Dear Sanna - :)

I was so happy on my way to class yesterday. It was just perfect - there were good songs on the radio, the sun was shining, the weather was beautiful, and I was recalling what a good week I've had. Besides taking class and teaching, I've spent time with one of my best friends, seen a number of long-lost friends, and accomplished most of the things on my list of things to do before leaving the states. One of these was sharing my annual banana split with my friend, and I went to the midnight release of Breaking Dawn, Stephanie Meyer's 4th book in a serious I became obsessed with this summer. I'm trying to wait to start it until I leave so I can read on the long plane ride, since I could read this book for hours without realizing how much time has passed.

Anyway, I guess this good mood just really set me up for a good class, because even though I wasn't happy with the amount of time I had to stretch before class, it was great! It was the first time since I've been back from my time off that I felt like a ballerina. Even though I'm still not completely back in shape, the quality of my movements felt much smoother and professional, and I did more turns than I've done in weeks! I feel great having had that class before I leave.

Janie

Dear Sanna - anger management

I swear I'm not an angry person who hates the world! I was just ranting about small children. But I really do like them and I will miss them all. I even spent the entire evening baking cookies for them, time that should have been spent packing! Oops. It will be okay though, since I starting packing SO ridiculously far in advance, it will be no sweat getting it done in time. I was just trying not to be the procrastinator that I always am.

Today we had a guest teacher, who I've had before, and is one of my favorite people in the world. It was hilarious and fun and I just loved it. It was also so nice to see all the old friends who showed up to take his class. It did make me feel REALLY old though to see some of these "little girls" bigger than me. I still picture them as 3 foot tall munchkins terrorizing the studio. And now they're driving themselves to ballet. Crazy. Anywho I think that class was just what I needed and I'm really excited to make the very most of my last days here.

Janie

Dear Sanna - one week!

I AM SO SICK OF TAKING CLASS WITH CHILDREN!! I hate the cramped studios, made a million times worse by the too-many-girls crammed in there with absolutely no sense of personal space or respect for their elders! Not that I want to stand front center - that's the last place I want to be when I'm trying to get back into shape - but at least they could have the courtesy to let me choose where to stand, such as off to the side in the back with a little space. Has nobody told them the art of staggering? And they talk SO much in class! Not only is it rude to the teacher, but I want to hear what they have to say, or practice, or just have 2 seconds of peace and quiet for myself!

...don't get me wrong - I love the girls, but I just CAN'T WAIT to take company class again. It will be great.

Teaching is great fun, though. Ballet, pointe - I even teach yoga, which is a nice little change and addition to the daily routine.

Janie

DanceMind: Dear Janie -- Teaching

There are approaches to teaching that can change the experience for you and the students.

What is the director doing that you can model?

Observe HER and the response of the students.

Your focus is on the children rather than on the adult. I am sure they love you, yet you are not their friend.  Being that it is temporary, you can still have a wonderful time being a teacher. It offers you a lot of experience that can sharpen your abilities as a performer.

I gotta run for now ... How is it going otherwise?

Sanna

Dear Sanna - teaching

Teaching is a lot of fun. It's really helpful to see how these little people approach ballet. I think about things in new ways and explaining it really helps me to make sense of things for myself.

Unfortunately, I have to take the good with the bad! Sometimes the little monsters can be a handful, especially the youngest group - mostly 6-year-olds. I spend half the class screaming at them to be quiet! Yet for some reason that is beyond me, they still LOVE me. I guess it's pretty much impossible to give a class of young dancers a barely professional teacher they wouldn't like, but it's still hard for me to believe they still latch on to me when I try to leave after I've spent the last hour screaming at them. Go figure. Anyway, I must admit it's a nice little boost of confidence to have my own little fan club. Rather than the usual band of critics!

The other day, I observed the youngsters in their class with the school director, however, and learned that they CAN actually do an entire combination without talking or messing up too too much. They even raised their hands when they just couldn't keep their words in anymore. I was very impressed and surprised to see this, and now that I know they are capable of behaving (sort of), I will be more strict in my demands. I'll let you know how it goes...

Janie

Dear Sanna - unreal

Ahh my summer is winding down! I mean, this is really the moment I've been waiting for, but it's still scary. I'm really glad that I am busy seeing my friends, teaching at my old studio, and getting back into shape, but it also makes getting ready to leave seem frenzied. I keep having dreams that I wake up one day and it's time to leave and I end up leaving with half my suitcases and forget to bring one pair of shoes. Not that that would actually be the end of the world, but I promise in the dream it's very stressful!

I just really want everything to go well and I want to look my best. So many times I've done things that embarrass me or that I just wish I could do over, and this is finally my chance to start fresh. I don't want to mess it up! It's my first job and I want to make a good impression so they love me as much as I want to love it there. I know it will be fine, no matter what, but I want it to be BETTER than fine. I want it to be the amazing experience it should be.

...this post brought to you by a little insomnia! But now it's really time to get up, so I should get ready for my day. Hopefully in the next few weeks posting will become part of my routine, not something to squeeze in when I should be sleeping!

Janie

DanceMind: Dear Janie -- Home

This has been a good time for you - being home.  Before you launch into your new career ('paid!')

nourishing yourself with family and friends, good home cooking, lazy afternoons and new adventures is very grounding. As you ready yourself to travel to your new destination all of these events will create this wonderful foundation for your departure. Yes it will be sad. You may cry, yet are are full of love.  Spiritually fed so to speak.

Teaching adds another dimension to your practice too. I remember when I taught psych and human development classes at a college. Although I had already taken them in my undergraduate program I learned even more ... studying, speaking, answering questions, etc.  The same is true with dance.  Guiding your students teaches/reminds you too.  You get pushed to perform to a higher standard because you are being watched.

Tell me what is happening with you Janie. As the days draw near to your departure ... talk to us about what is on your mind.

Love ya, Sanna 

Sanna Carapellotti, MS CCHT

mentalperformances.com

Dear Sanna - home sweet home

It was so nice to go back to my old studio (besides the immense pain i am experiencing after taking so much time off). They welcomed me with open arms, as always, and all the girls there are sweethearts. I even get to teach!! I had been thinking a lot about teaching as last season winded down, but I had pretty much decided there was no way they would let me, an unexperienced teacher, actually teach at a real summer intensive, especially without being able to commit to a good chunk of time. But it turned out they needed someone and I'm it! It's really fun getting to try teaching and work with the kids. I think it will also be good for my technique to see how others learn. If nothing else, it forces me to go in every morning and take class.

Janie

Dear Sanna - square one

Before I went in to get my wisdom teeth out a few weeks ago, I was expecting to be out for a few days, but it ended up knocking me out for almost two weeks! They had to scrape my jaw bone, so it was really a lot more painful a lot longer than just pulling teeth. I was upset to be off of any type of class for so long, but I did get a great opportunity to go visit some friends and family before I leave (who cares whether I ice my face at home or in the car?) which was very important to me. Who knows when or if I'll ever have another chance?

I just got back, though, so tomorrow I begin the treacherous task of getting back into shape, both dancing and my weight. Visiting grandma isn't exactly the best way to slim down. So I'll swallow my pride tomorrow and go to my old studio and try to look my best for when I leave - August 5th! My mom is coming with me and staying 10 days to help me get settled, so it shouldn't be too scary or sad.

More later! Sorry about such a long time lapse! Nothing personal - If I wasn't even dancing, you know it must have been bad. I even missed fireworks!

Janie

DanceMind: Hello to Everyone !!!

While Janie is away on vacation we can still do some neat things here ...

Let's talk about this matter of sleep.   

You might believe that if you don't sleep you just feel 'tired.' How many of you believe that?

Well, that is farther from the truth. Tiredness is one part of it. But why is your body tired? Why is you mind scattered? What do you feel just too heavy to lift a leg?

When you sleep the body is still working!!!! Muscles are being fed with blood sugar. Your hormones are rebuilding the body. Blood reduces in your very active brain so it can rest. The blood travels all around the body to heal injuries, to strengthen things you do not even know are happening.  When you DO not SLEEP, your body is not strengthened!!!

There is ONE BIG reason why you must sleep and I won't tell you that now ... Every dancer who knows is grateful to know and has noticed an improvement.

Get your sleep. If you are a teen, you need to sleep 8 - 9 hours!!! YES!   This has been studied.

Your body is still changing and you are a dancer!!! You use your body more than the average guy, or girl.

So don't take my word for it. Expereince it yourself.

Go to sleep ... Then tell me how you are dancing!

next time you will here a story about how Lisa finally went to sleep!

