind soul who would talk to me a little in English, and another native would come over and start speaking their language and it was like I didn't exist anymore. I thought it would never get better, but now I am finding I wish they would speak more in their own language so I could learn.

Another frustration also dealt with language. The teachers NEVER give important information in English. I find myself completely confused after a 5 minute explanation, and it seems like nobody can explain what I should be doing. Many times I would be asked impatiently why I didn't have my shoes on or why I was on the wrong side of the studio, when there was absolutely no reason I should know what to do. Finally I am starting to pick up enough of the language where I can at least decipher what I should do, or I have the intuition to guess. If not, at least I know who to ask or follow. At the beginning, I never thought I would be able to understand one word, but I am finding my vocabulary expanding each day.

I am also learning my teachers, so I am better at picking up the combinations, even when they are unclear (more often than not). I am even used to the oh-so-slippery floors!

Is that what you meant by piece struggles? Hope so hehe

Janie

Dear Sanna - Roommates

Living so closely with someone can be tough, especially when we work together as well. But it seems like communication is really key. In past experiences, I found that the more that goes unsaid between roommates, the more tension builds up. In my case now, we are really open about everything. We aren't afraid to get down and dirty and discuss even really unpleasant or nitpicky things. Sometimes I feel silly breaking things down to the dollar, when it comes to sharing expenses, but if I am really precise about it I hope it will prevent either of us from feeling cheated. It seems obsessive, but I think it may be necessary, because when we aren't exact about it I either end up feeling like I got the short end of the stick or I end up over compensating when it seems like I got the better end of the bargain.

I have also been building up my network of friends other than my roommate, so it is nice to know I have other people to talk to if there is a roommate issue, or just if I need a break. One really good friend of both my roommate and I sometimes even acts as a bit of a mediator between us. When we all get together sometimes it's really nice to just talk about everything and anything with a third perspective.

At the moment, I am trying to find my balance between being overly sensitive to my roommate and sacrificing my own needs and being selfish about what I want. I think mostly I need to be a little more assertive, because I often find myself nodding in agreement to what others suggest, even if it's not exactly what I want. However, I would hate to make others feel that way, and I seem to be much less picky and kind of indecisive sometimes, so it's not necessarily bad for me to have an assertive roommate.

Janie

DanceMind: Dear Janie: Piece Struggles

Tell us/me about the initial piece struggles you mentioned. That is a common experience. Please talk about YOUR experience.

Back to you tomorrow --

Sanna

Dear Sanna - today

Our crazy, scary, REALLY strict teacher taught class today and it was amazing! It was so refreshing to have a really challenging class, and the fact that I got through was encouraging, because I often fear I am becoming like so many lazy company members I have seen in the past. I hope we have this teacher more often, since this is the first time in weeks. I think it will be really good for us as a company, and her class really inspires me to work harder.

I also heard some encouraging words from the artistic director about a piece I initially really struggled with, so that is also good news! In this company, we are all encouraged to learn as many things as possible, because if anyone ever gets injured or something happens, anyone who shows they can do the part could go in. That said, there are still specific things people are told to learn, even if they will not necessarily perform, and I am happy to see that I am being told to learn more and more. It's nice to know they see me potentially dancing more here.

By the end of the day, we were all exhausted. It was uncharacteristically dark, and we were rehearsing later than normal, and the focus started to dwindle. But it was actually really fun in a way! The company felt almost bonded together, not really by a common enemy, since we weren't necessarily mad or against anyone. But we all felt the same tired, hungry, ready-to-go-home feeling, and everyone was being kind of silly and chatty and it was the first time I actually felt really close with a lot of people in the company. It was really nice, and just proves what I keep saying, time makes everything better! It's not like some break through moment made me feel at home here, or friendly with the company members, it's just that over time we have become closer. I know at times it seems like you will never be friends with certain people or feel you belong, but patients goes a long way.

Janie

DanceMind: Dear Janie: That's it!

This is the energy that is who you are.  Although this is brief, give some thought to how this love 

helps you get thru difficult moments. It is a commitment. Body, Mind and Spirit.  The dark and the lights.  The confines of choreography and the freedom to express your personal quality. The beauty and sweat ...