Sanna Carapellotti, MS CCHT

mentalperformances.com for Stepping to Sleep!

DanceMind:Dear Janie, Preparing for a Class

Well tomorrow begins a series of classes at different studios on 'Sleep." I am thrilled to be able to communicate to teens about the need for sleep, especially dancers. Dancers work the body harder than most athletes. Sleep is imperative.

This could be really cool -- WHat if whoever reads this post makes a commitment to sleep for 8 hours, at least every night for one week. I would like to know how you would feel in a week. Would you notice improvement in your performance? I have an opinion, but I will hold it!

I must go and create my plan, although I already scratched it out will watching the "Illusionist."
Great movie!

Sanna Carapellotti, MS CCHT
www.mentalperformances.com

PS -- get sleep!

DanceMind: Dear Janie -- Nervousness, Part 1

How do you handle feeling nervous before a performance?

Many performers try to get rid of it. They ignore it by 'pretending that it is not there.' Or yell at someone, or believe the rampant thoughts that run thru their mind ... Some performers even stop performing altogether because they do not want to feel the jitters at all.

Let's take a look at this experience in new way.

Feeling nervous is often misunderstood. Feeling nervous before a performance can create a flurry of thoughts that can be very controlling. You might notice that these two experiences (nervousness and performance) are linked together, happen a lot and are quite human.

We have been led to believe that being scared or feeling nervous are 'bad' feelings, to suck it up or take a pill. What if it is natural? What if you could 'BE' with it in a different way?

Try This ... isolate what the body does when you feel nervous. In other words how does the body say to you, "I am nervous, You are not going to fool me, you have a performance in an hour."

Here is what clients tell me -- "My heart races." "My knees quiver."
"I hear voices in my head." "I breathe faster." "My stomach is in knots." "I feel jumpy."

Can you honestly say that if you felt those sensations AWAY from a performance (say at another time, such as getting ready for the prom, or going on a vacation) You would ID your experience as "BAD" nervousness?

Let's look at the links and connections -- You have a performance. The idea that you have a performance triggers these sensations in the body.

The body associates these sensations with thoughts and emotions that you relate to performing -- that may not be at all accurate. You simply have established a pattern associated to performance that you believe HAS TO BE negative and scary.

As you approach performance, the body revs up. It has to make changes to perform. Can you perform relaxed in a couch position? Muscles limp. Posture slumped. Probably not.

As you approach performance, the body responds accordingly. Now it is a little different for everyone.

Some folks may be in a more quiet place and then while in the wings be able to jump to a higher energy level to get pumped.
Others may feel sensations all over the body like an electrical feeling. they get juiced and charged up.

You see it is natural for the body to 'get ready."

How does your body do that?


Back by Monday!

Sanna Carapellotti, MS CCHT
MentalPerformances.com

Embrace your fears.

DanceMind: Dear Janie -- Touching Base!

Janie,

Isn't it so nourishing to be home!  What a nice link for you to touch in  with family and friends and then head to your paid dance position overseas!  Time will fly by. Take a few moments to spend the time ... You know how involved a dancers life can be ... so many long hours.  This is good 'soul food' for you to be able to spend this time with your family. I am sure they are thrilled and very proud of you as we all are here on this blog.

With most dancers away for summer intensive, it has been a little more quiet than usual.  I receive so many wonderful notes from dancers with questions or comments about you. It is very special. Thank you all... We love that you are here reading this blog.  Janie, what is amazing is that many of the comments indicate that they have grown with you. Cried with you and cheered you on to your next position.

Caitlyn, TX said this, "I hope Janie writes to us. I would miss her. I am being selfish because I am also learning  a lot here. Please always be Janie."

Jeri, CA wrote, "I was so worried about Janie. I actually cried one night when she was making the decision to leave or not."

This is so cool. I could not ask for more. This was my intention in designing this blog - A place for dancers to talk thru 'things.'  Dance is not just about dance. 

Sanna Carapellotti, MS

www.mentalperformances.com

PS.  Attention : Sleepless Dancers! I got something for you ... Check it out!

Dear Sanna - home life

I cannot believe I have already been home for two weeks. I am soaking up the laziness. I almost feel guilty, not taking full advantage of every moment home, but I am just too content sleeping until almost noon, spending quality time with my puppy (who is 9 but will always be my puppy), and hanging out with my parents! I am so lame. But I like it.

I still take class about 4 times a week and go see my friends, there's just a lot of time at home. I actually gave myself a class at home the other day, because I couldn't make it to the studio. I decided to practice teaching, too, because lately I've been thinking more and more about how I really would like to teach some day. So like a big idiot, I showed and said the combination, did it right and left with the music, and corrected myself. Haha hopefully nobody was walking by to peak in the curtains, because I'm sure I looked like a crazy person talking to myself while dancing in my dining room.

I actually met my old ballet teacher yesterday to catch up. She is the one who encouraged me to go away two years ago, and I really feel like I owe a lot to her for getting me where I needed to be to take the next step in my training. It was so nice, we chatted for almost two hours before we both needed to go, and she gave me some great insight and advice. I think I'll share the two biggest pieces of advice she gave for all of you out there:

1) Keep up with college. Even just one class every 6 months, just to stay on top of it. She suggests UC Berkeley online, because it's relatively inexpensive, you can do it from anywhere because it's all online, and you have 6 months to complete the course, with no deadlines in between. I like that you can manage your own time. The website is http://www.unex.berkeley.edu/

2) If at all possible, start a retirement fund. Ask your company if they have any sort of program where they will match the amount you place in your retirement fund, because this is all non-taxable money that will grow and be incredibly helpful in the future. My dad will be happy to hear about this one

Janie

DanceMind: Dear Janie -- Relax!

Janie, Janie, Janie,

This is the time for R & R. Most 'company' members take a breather during the summer months to allow the body to regenerate, rest and rebuild.  :)

Give yourself permission to spend time with family and friends, go have some good fun! If you are concerned about staying in shape there are many ways to do that. Consider working your body in a new way ... Hot yoga, Ashtanga yoga, or pilates, take a different kind of ballet class. Visit different studios. 

It is difficult to let go of a routine as rigorous as ballet. It has been described as being "sprung!"

Boing!   Believe you will be working soon enough. So give it a try to continue training, yet offering some variety.

The other issue may be flexibility. Family and friends may not understand your need to train. 

You might be able to have a list of possibilities so when you Mom says, "let's go shopping!"  you can plan to to take an early morning class, or a later class.

You have been working very hard in the last weeks.  Yes, this may seem like the easy part. Being in the 'middle' of change is where you are.  STAY IN THE MOMENT.  It is like Tarzan swinging from tree to tree. He knows where he is headed and enjoys the flight!  :)

IT IS SUMMERTIME -- Get outdoors. Go on a picnic. Leisurely sit at a coffee shop and read. 

Begin a craft or hobby.  

You'll be packing again soon enough! 

YOU DID IT!!!!

Sanna Carapellotti, MS CCHT

Sanna is a Performance Specialist with a focus on performers.  Her clients are dancers, musicians, photographers, etc who want to perform better.  She is an expert de-stresser for performance, audition, surgery, and healing.  Contact her at 412.344.2272

Dear Sanna - I thought this was supposed to be the easy part!

I am desperately trying to stay in shape. Of course it is nice to see my friends and family, and I am having fun, but I cannot believe how busy I am! I am still waiting to be bored, as everyone warned me a summer off would be, and I expected. But this has been the fastest week of my life! There is always something to do or be done.

Even when I do make it to ballet class (which is about 4 times a week, so I can't really complain) I am not used to the small studios or slippery floors, plus I am sore from not dancing enough and the plane, etc. What I tough life I lead on vacation!

Haha I am only kidding - it's fine, just not quite as relaxing as I expected. But as my grandma always said, I can sleep when I'm dead, right?

More soon,

Janie

DanceMind: Dear Janie -- We miss you!

Janie, I know you are visiting with family, resting and taking class. This is a good time for you to take a break and recharge yourself.

When I return here later I will discuss a few tings that can be helpful to those of you going off to summer intensive.

Sanna Carapellotti, MS CCHT

Performance Specialist

DanceMind:Dear Janie, You have Landed

You have closed a chapter.

Sanna Carapellotti, MS CCHT

Performance Specialist

Dear Sanna - MOVING IS HARD

As I mentioned earlier, the full impact of the changes haven't really sunk in yet, so it is very exciting as each aspect becomes more and more real to me. And now, a story:

So I'm in the airport, pushing the limits as usual. Each of the two suitcases I checked (even though I had to pay extra for the second. grrr) is on a scale, and I'm transferring items from one to the other until each weighs exactly 50.5, the maximum before you're charged for overweight baggage. How I managed to pack exactly 101 pounds worth of things is a miracle I happily accept without question. For now we'll ignore the ridiculous weight of what I've already shipped home. But really the whole point of this story is that the incredibly patient and nice woman checking me in (it helped that I was about 3 hours early for once in my life and there was nobody else in the airport) was helping me transfer and shove things. She noticed my pointe shoes and asked if I was a professional, and I had an epiphany! I have a job next year... meaning I will be paid to dance... meaning... I AM A PROFESSIONAL BALLERINA! wohoooo! It's funny that I had to see it through a stranger's point of view to realize how cool that is! I just had to share.

But enough of Janie bragging and telling long, dramatic stories all for stating the obvious... can I just say moving is really HARD. Even though I'm really kind of callous to the emotional difficulties of moving right now, it is just hard work! My arms were shaking today from all the heavy lifting. I'm hoping I take away from this experience not only the fact that I am a pack rat, which I already knew, but maybe the first steps in changing that about myself. I have given away more in the past month than I think I have given away in all my life combined. And there's still so much! I've been trying this technique lately and it helps a little. I ask myself if somebody else would think I was sick for keeping something, and if the answer is yes, then it goes. Such as, a vogue dated holiday 2006. Granted, it was really thick and I continuously found cool stuff in it up to this day, but the idea of saving that without any specific thing that made it special sounded sick, so I tossed it. It's a start at least...

Janie

DanceMind: To All - IMPORTANT Free gift!

I want to thank all of you who have emailed me personally and have responded with comments.

Your support have indicated that this service has value and does help not only Janie, but you as our reader as well. That was my plan - to help as many people as I can.  DRAWING BELOW!

As Janie moves, travels and finds her new place in the world of dance and the world. Stay with us because we can help her and you can help yourself as well.

Please tell your friends about DanceMind.  We want to get the word out that Dancers can strengthen through developing mind power - on purpose!

DRAWING --  I am going to draw a name for a FREE Stepping to Sleep CD. All you have to do is email me and say "Put my name in!"  We will be drawing on June 20th. SO if you have are tossing and turning, this is your chance to put it to rest. You will sleep! This is the program that Dance magazine recommended in the June 2008 article, The Science of Sleep

DO it now so you will be included -  Send Name and email -- Sanna@mentalperformances.com

Just for signing up you will receive a free download for summer travel safety and be invited to attend a summer tele-seminar -- Enjoy The Jitters! lead by me!

'

Sanna Carapellotti, MS CCHT

Performance Specialist

DanceMind: Dear Janie -- Changes r real now ....

Janie,

This is a growing time for you. Stay with the experience. Thru time you carry all that you have learned with you. It has become who you are.

You have shown that you care in many ways. How can you say you are heartless? You are courageous, strong and incredibly sensitive. Many many different emotions run thru us during times of major change. It is best to ride the waves. Let yourself move thru them.  Just be with them. It feels painful, it feels surreal, it feels impatient, it feels sad -- but it is real and honest. You will be missed and you will miss your city, friends, dance, teachers, apartment, the weather, you fav lunch place.

Grab a notebook and jot down what you have loved, things you will not forget about your studio and teachers. I am certain that each teacher has given you many 'gifts' that you will always carry with you as you dance and thru life.  You have more than you know at this very minute.

As you step away, be proud of who you have become.

Love ya kiddo,

Sanna Carapellotti, MS

Performance Specialist

PS -- Stepping to Sleep - Yes! You can sleep better!

Dear Sanna - Ch ch ch ch changes!

I have to tell you that I had to listen to David Bowie when I saw your last post. I am such a dork.

I sold my car! What a relief! I won't even go into that drama...

I am also selling a few other large, unnecessary possessions, such as my bed, but I must say the hardest thing I've parted with so far was about 4 shopping bags full of clothing. I brought them to ballet, though, and the girls were thrilled beyond belief, so it was a little easier than just dumping the things at goodwill. I also saw many of my discarded pieces modeled this week, which made me feel better, since I'm sure most of that would end up sitting in my closet at my parents' house.

It's been hard to say goodbye to people and things, like realizing it was the very last time I would be driving my car, taking class at the studio, seeing my friends, but I think it hasn't really quite hit me yet.

It's funny because I think I used up all my tears when I was little. I used to be such a sap! Every year I would bawl at spring show when I thought about all my friends who were graduating and leaving me behind, but I can't cry over it anymore! I know crying won't help matters, but I feel heartless when I feel absolutely no need to cry over goodbyes. I'll miss everyone, but I'm excited for the future, so I guess it's good I'm not sad about it, but I do feel silly when the tears do finally come when I've had a stressful day and the lady at the post office won't let me mail my package (true story I'm sad to say).

Anyway 3 days left here!!! I plan on making them a good 3 days, too, despite the crappy weather ;)

Janie

DanceMind: Dear Janie -- Changes

Hello there Janie,

I had to step away to prepare for several presentations on Sleep!   How did something so necessary and natural become a stress!  We have to, and can't ...  There are many aspects of sleep that are unknown and somethings we do know.  I continually read and study. Mainly because I noticed some years ago that when my clients are feeling better, they sleep and when they sleep better they feel better. Enough rambling...

You  must be busy packing up!  You talked about selling your car. Did you have any luck and do you have a plan B in it does not sell?

I can only imagine the 'good-byes.' There is a camaraderie among dancers that is strong in the end.  Sometimes silent there is a deep connection of understanding.  One client referred to it as a 'club you do not officially belong to, you just step into the studio and you are a member.'

As you spring board off into the professional world, I am looking forward to hearing  of your experiences.  Keep us posted with all that you are doing, even your travel, the stuff in between here and there, or there and there. 

Bless you!, Janie. This is the adventure of a life time.

Sanna Carapellotti, MS CCHT

Performance Specialist

PS - If you are going to Summer Intensive (Duh!),  there is lots to get ready for after school/graduation parties.  How exciting it is to meet new friends, teachers and dance in different studios! You 'll be in a new city, involved in social events.  I always enjoyed hearing my daughters adventures. Always good clean fun and lots of laughs.

We have a few offerings for you so you can sleep better while you are away. 

Stepping to Sleep is now ON SALE.  Whether you sleep well or not, this programs actually helps you to improve the quality of your sleep. You will feel so good in the morning!

Dance Magazine recommended the program too! That is really cool. You know you are receiving a high quality product that works!  

Read what David says -  "It was so easy to fall asleep! I did not have to do anything. You just lie back and Sanna says all this cool dancer imagery and you drift off to sleep. I was very rested in the morning."

Click here to read all about, and to buy Stepping To Sleep

It is on Sale now for you to take to summer intensive AND there are FREE gifts you will love!

Dance Magazine recommends --

Stepping to Sleep in this month's issue!  June 2008!

I am so honored. We can get the word out that sleeping is important!. You have to sleep in order to perform your best.  I have placed the program is on Sale and I have created a Performance Package that is very exciting with 5 free offerings!

Go to my site and read about these exciting programs.  Performance Package, (with free gifts and an opportunity). The Audition CD, and Stepping to Sleep.

Janie, I will talk with you tonight. I have a meeting now --- This very exciting for you. I have had several questions if you are going to blog! I appreciate you responding to that~ and mostly that you will continue to blog through this experience.

Sincerely,

Sanna Carapellotti, MS

Dear Sanna - I don't want to quit!

I love this blog and I think it is more important than ever to continue blogging through this experience! I have no idea what my situation will be like while/once I move, but if I don't have consistent internet access, I will be upset way beyond this blog. The internet is my best way to keep in touch with everyone, so I will make it a priority. In other words, it will take a LOT to stop me from blogging.

Last night a few of the girls and their wonderful parents organized what I like to call a "prom without the prom" for all of us. It was so much fun to get together for one last event! After class we all dressed up and got ready at the studio and got picked up by a limo to bring us to dinner. It was lovely, but also the first time I felt a real pang of sadness about leaving. Up until this point, it was too easy to focus on the unhappy memories I will be leaving behind here, but last night I realized I am really going to miss my friends. Dancers have such a special bond, sharing the studio for so many hours every day. Even a whole day apart seems like a lot, so I will definitely miss them.

At the same time, though, each day I am getting more and more excited as I am starting to fully accept that I am really doing this! Not only am I moving half way across the world, but I am actually starting a job with a professional ballet company! It makes me almost tear up to even type that. I always feared that it would never happen for me, no matter how modest the company.

:) Janie

Dear Sanna - I'm going!

Today I got the final written word I needed - I will be able to obtain a work visa, probably the day I apply for it, so I am officially moving overseas!