Roommates is a good topic.

Gotta sleep ---

Sanna

Dear Sanna - Living the Dream

It's true. I am doing exactly what I want to do. It's like getting paid for my favorite hobby, like my dad getting paid for his leisurely bike rides after work. That's why I always knew I had to go for it while I have the chance, so I will never feel like I missed my chance to do what I love, like those people you described hearing about your daughter's career.

I am so happy to get up every morning and go to work. I LOVE taking ballet class. It's just the most perfect way I can think of to begin each day, even when it's not the best class. I can't think of many people who have the opportunity to start every day with their favorite activity. It's amazing. And I love my coworkers, which helps a lot. I've always felt a strong connection to my fellow dancers - I think it takes a certain type of person to go after a career in classical ballet, so it's nice to be around those people at my job and chat and have fun during breaks.

We have really been having a lot of fun bonding and becoming more comfortable with each other, spending so much time together touring and rehearsing. It really is like a family. And the people I complain about work the same way. It's like family, of course certain things will start to get on my nerves, but I love them deep down. I've even made a little progress with my roommate, discussing some of the things that really bother me, and letting other things go when I realize they don't really matter.

Janie

DanceMind: Dear Janie: let's talk about dance --

Dance is an everyday experience. When you are not dancing you thinking about choreography, roles, previous performances, improving turns, class last week, dreams, conversations ... Dance maintains a steady presence in your life.  It fills you. You have to dance.

I am continually amazed by the number of strangers, friends and family who are fascinated by my daughter's dance career. (she is a professional ballet dancer.) ( I think sometimes people feel obligated to ask "Where is your son/daughter at college?") Rather than the usual response of 'she is at such and such of college'  I watch their eyes brighten and notice a rise of interest that draws more questions about her career path, her work ethic and discipline, her determination. People are drawn into the story, want to hear about her dancing.

It is awe inspiring for me to speak of her. 

Yet there is another aspect to this  friendly discussion that is worth mentioning.

I wonder how many people are really living their dreams.  Following their passion. Filling their moments with what inspires them. Sharing their gifts with others.  Feeling juiced about what they do. get excited talking about what they do ...

It is almost as if they (strangers, friends and family) live vicariously thru her in that moment, as they listen to the story of dedication, of commitment about  someone who followed (insisted on) her dream of becoming a ballet dancer.  There is  elation and admiration for her, a 'good for her' cheer.  yet I detect a hint of personal resignation.

Often times there is an addendum to the conversation, "Yeah, I wanted to be a musician, an artist .... a designer ... a potter ... a writer ....

I often hear of those who regret not pursuing a career in the arts because of family demands or ideas of living a life of poverty, or something or someone that steered them toward 'sensible' work.  Maybe they gave it up or pushed it aside. Years later, the suppressed creativity surfaces as a depression or deep sadness or loss and regret.

I could not imagine suppressing my daughter's passion for ballet. I could see it in her eyes. I watch her take class even when she was not feeling well, or in lieu of socializing.  I see her taking care of herself to dance her best. I sat with her while she sewed her shoes. Helped her through very dark moments. Applauded her triumphs. Comforted her when she was not selected as a dream fairy (age 11).

How could I have selfishly stopped her quest when her effort was so great. That energy cannot be contained. It must be expressed.

 Little did I know that her story may possibly give others a message of hope to follow their own dreams, no matter what age.

Mark is one such story that draws attention. 

Mark is 53. He started taking ballet 4 years ago. A professional man, his family and friends are shaking their heads, "Mark, what are you doing?  Why are you dancing? Are you crazy?"

He is passionate, loves the feel of ballet movements thru his body and is determined to perform one performance.  I am so inspired by him, my daughter, "Janie," and all of you who persist. Dance - you have to.  

"I can't imagine not dancing. It is my life." Spoken by a dancer just like you ---

Sanna Carapellotti, MS CHT

Performance Specialist and Hypnotherapist

mentalperformances.com