Today I sold one of my most prized possessions, my kitchen aid mixer, on craig's list :( It is definitely replaceable, and silly to keep when my mom has one, I can't use it in a different country, and it's very expensive to ship, but I am still sad to see my birthday present from last year packed up in a box and sold to a stranger. Oh well, it's another thing to cross off my list, and as I said, silly to keep. Last night I baked a final, humongous batch of cookies to say goodbye, so now I have a freezer full of more cookies than I could possibly eat before I leave, in less than two weeks!!

Now I just need to sell my car, finish shipping the boxes I've packed (and finish packing the boxes and luggage I haven't started to pack) and give away all the things I no longer want/need/have room for.

Just small things really. My biggest stress is the car, but we will see...

Janie

Dance Mind:Dear Janie, Are You Going?

Janie,  Are you going overseas?  Is that a definite?

Sanna Carapellotti, MS CCHT

Performance Specialist

DanceMind: Dear Janie -- Changes

There is a lot to moving.  The packing, the closure, the anticipation, the unknown.... saying goodbye -- and Hello!

As for all you stuff to do ---

Think about how you function the best. This is when those skills come in very handy and are very necessary. 

Are you are list maker?  You may need to have several different lists for each day, the different areas of your life, who you need to say good bye to, get letters of recommendation from (DO THAT BEFORE YOU LKEAVE)... There is also the timing of the task. Somethings will have a time frame.  And are at the top of the list. 

There is nothing that feels better than a list with check marks or lines drawn through the tasks.  Maybe there is a friend there that can help you?  To run errands?

 __________________________________________________

Yes, this is a part of stepping out into the world. Learning how to manage money, long distance calls, moving,  packing, selling...  As you begin to work, you are not an official student any longer.

Pace yourself. Focus on the that task at hand rather than looking at the BIG picture. Everything you do will move you toward completion, one step at a time. Stop and pause. Keep you mind on that task before you. Chunk down.  

This has been a good experience for you in many ways.  in a few months you will have moved through this and gained so much more maturity.

THINK BACK TO WHEN YOU had moved there. Look at how much you have grown.  Observe how many things you have learned to do that are routine and necessary that you did not know living at home. Sometimes it is the simplest littlest things you do not realize have a process.

I know you are smart. You will get the info you need. 

2 weeks -- is 14 x 24 + 336 hours. You can get the job done.  

How can I help you?

Sanna Carapellotti, MS CCHT

Performance Specialist

Dear Sanna - confidence

Yes! I do sound more confident, and I feel at least that I know what I want. I must admit though, as much as I know what I want, I am still indecisive, since I am relying on information that others refuse to give me!!! Very frustrating. Extremely frustrating. I have sent more emails than humanly possible, but I suppose in the very near future I will have to obtain a calling card and figure out how to call another country at the appropriate time of day with out spending $100. Blah. Oh well I'll figure it out.

I am also concerned with selling or shipping all my belongings. I only have two more weeks!! I am very excited and very stressed. And also trying to enjoy my numbered days :)

Janie

DanceMind: Dear Janie -- Movin' On

Your last post has a certain confidence to it. Read it again.  Do you feel that?

This has been quite a year for you Janie.  I am happy that this blog has been so helpful to you.  You have helped me a lot to.  Some time ago I kept hearing You have to blog ... You have to blog ... I read a few and quite honestly I was not interested in detailing my day.  One day it occurred to me to establish a blog in this way ...  You are anonymous so you can speak your mind without the repercussion  many fear, and discover ways to manage emotions, handle conflict, speak up and when to stay quiet. 

We are all I such awe at the poise and beauty of ballet dancers. I, as a dance enthusiast, am spellbound. Yet Audiences and even respective peers do not know what can go on in the mind and heart of a dancer.  You work so hard, standing on that pointe. So much is expected, so much is endured. Too much remains silent and unspoken.

I spent some time rereading. You have grown so much since Sept. when we began our first exchanges.  You have been very open and honest and reflective.  There are moments when we really must pause and contemplate "what next?"  You have done that.  

I also know that you have helped many young dancers.  "M" wrote, "Janie is awesome. I wish she danced at my studio. But she might, 'cause I do not know who she is! Can you tell just me please?"

That was the cutest!

We'll talk more. When you have time tell us your tentative plans.

Sanna Carapellotti, MS, CCHT

Performance Specialist

Dear Sanna - Thanks!

Thanks (Sanna and everyone who commented or voted) for all your support. Not only is this a great place for me to organize my thoughts, but your feedback and encouragement really helps.

At this point, I really can't think of anything that would stop me from going. I have gotten most of my questions answered to my satisfaction, although I am still waiting to see a few more things in writing just to be sure.

I really am working on being less tentative when it comes to getting information from the bosses. You're completely right - we are so intimidating of asking questions we absolutely have the right to ask! I have been taking baby steps, forcing myself to email and ask every question I believe is important, no matter how annoying I think I sound. For all I know, they could think I'm a flake for not asking important questions! Or for agreeing too readily, maybe they will underestimate my talent.

...so I guess my answer is still pending, but I'm working on it every day, and right now I am going unless something overwhelmingly happens to influence me to change my mind.

Janie

Dear Janie, So - You are Going?

You sound very certain of your decision. You want to step out and realize that this is the time to do it. You are ready. You want to travel and work professionally. You want a paycheck. You are willing to relocate half way around the world from your current location here in the USA.

You are amazing. This is such a giant leap.

Do you have all the answers to your questions of some time ago? Citizenship? Commitment? Safety? Money? Family responses? Have yu talked with them to confirm? Have they sent you any papers/contracts?

This could happen very very soon?

Talk to us when you have a chance --NOW JANIE!!!!!

Sanna Carapellotti, MS CCHT
Creator of Mental Performances CD's for Dancers

• The Audition CD, Mental training
• Stepping To Sleep, deep restorative sleep for dancers
  

DanceMind: Dear Janie -- No Problem.

Hello Janie,

Yes, I understand. There is so much to do these days. The computer keeps us involved in many, many ways with all the social networks, email, fun browsing and all, and then there is life and BALLET!

Well, You have been offered an 'unpaid' apprenticeship. Paid or unpaid, it is certainly quite an accomplishment. CONGRATULATIONS! You have been recognized for your efforts and hard work. They acknowledge your current skill level as being efficient for advancement. You must pause for a moment and realize that. It seems to me like you may be brushing it off because of the pay issue. Few advance to the level of apprentice. You have to appreciate all that you have done to be offered this placement.

Trust me, you are not the only one who refers to it as 'slave labor.' And you are right, you could be searching for an appointment in the next year or two as the apprenticeship does not guarantee a company contract. It takes you to the threshold, standing at the edge of professionalism (without a payck).

The paycheck is one big deal for many dancers in your position. It is as if they arrive to a point where they are mentally tired, feel taken advantage of, and reimbursement motivates and acknowledges them as professionals. The intrinsic reward of dance does not pay the bills.

If others have any comments on this topic, please comment.

Here is one story -- (client allowed me to inform without name disclosure). Trainee Dancer with a large company was told in January that he 'would' very seriously be considered for an apprenticeship. He did not audition figuring he was secure. They did not offer him anything at all and he was not even told that the position was not available to him. Here it is May and he has no position, except perhaps another year as a 'trainee.'

UNTIL you have the papers in hand, you may not have anything except possibility. My opinion is that you have to do what you have to do to advance your training and movement toward a professional appointment. Some have an illusion of loyalty and sense of false hope. Feedback and conversation must often be initiated by the dancer to have questions answered or when a possible position will be filled.

I often hear that one can be afraid to approach a teacher in charge of hiring for fear of being pushy, a nuisance or bold. Is this because of the silence of dance performance? The body communicates, is expressive. Does voice step you out of line? Ask yourself about the scenario above. What would you have done?

Sanna Carapellotti, MS CCHT
Performance Specialist

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Consider Stepping To Sleep, your guided imagery program designed for a good night! You will not believe the difference in the morning. Read more here

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Dear Sanna - Oops!

Ah now I remember! After my meeting, I was trying to post something, when my computer shut down on me. I usually leave a window up with the blog, as a reminder and a quick way to post my thoughts, but when I restarted I guess I just forgot and here we are a week later! Perhaps it is good though, because now I have collected my thoughts.

So my meeting went as well as I could have hoped. They offered me the position I had been hoping for all year (still unpaid of course), but really all that I could have expected. Yet I wasn't that excited about it. Don't get me wrong - of course I was pleased, and relieved, to be honest, that all my hard work had not gone unnoticed.

But as much as I am grateful to have options, it seems like a back-up plan to me now. My other offer seems so much more exciting. I think I want to take this big step, rather than spend another year here, feeling inadequate, probably dancing some decent roles, but likely to be kicked to the curb next year, or allowed to stay another year as a slave. No thank you. It would not be the worst thing in the world by any means, but I think I made up my mind that I want to travel, and get paid, and be appreciated, and dance A LOT (I'm told). Of course, I must remember that all the hairy details are really not hammered out yet, but it seems like I am leaving the country!

More later! Sorry I've been away so long. Posts will be frequent for a few weeks, until I restart my computer and forget again... but I'll try not to!

Janie

DanceMind: Dear Janie -- We miss you!

I have not heard from you!  Let us know what is happening.   I am getting provate emails fro those who are concerned and wondering about you!

You know, Janie, this is where one really 'lives.'   In the throws of change and uncertainty.

Sanna Carapellotti, MS CCHT

mentalperformances.com

DanceMind: Dear Janie -- Friday Meeting

How was your meeting?  I would love to hear!!!

Be patient, Janie. These are some exciting times for you.  To clear out your mind a bit, do some writing in a journal, or use some of those fabulous techniques on the Mental Performances CD's

You could use some restorative sleep.  Lay  down  and go to sleep.

You have mentioned your concern about the 'army' a couple of times. Have you gone to the Embassy, or looked at the requirements. I am sure it is very clear 'somewhere' about army status of citizens.  That would be a serious consideration. You mentioned that you know someone there. Can you e-mail them, or ask the ballet. I think I would  want to know from a very reliable source, such as a government agency,

Giving yourself time to orient yourself, learn everyday life (money, location, shopping, etc.). (different for everyone).

How interesting it would be to compare a foreign company with what you know of American companies and training.

Sanna Carapellotti, MS

mentalperformances.com

Dear Sanna - Everything happens for a reason

I have a meeting scheduled for Friday. Did I tell you I missed it while auditioning last week? All those in between the school and company had meetings, either confirming previous offers or getting new ones (or not), so this could be interesting. As I come across more snags in my international plans, it would be nice to have an offer here, just in case it doesn't work out.

I am constantly researching and bugging people to try to nail down some facts about what will be expected of me in order to become a citizen, etc. Many urge that I visit before I go, too, however this is such an expensive trip, not to mention I don't have much time to organize my life before I need to go in August. I would much rather just go in August and give it a year, so I can really experience it before I decide I hate it (I'm sure I won't, but that's what the skeptics say at least). I kind of just wanna go for it and see what happens, as long as they don't end up locking me in the country or sending me off to the army or something.

Everything happens for a reason, but it is very stressful trying to plan for whatever does happen.

Janie

DanceMind: Dear Janie -- Audition Every Day

Janie,

You got it, Baby!  A healthy balance between dancing for you and also for others. Of course those watching whether it is an audience or teachers or others keep you on your toes.

"Bring nervous' is completely misunderstood.  You have to separate out fear/worry from the excitement of performing. The body has a similar 'feel' in both states -- heart rate faster, tingling in the hands and feet ...  That same feeling is felt in other situations that are truly stressful and then gets confused when experienced for performance. One automatically assumes that it is 'bad.'

How could you dance relaxed? You want to be juiced, excitement ...  Ah-ha, some performers like to be more low key as they move toward a performance. The key is to know who you are, what you have to do and how much energy do you need to perform.

That is a very advanced way of perceiving yourself as a dancer. Good job!

Sanna Carapellotti, MS CCHT

Performance Specialist

Dear Sanna - every day is an audition

I think this lack of audition anxiety is the result of having "important" people watching me every day. Going to a new place, I had to prove myself. No matter who was teaching, I always had to dance my best, and there was always someone watching in the doorway. It's not that I am not dancing for myself anymore, because I think I am more than ever, but I suppose the people watching are a little reminder of how I want to better myself. I want to get a job of course, but it makes me happy to be a good dancer.

Every day is an audition, so I am much more used to people watching me and scrutinizing my work. I get nervous within the class, of course, with a combination I am unsure about or display my weaknesses. But I think a small amount of nerves is a healthy way to keep working my hardest.

Janie

DanceMind: Dear Janie -- Audition Presence

When you hop back on  Janie. Talk to me about your presence and little to no anxiety at audition.  There is so much to say about that very issue. You have moved from having difficulty to being very comfortable with who you are as a dancer.

Sanna Carapellotti, MS

DanceMind: Dear Janie -- Life and Decisions

Well this news certainly adds flame to the fire ...

I am happy to hear that you spent some time with your grandparents. Being a highly disciplined dancer and possessing a strong work ethic, it can be difficult to get away for a visit with family. I am sure they appreciated seeing you. Touching in with your family is very nourishing.

A prestigious school - hmm-mm.  

Why do you think this company hired you? Did they speak to you about that?  I understand that you are talented and  adorable, pretty and smart... however, I can imagine they do receive applications from "all over  the world."   Believe me I am not questioning your ability, or professional readiness or anything like that.  What do you know now about 'foreign ballet companies and company jobs?' This one company in particular?

What did they say to you?   Maybe I missed this in a previous discussion.

What would help you to make this decision? What is your time frame to make this decision?

The question is "Should Janie go overseas to work with this foreign ballet company?"

Sanna Carapellotti, MS

Performance Specialist

Dear Sanna - life goes on

Before all this business came about with the foreign job offer, I set up an audition for a school as a sort of back-up plan. It's a prestigious school and all, but nonetheless a school and therefore a lateral move at best. I would have to pay tuition here, which I don't do now. Perhaps this would improve my resume, though, so it's hard to determine whether this would be a step down.

Anyway as much as I wanted to audition, this was also somewhat of an excuse to visit my grandparents, whom I haven't seen in a while. It was a very nice (although short) visit. They took me to the audition, and I continued my recent pattern of not being nervous at all. I actually was so relaxed, I even felt myself criticizing the class, and rolling my eyes a few times before I caught myself and remembered I was trying to impress them, not vice-versa. It seemed like a class one has to get used to, so I'm sure it is a good program. I just struggled a little, feeling like I was seeing a tv show for the first time half way through the season.

At any rate, I was accepted into the highest level, which should be expected since this is a school and I like to think I am closer to the professional level, but it is still a nice little confidence boost to get in.

Janie

DanceMind: Dear Janie -- CON, Pointe 2

Janie writes -- Con, Pointe #2 ...

I know very little about the company, which does not necessarily mean it will be bad. But there is a chance that  might not like it or worse, get out of shape or injured while I am there.

Response -- Time has passed and I am sure you have researched and talked with people. Now you know more.   You would KNOW very little about any company UNTIL YOU HAVE BEEN THERE FOR A WHILE.  That would be very true for any experience, ballet, work, vacation or otherwise. Until you are immersed for a period of time you do not really know about them. What you read in the brochure is a marketing pitch and is not always true to how they operate day to day.

It is not about being dishonest, it is business to put our best foot forward even if it is embellished or glossed over. This of course can happen here in America.  I speak with lots of performers who struggle within the dynamics of their companies.  You always have a choice in the event that this occurs --- 1. Leave.  2. Change your response.  3. Ignore.  4. Change the situation.

Knowing you -- You can keep in shape.  Moot point.

You can get injured anywhere on the planet. You will handle it in the best way if injury occurs.I am sure they have professionals on hand because dancers get injured.  Moot point.

Good thinking. You have done a real good job of thinking this through.

Sanna Carapellotti, MS CCHT

Performance Specialist

Dear Sanna - In Response to Your Questions...

I am comfortable with (the idea of) living alone in a foreign country. I have never done it, so I can't be sure, but the idea of moving out of the U.S. does not phase me. I really see it as an opportunity to study abroad, which many of my friends and family have already done, so it does not really scare me.

There are concerns in this area that it might not be the safest place, but then again there's always going to be a risk, no matter where I go, and I won't let that dictate my life. There's possibility of another terrorist attack (heaven forbid) in New York City, but I would never think twice about that if I was planning on moving there. I could be scared of living in the south because of hurricanes. To me, there may be fears, but unless there are absolute reasons that would make me weary of even visiting a place, I don't like to let such things prevent me from living my life.

I do not know someone directly in the area, but I have many good friends and family who have already told me about people they know there. An Uncle already told his friends in high positions there that I may be coming, and they promised to take care of me.

I'm not sure I would really call this a risk, but if it is, I took a similar risk by moving where I am now, and I have no regrets.

When I think about myself years from now looking back on this experience, I can't imagine regretting making the move. Rather, it seems like an opportunity one might regret if they missed out on. I am not really missing out on any other opportunities by staying here, because I don't really have any other opportunities. None of the offers I received this year made me feel this way. It was all kind of expected, or disappointing after learning the details.

I can't really predict what I would say to myself in the future, because I don't know how my life will play out. Everything happens for a reason, I think, and I'm sure either way I will have a pretty good life. I'm sure if I go I will learn a lot, no matter what happens. If I decide I hate it and want to move back, then I'll have that experience and that new knowledge. Of course if I like it, I'll stay for I don't know how long. If I don't go, I'll always wonder what could've happened, although maybe sticking it out here another year would result in a job. Or maybe taking a modest position somewhere else, it will turn out to be the right place for me, but why not choose the place offering me a job, with a real adventure?

I can afford to travel home in the case of a family crisis or if I just decide I want to go home. The only thing about living in this place that will be more expensive than my current situation is travel. Everything else (as far as I know) should be about the same, or probably even a little cheaper. I won't have a car there, so no gas money, and I'll probably be within walking distance from the studios, so no public transportation money either. Housing even seems a little less expensive. In addition, I will have a monthly salary, so my parents should be putting out less money that they would if I stayed here, and if I need to come home, they could definitely afford it, or if they continued to give me the same financial assistance as this year, I could use my savings for a plane ticket.

Janie

DanceMind: Dear Janie -- CON, Pointe 1

Janie Writes - It's very far away. This means even more expensive air fare and longer flights. (so less visits home) But not necessarily less people visiting me, because I think this place might have more appeal than my current location.  PLUS I'll be getting paid, so the airfare is more feasible.

Yes, the distance can be a deciding factor. It is far, very far. Less trips home and less visits from family and friends.  People are certainly more mobile these days and what used to be 'half way around' the world now is perceptively much closer.  

Yes, your pay will have to assist with travel costs etc. Unless someone is supporting you, such as parents or others. 

Distance can be a factor if you want to be closer to home, or have home be accessible.

Is your personality one that is easily adaptable to changes?

Sanna Carapellotti MS, CCHT

Performance Specialist

DanceMind: Dear Janie -- PRO, Pointe 6

Pro Point 6 --  Janie Writes --My parents are actually supportive. Of course they do not want me to be so far away, but I was surprised to hear how ready they were to agree to this.

This is a definite plus that your parents support you.  They are saying that they trust you, that you are capable, and that they are in agreement that it could be a good experience for you. They may also be agreeing that some financial support is possible. (Have you discussed the 'business' end of it with them?)

You must have earned their trust and secured their commitment to your goals by your hard work, your life style, how you behave and your attitudes towards them and your desire to pursue ballet. This is to be applauded. We all know that the path in the ballet world is not 

a traditional straight and narrow one. 

You would want to ask -- the "What if's ..."  Can you afford to travel back and forth in the event of a family crisis? Or if you decide that you are too unhappy, or the situation was not safe, or you are injured ???

Because of the distance, I think you need to consider  a broader picture to know that safety and health issues are discussed and reasonably planned out.  It is not like living in the next city where your parents can drive over in you are ill or injured. I do not believe that this is being negative. If you have a plan in place then you, and they, will feel more secure and safer.

I am sure the company has ideas too. Ask them any questions of this nature.

Kudos to you and your relationship with your parents!!! Keep talking with them as you discover more information. Being older and wiser they will have a different slant and perspective to help sort through what you are learning.

Again, Keep learning and discovering!!!  I am so proud of you and your approach to this ---

Sanna Carapellotti, MS CCHT

Performance Coach and Specialist

DanceMind: Dear Janie -- Question

Janie, Let's say you have advanced in age and are now 45. You may be married, have a few children, working, have your education, you maybe involved with ballet in some way.

Can you look back and see/feel this experience as being a part of your life?

What  would you say  to younger Janie if you were helping her make this decision (and she had WENT)

What would you say to to younger Janie if you HAD NOT WENT for some reason?

Sanna Carapellotti, MS CCHT

Performance Specialist and Coach

mentalperformances.com

DanceMind: Dear Janie -- PRO, Pointe 5

I have nothing to lose. I really have no strings here right now. I don't have a job. I rent an apartment. Im attending community college which I intended to transfer anyway. I was prepared to move this year anyway, even if I hadn't thought it would be out of the country. Janie, pro point #5 in  considering her move VERY far away to dance ballet (paid position) with a professional company.

Having this freedom is a definite plus and very well conceived. You are free to move in all aspects of your current life. You can leave when your contract is finished this year. School, housing, work, training and no relationships are holding you in your current state. 

Yes, you had planned to move anyway, unless of course you were offered a position of apprenticeship or company.

So the only thing that could keep you  from moving is you. Are you willing to take the risk?

Well, let's think about  this -- whether you move here or there .... adjustments in home, environment, relationships, training/dance opportunities will be apart of the move regardless as to where you live. New friends, change of scenery/weather, different studio, new teachers,

the need to make new friends, discover new experiences to live life differently in a foreign country.

Most students are forever impacted after living in a different land. The culture stimulates interests and new awarenesses.

Are you comfortable living alone on a forgien country? Is this country a safe place? Are there any concerns in that area?  Do you know someone in the area? Are you a risk taker? 

You have the  freedom to go according to Point #5.

Sanna Carapellotti, MS CCHT

DanceMind: Dear Janie -- PRO, Pointe 4

Good weather is always a plus.  

WOuld that deter you from accepting a job if it were really hot or very cold at this point?  It is something to consider sometimes. 

Sanna Carapellotti. MS CCHT

DanceMind: Dear Janie --With Information

Janie,  With information you can accept this offer.

     With information you may not want this offer.

Take good notes as you re learning more each day ...

Sanna Carapellotti, MS CCHT

www.mentalperformances.com

Dear Sanna - awww man! (but it's okay!)

I got an email last night from the director's assistant that explains that they were hoping I could come learn some ballets before they go on tour at the end of May so I could go along, but of course I have to finish out my "contract" here so I can't go :( Boo that would have been so cool!

He also told me the next season begins in August, so that sounds a little comfier, to everyone. The contracts last one year and continue from year to year if I "stay working in the company." Does that mean I can get fired? If so, that's okay because I would almost rather see a company with a strong work ethic and integrity than have a cozy job for the rest of my life with a company I've never seen that could possibly be very lazy.

They provide health care (yay) and pointe shoes, although we will need to further investigate this, as I am told they may not be able to get the kind I like. (Could I provide my own and be reimbursed?)

Okay ready for the bad news? The salary I calculated must have been a monthly salary, because I am told I will start out with $1000 a month, not a week. Ha. I knew it was too good to be true. Oh well, as many have said, it's more than I am making now or could hope to make next year anywhere else! Honestly, I am relieved this is the bad news at this point. Clearly I am not in this profession for the money, although it would be nice. I'm hoping this amount will pay the bills, but really, this is an amazing opportunity and as I said I would be making less if I stayed here anyway. So that's that.

Anyway they seem very nice, and I really can't see why I wouldn't accept this offer, as long as the whole citizenship thing goes smoothly - of course I will be looking into that further this week.

Janie

DanceMind: Dear Janie -- Pros - Point 2

POINT TWO - Good Pay. The director's assistant did not give me any details yet, so I googled the companies salaries and found an article that described them in the country's currency. I used online currency converters and unless I messed up or the source is unreliable, the company makes between 800.00 and 1100.00 a week.  That's about what the first year corps at NYCB makes, so I couldn't hope for a higher salary even if I was offered a job here. If I do stay, the best I'll get is a small stipend, no where near enough to pay my bills, or perhaps tuition.

COMMENT --    Yes, that does sound good. HOWEVER, you do not have anything in writing, or a contract.  There may be some other consideration for someone of your position, so you really can't decide if it is good or not until you know what you will receive and the cost of living, etc.

You also have to consider relocation costs. How long will it take you to recoup flights, transfers,  all your expenses. Will they reimburse you for anything?

Many performers work a few jobs to meet expenses. There are countless ways to do that as you know.  

What are the expenses of living in THAT country?  Do you know?  The average income.  The cost of food, rent, etc.   Are your parents willing to offer monthly support?

POINT TWO/PRO

Dear Sanna - told the director of the school

Every time I approach the director of the school, I feel a little annoying and timid, knocking on her door "um do you have a minute?" so today I caught her on her way out of class and said "I have news!" It felt like a better approach, but when I told her, she hadn't heard of the company (I was not surprised) and seemed pretty skeptical at first. She said I could go check it out for the first week in May if I wanted, but I needed to be back for the last 3 weeks of May for shows. I told her what I knew about the company and gave her the website and went to get ready for class. My spirits had dropped a little.

Then, after class, the director and the "career adviser" of the school seemed much more optimistic, after doing a little research. They liked what they saw about the rep, size of the company, amount of performances per year, touring, etc. They said definitely go check it out first, suggesting the first week of May....

Mom did not like that very much. It is "way too expensive" and "too short of notice" for me to fly out for the first week in May. So I emailed the company back explaining my obligations through May.

I still think this looks like a really cool, likely possibility for next year! If so, I will have a very busy few months...

Janie

POINT  ONE ....  (PRO going overseas)  It is the only job offer I have. Even if I am successful in all of many auditions. The best offer I can even hope for is a second company position. I could end up back in a ballet school. It seems to me that having been in a ballet corp makes it easier to get a job. Even if I hate it and want to come home. It will be easier for me to get a job than if I had stayed in the states.

COMMENT:

You have a job offer.  You want paid for your work as a dancer.

You must evaluate, and consider if this is right for you.   You are doing research, talking with people, etc. Because you have been offered a PAID position, considering the expenses involved, relocation, other issues, You have to look AT THE BIGGER PICTURE. It is much more than getting paid to dance.

I feel a bit concerned that they have asked you to be on location in less than 2 weeks, or so. How realistic is that for you to jump ship, pay for a visit and really get a feel for if it is right for you.   I am being a devils advocate here, not encoiuraging or discouraging.

I know that many young dancers begin to feel taken advantage of in their training. They work hard, long long hours and sit in the audience to watch other casts perform. You know the drill. Sadly it can be true in some cases and is the nature of the beast.  DO NOT ALLOW this angst to take to VERY FAR away places, unless you have INFORMATION and it makes sense and you are willing to take the risk.

This is now a business decision.  Can you afford  to move and return if you do not like it?

Yes, Students live and work abroad. You can do this if you are willing to accept responsibiltity for the risk. However, you must realize it is not like moving to another area of town, which can be costly, too.

BALLET SCHOOL -- Many dancers are graduating form college after 4 years of training and looking for work. It seems to me (I am not in the profession, yet I hear from teachers and clients in my work)  there is time for maturation. You are not 20 years.  The truth is you may still need to be in training (I do not know that, of course).  

This is not a dream, it is a real possibility that you must evaluate.

Pointe ONE.

Sanna Carapellotti, MS CCHT

Performance Specialist

DanceMind: Dear Janie -- Pros and Cons of Accepting Ballet Position VERY Far Away

Janie,

You have a lot to consider...

I will make a comment about each point(e).

Feel free to write freely about what is on your mind, your joys or fears.  

I am happy to hear that you 'love this blog."

Well, girl, This is so exciting!!!! You have a lot to think about!

Sanna Carapellotti, MS

WWW.mentalperformances.com

Dear Sanna - pros and cons

That's one of the reasons I love this blog. I have considered the pros and cons of this decision, but it's definitely helpful to write it out.

Pros:
1. It's the only actual job offer I have. Even if I am successful in all of my auditions, the best offer I can even hope for is a second company position, and I could end up back in a ballet school. It seems to me that having been in a ballet corps makes it easier to get a job, so even if I decide I hate it there and want to come home, it will probably be easier for me to get a job than if I had stayed in the states next year.
2. Good pay. The director's assistant did not really give me any details yet, so I googled the company's salaries and found an article that described them in the country's currency. I used online currency converters, and unless I messed up or the source is unreliable, the company makes between $800-1100 a week! That's about what first year corps at NYCB makes, so I couldn't hope for a higher salary even if I was offered a job here. If I do stay, the best I'll get is a small stipend, nowhere near enough to pay my bills, or perhaps even tuition.
3. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity. I may never get another chance to live in another country. Since I did not choose the college route, I almost see this as my opportunity for study abroad, except beyond the cultural and educational benefits, this will also probably help my career, and I will make money doing it, rather than spend it as most study abroad students do.
4. The weather is gorgeous. Enough said.
5. I have nothing to lose. I really have no strings right now. I don't have a job, I rent an apartment I can easily get out of, I'm attending community college which I intended to transfer out of anyway. I was prepared to move this year anyway, even if I hadn't thought it would be out of the country.
6. My parents are actually pretty supportive. Of course they don't want me to be so far away, but I was surprised to hear how ready they were to agree to this.

Cons:

1. It's very far away. This means even more expensive airfare and longer flights. (So less visits home.) But not necessarily less people visiting me, because I think this place might have more appeal than my current location. PLUS I'll be getting paid, so the airfare is more feasible.
2. I know very little about the company, which doesn't necessarily mean it will be bad, but there's a chance I might not like it, or worse, get out of shape or injured while I am there.
3. I know very little about the area, and I won't know anyone going there and I will be all by myself, but this could be the case anywhere.
4. I can only go if I become a citizen, and I really don't know the rules about that, so there could be many cons within this one, or there could be very few. I don't know. And I'm only pretty sure I could maintain my American citizenship, but not positive. Which might be bad.

That's all I got! And newsflash since I began this post: just got an email asking if I can come at the beginning of May! That is REALLY soon in case you didn't know. YIKES? ha that was a typo that it was in all caps and with a question mark, but I decided to keep it there because it seems fitting. I'm really excited, so the "yikes" is unsure. Anyway, they seem to understand that I might have obligations in May (which I might. I will need to ask about this). We shall see!!

Janie

DanceMind: Dear Janie -- So much to ponder...

It is  amazing how life can shift in a moment.  You have options!  These days that seems to be a dancer's dream. I am excited for you to have rec'd that offer, yet there is a lot to consider.

First and foremost, are you willing AND able to live VERY far from home. (I know where you are now, but not where the company is located.)  Yes, the expense is high. How dependent are you on your parents. If they are footing the bill, it may be in part their decision, too. It sounds like a time for a family discussion.  I am sure you have told them about this company. What was their response?

In your next post... Make a list of pros and cons ... 

I do believe CONGRATULATIONS are in order. Te must have liked something about you!  I am sure they realize that you can fly all that way to audition.  Good timing and very couragous!

Sanna Carapellotti, MS CCHT

Mentalperformances.com

PS - I gotta do some work at this moment and will hop back on later today.

Dear Sanna - just when I think I've got them figured out...

So casting went up for the company performances, and second cast was not scheduled to perform at all. Blah blah blah whatever. I was a little annoyed, but it was a silly part anyway, so my cast decided to just play it cool, and relax until our school shows resume next week.

Meanwhile, I just heard back from a foreign ballet company VERY far away. I sent them a DVD, photos and my resume about a month ago, and they just told me if I am willing to move there (which I thought I implied by auditioning), then they would like to offer me a position! It's all very exciting and scary, even though I have very little information. It's kind of hard for me to believe they're offering me a job without ever having seen me dance in person...

Anyway I did a lot of research and the city seems really cool. This morning during class, I decided this is something I am very seriously considering. It seems like this might be that really special and remarkable decision in my life that will change everything. It's just a really cool opportunity to go live in a foreign country - practically a really long vacation. AND on top of that, I'll be achieving my goal of getting a job in a professional ballet company. The biggest drawback are that it is VERY far, which will make traveling expensive, and perhaps that since I have never been there, there's a chance I may not like the country or the ballet company.

As far as the new country goes, this could be a pro or a con - I'll never know until I try it.

ANYWAY, back on the ranch, today they decided to throw in my cast for rehearsal, even though casting is up for all the shows and we are not doing it. So perhaps casting will change? It sounds like we are now doing it next weekend... Go figure. So maybe they do like me here after all. Maybe they will offer me a position. But now I have options! Imagine that. I have a choice in the matter. Maybe everything happens for a reason, and they didn't immediately offer me a position here so that I would audition and get a job with this foreign company. Or maybe the fact that I was offered a position will push the director here to offer me an apprenticeship here. I don't know! I don't even know what I want right now! Maybe they still wont offer me anything here. But then again, I am still waiting on a few other places.

My life is a huge complicated mess (but a somewhat happy/exciting one!)

Janie

Dear Sanna - wow I thought I made a pre-performance post

So I guess I forgot to make a little post last week before the performance madness began. We were in the theater for the greater part of last week, which was a nice way to get comfortable with the stage before the show for a change.

Casting never officially went up, for your information, but I ended up with some decent parts, actually. All corps, except a piece with only 3 people - a boy, another girl, and I, which I actually got the most compliments on, despite our initial dislike for the piece. One of the others is one of my favorite ballets, even if I was only one of many corps members. I had learned the lead, but never got to do it.

The last was a piece I was not supposed to learn at all. I ended up going to rehearsals a few weeks in, and somehow worked my way up from 4th cast to first. I felt a little bad, because the original first cast girl wasn't really ever officially taken out, and it wasn't even really hinted until she left for a pre-excused week-long absence about 3 weeks ago. It was almost more of a punishment to her that I got to do it (both shows so far, and the rest are just school shows), but she's young and had other parts and wasn't mad at me, even if she was upset. I know there's really nothing I can do, but I still didn't feel great about it.

So the shows went pretty well as far as I'm concerned. More shows for the next few weeks, even though I probably wont be performing too much. Still no words about next year, although there was mention of "talking". Dunno when. The director of the school told me. The same one who said I was probably definitely in for next year (in January), so I guess not exactly the most reliable source. I'll believe it when I hear it from the artistic director and keep you posted.

Janie

DanceMind: Dear Janie -- Hello!

How are you ?

I have been exciting involved with helping dancers and other performers get ready for auditions and Spring shows. I am constantly amazed at he powers that lie within and ow they can be unearthed once fear is reduced and managed and often eliminated. Just as you wrote in a few posts back -- just because you have a certain feeling or sensation or thought -- does not mean that you have to respond to it.

One recent performer I spoke with was surprised to hear that he does not have to believe his thoughts, or feel scared if his heart is fluttering. He realized that it was an excitement to perform no really fear as he was interpreting  it. 

Watch for those patterns and re work them to what works for you!!!

Sanna Carapellotti, MS CCHT

Performance Specialist

DANCEMIND: Dear Janie -- Life as a Dancer

I was just thinking about you!!! and your post popped into my e-mail.

Yes, these moments are difficult.  What do you do? How do you manage?

Are you thinking too much, fretting, personalizing in some way?  

Consider this -- You have done your work and your best (at the auditions) at that moment. You have to let go of the outcome because it is out of your hands now ...  Companies make decisions on numbers, technique efficiency, appearance, emotionality, etc.  What can be a fit at one company may not be a fit for another. It is a reality one must face i this industry, very fickle, very demanding, very subjective.

Even with all your hard work and adorable face, Janie, it is not always about you personally, but what they want and need THAT YOU DO NOT KNOW ABOUT.

Continue working and planning -- Ask yourself a series of what if questions to design a plan? What if - you do not receive the kind of invitation you want? (You have received one, although not what you want.)  What if you do receive something from a company you are not so sure about... maybe you are not a good fit? After the audition you realized that maybe you do not like their style, program structure, ...  

Begin to look beyond and formulate a plan. Go out and have some fun too. Get a laugh with your friends. Do something that you enjoy doing.

Do not give up your work ethic and values -- these qualities are YOURS!  

Time is important...

What do  your parents say about this?  They may have options or suggestions.

Janie, THANK YOU for your honesty and forthcoming approach. You reveal some very difficult moments and excitement that many of our readers truly benefit from. (I get personal emails from them).  You are helping dancers to realize that they have options and are not alone in their struggles.

Sanna Carapellotti, MS CCHT

MentalPerformances.com

PS --  You learned a lot during your Audition Tour.

Dear Sanna - anxiously awaiting

I received a letter from the place I wasn't that thrilled with today. Just like they said, I can go there and be a trainee next year, basically what I am doing now - an unpaid position, but only if I go for the summer program. Mwap mwap.

Still no word here. There's a show this week, so I'm trying not to get too worked up over it - I know they're busy, but I'm thinking I might ask after the show. At least I have another option for next year, which might push them in my favor?

Also, Saturday was a week from the audition where I was told we would hear in a week, and still nothing. I hope this doesn't mean it's a no! All I can do is wait, though.

Janie

DanceMind: Dear Janie -- Lots happening

I wanted to have your information about your auditions available at first glance for several days before I responded. You had a wide range of experiences on the audition trail.

I think I comment under each part so that it is directly associated.

You have discovered a lot about yourself I read. I am happy for you. 

Sanna Carapellotti, MS, CCHT

Performance Specialist

Dear Sanna - in the zone

oh yeah the "zone". I mean in general really focused, in the instance I used it earlier, really focused on losing weight. I suppose there is rarely a time when I am not really eating way too much and not really thinking about it, but usually when I get into a habit of eating well, I am very healthy.

It's not that I don't eat sweets at all, but when I am in the zone, I rarely overeat and never feel that gross full feeling. Usually this means I eat less at one time, and more often throughout the day. I have an early dinner and avoid snacks between dinner and bedtime, unless of course I am really hungry, which I know is not healthy.

Frozen veggies are my new favorite. I'm sure I am very strange, but I love eating frozen peas, still frozen. It's like my own healthy version of ice cream! Putting individual yogurts in the freezer is also good. I've unfortunately found that I cannot buy a half gallon of ice cream from the grocery store, because I will have some at least once every day until it's a little more than half way gone, and then I'll just end up eating the rest! So bad. I also can't have too many temptations at once, especially perishable ones, which make it easier to justify eating them before they spoil.

My biggest problem is just eating because I'm bored or I think it's time to eat, or I'm in a social setting with a lot of food, even though I'm not at all hungry. If I just really think about whether my stomach or my brain wants the food, usually I find that I am not really hungry.

I think I'm doing pretty well, and people have told me I look good (yay!), just not the most important people (yet). Soon I think it will be time to speak up if I still don't get any feedback from the artistic director. The show's coming up! We'll see...

Janie

Janie

Dear Sanna - advice!

Reading over my other posts, I just thought of a little piece of advice I would like to give to all:

be prepared for random things at auditions!!

such as:

telling people where you have auditioned, your success, etc. and what you are planning to do. I was a little caught off guard when asked this, and I could have been more clear about my hopes of being offered an apprenticeship where I am, and that I had only just begun my auditions

doing variations or whatever - it's a good idea to have music and something prepared just in case. I have definitely heard of directors asking people if they can do a variation after taking company class...

pointe or flat - you never know what they'll want so be prepared for either

slippery or sticky conditions. maybe shoes fit for either? maybe a little baggy of rosin. or if you need it for your heels, bring your own because many places don't have rosin or don't allow it on their floors! I discovered this the hard way...

and try to find out ahead of time if there is a dress code or if people tend to wear tights over or under, etc. I know I feel more comfortable when I am dressed like the company members


Janie

Dear Sanna - auditions 2 & 3

After that first audition, I spent the rest of the day with my mom, and the next morning we left bright and early for my next audition. This was trainee class, and I knew going in that the best position available was an unpaid trainee position. All higher positions have been filled.

I liked the teacher and the class and I thought I danced okay, but to be perfectly honest I wasn't too excited about the program. There were a LOT of girls, and I think it would be a difficult place to get noticed and promote myself next year.

They told me if I came for the summer I was pretty much guaranteed a trainee spot for next year, but unfortunately I don't think this is something I want to do. At least it is purely my decision in this case, right!

Anyway after the audition we had lunch and drove to my home town, where I got to see some old friends and my puppy! And my dad too! It was very nice to be home, if nothing else. But then there was a cattle call the next afternoon, which was just icing on the cake. My first cattle call outside of New York, which was madness last year, I was surprised there were almost 80 people there. They made one cut, after barre, maybe cutting about half the people. I made it to the end, where they spoke to about half of the remaining group about the school. I was not one of those people, so I am either above or below their standards for the school (although hopefully without sounding cocky I must say I was better than many who were in the school group). The rest of us should hear in a week. The longest week of my life, no doubt. I hate to get my hopes up, but I really would just LOVE to get this job. It seems the most promising of the weekend, so keep your fingers crossed for me!

I woke at 4:00 the next morning to catch a plane back here in order to make it to rehearsal. I had originally planned to return monday, but my teacher vetoed that plan and I had to spend a nice sum of money to change to this lovely flight. I raced into rehearsal a little over an hour late, delighted to see the artistic director present. how wonderful. I think they were happy I made the effort, so not too too upset that I was late, but jumping into my spot ice cold and exhausted from traveling and lack of sleep was not the best way to spend my sunday, nor show off my skills to the director. oh well. what are you gonna do? hopefully he'll still offer me something in the near future, because I don't think I need to tell you what a relief it would be to have my future set, at least for the next year.

Oh and did I mention I recently began some yoga classes (you know in all my spare time this past week. ha.)? Anyway if I am in fact here next year, (or even perhaps if I'm not), I am definitely interested in being certified as a yoga instructor, which would be a nice distraction/supplement to ballet that would prepare me for a backup to ballet, or just a source of some extra money if I do make it as a dancer.

Janie